Learning McFadden To Waltz (1890)

Dedicated to the gang.

words and music by M. F. Carey
published by Cluett & Sons

sung by sheet music singer, Fred Feild
piano according to the sheet music

1. Clarence McFadden he wanted to waltz
But his feet wasn't gaited that way
So he saw a professor and stated his case
And said he was willing to pay
The professor looked down in alarm at his feet
As he viewed their enormous expanse
And he tacked on a five to his regular price
For learning McFadden to dance

Chorus:
One, two, three, balance like me
You're quite a fairy, but you have your faults
While your left foot is lazy your right foot is crazy
But don't be unaisy, I'll learn you to waltz

2. He took out McFadden before the whole class
And he showed him the step once or twice
But McFadden's two feet got tied into a knot
Sure he thought he was standing on ice
At last he broke loose and struck out with a will
Never looking behind or before
But his head got so dizzy he fell on his face
And chewed all the wax off the floor

3. McFadden soon got the step into his head
But it wouldn't go into his feet
He hummed "La Gitana" from morning till night
And he counted his steps on the street
One night he went home to his room to retire
After painting the town a bright red
Sure he dreamt he was waltzing and let out his feet
And he kicked the dash-board off the bed

4. When Clarence had practiced the step for a while
Sure he thought that he had it down fine
He went to a girl and he asked her to dance
And he wheeled her out into the line
He walked on her feet, and he fractured her toes
And he said that her movement was false
Sure the poor girl went round for two weeks on a crutch
For learning McFadden to waltz

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Found in the book "More Favorite Songs of the Nineties" by Dover Publications.

Get the sheet music and MIDI at:

[dianewood]

Diane here again Fred,  Foster and Allen recorded this they changed the name in on the tape I had to Terence but you could not use fairy today how times have changed I live in the  North of England Foster and Allen were born in Ireland and world famous I was dreaming last night   I was singing this song and when I saw it I had to listen it again My mum Pauline or mom as Americans say loves this song she is 74 and is not frail and in perfect healthlove Diane