Freedom from the Burden of Judging - A Conversation with Michael Wilcox (Part 2)

Hi everyone, this is Aubrey Chaves from Faith Matters. This is part two of our conversation with Michael Wilcox, and if you haven’t heard part one yet, it helps set up some important context for this episode. This is really not an interview so much as a story Michael tells: the story of his father, who navigated life in the mid-20th century as a gay man and a Latter-day Saint.

This story delves into the messy and painful predicaments his family faced, when reality failed to fit the predictable ideal. It also offers a glimpse into the experience of an LGBTQ member of the church several decades ago, before we became accustomed to talking about it as a community. And we want to emphasize that we’re not sharing this story because of its outcome, and in fact, quite the opposite: we found in this story the beautiful insight that we can release ourselves completely from judging others and love without an agenda—and it’s the relationships free of judgment and agendas that become celestial in and of themselves.

We want to thank Michael for being incredibly honest and vulnerable here, and for coming on to share so generously with us again.

[nataleefehr]

Brother Wilcox,
I was in your father’s English class in High School! I loved hearing him tells us the stories of great literature. He was a gifted story teller. I remember one day he was telling us a story and you walked into his classroom. He politely excused himself to talk with you. After you left, he apologized to the class and explained that you were his son. I remember the emotion and love he had for you.
I loved your father and have learned alot from the Wilcox men! Thank you!❤

[sheilasiggard]

That was one of the sweetest, most meaningful podcasts I’ve ever heard - Parts 1 & 2. Thank you Dr Wilcox for being so transparent and instructional and thanks, Faith Matters!

[grayruffell]

wonderful thank Brother Wilcox! Blessing from New Zealand!!

[mistys]

Brother Wilcox helped heal my soul in deep ways concerning my own father and circumstances that caused much heartache and pain and still can. I listened to his talk “when prayers seem unanswered” and it was nothing short of miraculous in the healing it gave my mind and heart. Thank you so much. 💕

[sherriedix]

I loved this. My husbands brother died at 42 after serving a mission and then living a gay lifestyle. His death was such a tragedy. I know he is at peace now. Thanks for sharing. You are such a choice spirit!

[yolandafuller]

Thank you very much Bro. Wilcox for sharing your personal life with us. It has strengthen me and taught me to keep on using the principles that my Savior Jesus Christ so perfectly taught us during his ministry. He knows us and is our perfect judge and advocate.

[elainecarter]

Loved this conversation with Michael Wilcox. Thank you Bro. Wilcox for sharing your story about your wonderful relationship with your Father. So grateful that you taught all of us about just being loving and leaving judgment to God. I loved your "great release" which all of us need to gain. When I read in the Book of Mormon about all things being restored to their proper and perfect frame, I truly believe that one thing that will be made perfect will be the removal of same-sex attraction, which I am convinced is a result of living in a polluted and fallen world, that does terrible things to our mortal bodies. Your Father's radiant face after death is a further witness to me of that belief. His agony was gone. Michael is an amazing teacher. I always learn SO much from him.

[vickirobison]

Brother Wilcox never fails to teach my soul every time I listen to him. Thank you so much for sharing this most personal message of love.

[vincemorgan]

What a beautiful story and hopeful picture of life after death. I’m so glad I stumbled across this video . Thank you Brother Wilcox and the interviewers.

[lissawoodburyjensen]

I love Brother Wilcox! He is so pure and so true. I love how he thinks “outside the box” without compromising his covenants or testimony. He is an independent thinker and helps me to under my own unique testimony. Mere words don’t suffice when trying to articulate what he has opened my mind and spirit to.

[jackiemilton]

I’ve been a huge fan of Brother Wilcox and this is the first time he really shares about his father and his nuclear family dynamics. Thank you sharing all this with us! I just love you for who you are. Thank you for always speaking to my soul!!

[sheldonewell]

I love Michael and always wondered about his father. He grew up in my ward and I was his mother’s Bishop. She was a sweetheart of a woman, always faithful and considerate. We called her the candy lady as she was always indulging my children with candy. Her life was hard but she accepted it and was ever faithful to our Savior. Michael has always been an inspiration to me and many others. His wife was a jewel, kind, considerate and loving. I now understand the family better and wish them peace and joy.
A friend of the Wilcox family.
Sheldon F. Ewell

[mariannemarlor]

I have shed tears listening to both part 1 and part 2. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.❤️

[lorenefullmer]

Thank you so much Brother Wilcox. My heart has been touched by your story. I have listened to the recordings of your talks over and over for several years, and I appreciate your courage and compassion in telling the rest of the story about your father. I needed to hear these words from you as I am facing some related but different challenges in my own family. Thank you for especially sharing about your father coming to you after his passing. I hope that someday you can also have a visit from your sweet eternal companion. Thank you again.

[lightscenters]

Ive cried through this whole podcast. I thank you deeply.. some in our family have come out gay.. all men so far. It has broken families and had dire effects. It has been painful. I have tried to be kind, meaning not hateful.. but I have not been able to reach out and be loving. It has been painful to watch the devistation in our family. I have a grandchild that I think willl soon come out as gay also. After watching your podcast, Bro Wilcox, I think I can handle this much better. More Christlike. With love unfeigned. I am deeply grateful. thank you so much. thank you.

[davidaustin]

This has been so helpful for me. Thank you 42:41

[lornaphillips]

Thank you for this beautiful podcast Brother Wilcox. I have learned so much and have felt the
Spirit. ♥️🙏🏻

[benjaminsmith]

Bro. Wilcox, this is important perspective to share to know why some dads don’t communicate with their kids or don’t have the level of engagement that people expect them to and unfairly call them “deadbeat dads”. There is a lot of real shame and pain that factors into the distance. The judgment piece is huge.

[dolce]

What a beautiful conversation. Thank you so much for sharing and it’s a perfect ending to the story. Joy!

[jenkohler]

What a blessing to us all!
Thank you!
❤