The danger of enduring a narcissistic relationship

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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.

THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.

[gloriabult]

The more you try to please, the more abuse you recieve.

[mommaboombam]

They Never remember what they said. They never mean what they say. They are mean when they say it. It's a Rollercoaster for us caring people that feel and give from our hearts. It's time to stop the insanity done to us. Thanks dr again.

[bestillbaby]

Enduring is dangerous, can cause death. Death mentally, emotionally and sometimes physically.

[Theloversconjure]

Thank you so much Dr. Ramani. I realized I was conditioned as a child to endure these demons by my narcissistic family. It led me into a life full of misery. I was a paralegal / legal assistant for 15 years and would always end up working for the worst of the worst…the lawyer / boss who’d throw things, scream, blame me for everything, etc. Also ended up marrying two coverts. These beings are extremely dangerous and should not be tolerated at all. Solitude and peace have been the biggest blessings I could ask for. 😇✨💜

[r-ph]

The worst danger of all is REMAIN in the relationship with the narcissist/psychopath. It's death in life.

[GenevaDetommaso]

I just got divorced from a narcissist, I threw away who I was and lost myself. Love your videos

[flightydancer]

Please look after and save yourself because the narcissist will not truly care about you. That's the sad truth I learned. Don't endure what is not worth enduring.

[erinmorrow]

The only comfort / act of rebellion I could give myself was secretly working on my plan to leave. I was financially entrapped and had to be careful about every move I made since he was quite dangerous. Some days it was more than I could take, so I cried in the shower and prayed for help.

[MichelleLWhitney]

Every time someone says that I have no willpower, I know how wrong they are. I know how much willpower it took for me to survive. Enduring was the main survival mechanism I learned in my childhood with a narcissistic parent. It’s not a healthy way to move through the world.

[recoveringsoul]

We keep lowering our expectations until we end up with no expectation of staying alive. I used to try to just get through the day. My dad used to praise me for being such a good girl. For being so quiet. So I grew up thinking that being quiet was a good thing I know he didn't mean any harm by it. As parents we need to be careful what we tell children

[elizabethkeller]

Imagine growing up in that mess. Then, of course, went on to have more than one relationship like that. Now at 59yrs old, I know I chose poorly, I have my 2 cats, free greyhound, my handsome Bay Roan gelding. I am content & happy loading up horse, dog, and riding alone with them. It was sheer HELL, my adult life, . My escape as a child were all the farm animals, horses, milk cows, ect. I am happy again.

[starlingswallow]

My favorite is the message: "marriage is hard..."
🤦🏻‍♀️
My marriage to an abuser was hard. When there is real love, acceptance and respect, marriage is a breeze! it's like breathing!
I'm sitting here in tears....for what I went through and for the millions of others who've been hurt by abuse and those who are still in it. My freaking heart!! 💔

[MP-nmdf]

Just a reminder to anyone out there who has endured long term abuse from a narcissist/psychopath: months turn into years and years turn into decades and before you know it you’ve spent 30+ years being abused in a marriage on top of parental abuse as a child. It is so insidious and it can happen to anyone. You have to face your fears, it will be one of the hardest things you do in your life but it’s the only way to end it, run for your life!

[janeloraine]

Silent, soul-crushing endurance, is exactly what it is to forfeit one's self to endure a narcissistic relationship. Thank you for saying the quiet part out loud.

[adelaidamilan]

Hi Dr Ramani! I was young and stupid and now I'm old and stupid. I'm in a 45 plus year relationship. I saw red flags and, at the time, didn't know what they meant. I thought that this person would only mature over the years...😔Not!!! There were plans I had for my life and never accomplished any of them...well, maybe one of them. All I think about is that, if reincarnation is real and I had all of today's memories, I would so try to be smarter about this kind of thing. I feel it's too late for me to start over again at my age and have no place to go and no financial resources, therefore I'm stuck for the rest of my life with no hope of ever being the person I used to be. Well...that's it...💔

[Silly_Hobbit_Twix_Are__Squids]

Been told so many times I'm "one of the strongest people" a person knows. I'm TIRED of being strong. My body and mind is failing me and I don't believe in Hell as an actual place but endurance is the closest to Hell I feel I can be.

[Retrosenescent]

I was in a relationship that only lasted 8 months, but I received enough negativity and invalidation and belittlement to last a lifetime. I really don’t ever want to be with another partner who is constantly negative and invalidating. It’s truly AWFUL to be around. It’s way more enjoyable to just be alone than to put up with that

[MamaMilkBubbles]

Has anyone stayed in the relationship so their kids can grow up in a two-parent household? Staying sane and single for the sake of the kids is an option. Finding a healthy relationship is also an option. I think the fear of not know what to do or what the outcome will be is crippling.

[Betsys]

YES!!!YES!!!!YES!!! Validation!!! My mom literally praised me for enduring her abuse. “You roll with the punches”, “You keep your chin up” “You passed the test”! (She’d say this kind of thing after putting me through some unimaginably horrible crap) The really twisted thing? I’m now 52 and she’s 80 and she’ll take credit for things in my life that I get through. She’ll say things like “I raised you that way, I raised you to be tough” 🙄🤮👎🏼

[jsmithsemper]

It made me feel better when ppl who knew my story would say, “no person could’ve handled it well.”

Validating people’s pain brings them back into their own skin where they can & will begin to seek answers, treatment, etc.