10 really reassuring truths that helped me overcome my Existential Crisis and Derealization

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Complete Recovery Course for recovering from DP/DR & Existential Anxiety:

Instagram @robinschindelka

[itlearnerjill]

Point 6 really hit me... I lost my grandmother in August 2022, and since then, in addition to mourning her, I've been terrified of death and that there's "nothing" when we die. Some people truly believe in "nothing". I used to firmly believe in an afterlife. I desperately want to be reunited with my family and friends who will eventually depart from this world as I know them now... That's why in this video when you said "It's impossible for something to become 'nothing', and impossible for something to disappear into nothing" it was so, so comforting. I don't know why I let this opinion of "nothing" affect me so hard, but it did, and here I am, wondering why I'm here and how I can overcome my debilitating fear of death. It feels so indescribably and unbearably lonely at times. It's hard to believe I've only been enduring it for little over a week. I am so scared this is how I'll be for the rest of my life.

Thank you so much for this video. I'm getting therapy, but today was only an intake appointment. Your words really helped me right now. I hope this journey will help me become someone I want to be... someone who believes again <3

Edit (April 11th 2023): Just wanted to post an update! I am doing tremendously better and have been in therapy for nearly three months now. The fear of death and the overwhelming thoughts of existence have definitely lessened in intensity and I feel ready to live and embrace the human experience again :') Just wanted to say, IT IS POSSIBLE to get out of this and it WON'T last forever. I'm still struggling a little, I'm not perfect, but I am getting well again. I can't stress enough how important mental health is. Please see a professional if you can! There is NO shame in it!

Edit (January 20th, 2024): Hi! I wanted to provide another update, one year later. I am happy to say that I am pretty much at peace with death and that it is no longer triggering for me to consider ALL the possibilities of what happens after we die. Occasionally the fear creeps up (it's NORMAL) but I do not let it consume me, it does not ruin my day, and I use the fear instead to fully enjoy my life and cherish everyone in my life while I'm still here. I am still in therapy for other issues, but it helped me the most to address my death anxiety and existentialism. It IS possible to come out of this, I promise. I still stress that mental health is very important and I encourage everyone to pursue therapy if it's possible for you to do so. You won't regret it <3 Please take care and be gentle with yourself. Do not lose hope. Hold onto hope and hold on to love. It's worth it.

[CathysWorld]

I have found my people in this comments section. I’m so glad to know that I’m not alone I’m feeling these awful feelings. It feels like it won’t end sometimes. I’ve been struggling for nearly a week, I think. I can’t get out of bed or function like I used to, ever since these thoughts invaded my brain.

I have never felt so low in my life. It’s not a fun thing to experience and I wish we could all just have a group hug. I nearly had to check myself into the mental hospital.

It’s been a tough time, but seeing that other people are experiencing this too, and that you all survived it, makes me feel a little bit better.

I’m working through it as best as I know how, right now. Please pray for me.

[mrc.p]

I struggle everyday with my sense of self. Dont feel connected to myself anymore. Something is really off. I question who am i, why am i doing something when im doing it. Dont recognise myself in the mirror anymore. My eyesight is off, cant focus my eyes properly. Never happy at all. Cant sit with myself anymore, because im afraid of my thought patterns. Distract myself with my phone alot. I feel like theres something that needs figuring out, a question that needs answering. Im constantly daydreaming, tuning out of reality and im suddenly aware of my own mortality🥺

[AndrewHedlund]

You won’t experience death. You’ll only experience life.

[bella-xotp]

Hi robin, I’m bella and I’m 17 and just a day over a week ago I suffered an extreme panic attack that ultimately lead me into Dpdr. I have experienced feelings of derealization before and I’ve been fixated towards existential thinking for quite a while now, but never has it been so severe and never have I felt stuck in such a state all hours around the clock. You see, I am a fighter, as I have endured many traumas and had to find independence at just 16 entering into the foster system. I’d like to think of myself as a spiritual individual so it was jarring to me to be so frightened by thoughts and ideas that used to only intrigue me. I consider myself lucky because I already knew of Dpdr since I had experienced derealization during times of anxiety or previous panic attacks. I started searching the internet desperately to find answers. And before I realized what I was experiencing, I had even convinced myself that I had a brain tumor. I found this video yesterday and I’ve been incorporating the advice heavily along with advice of other recovered dpdr sufferers and Today was my first day with almost NO anxiety. I wanted to come back and thank you because your words have heavily impacted me and helped me find a stronger sense of peace and hope. I am definitely not fully recovered but I have already gotten so much better at accepting my feelings and letting them be present with me. I hope your channel gets more recognition because this is life saving content. Thank you for what you do, from the bottom of my heart, thank you.

[mommomofmeemoush]

You are truly an angel for this, thank you so much
I recommend watching the whole video, but for those that need to hear it fast here are the notes I took:
1. I am here right now
2. Only love is real
3. I dont need control to find peace
4. It's normal to have an Existential crisis (even if it's uncomfortable)
5. The universe (God) has your back
6. Death as we perceive it doesn't exist
7. My actions have meaningful impacts
8. I can always return to Love
9. Everyone is on the same boat (You are not alone in life)
10. The world isn't good or bad you choose the way you see it
You are not a victim of life, you are a victim of what you choose to see the world, the world is perfect the way it is

[explainous]

I am thinking deeply about the meaning of life. Why am I doing what I am doing? What is the purpose of studying, preparing for a good job or anything if, in the end, I will die? Your video actually assuaged that inner restlessness. When in doubt, love is the answer. We are all in this together, and through love only, we can calm our restless souls.

[skybrie]

This made me cry. I’ve been so lost, so depressed and anxiety ridden from constant thoughts about my life and existence. And thinking my life is over after every inconvenience. You have brought peace to my mind with this video, it really touched me and I find all of these little quotes very helpful for the crisis I’m going through. Thank you so much ❤️

[Colin.H]

I don’t share too much about myself on the internet, but I would like to say that I definitely suffer from existential dread. Hearing someone say that all that matters is that i’m here helps so much and I want to thank you for what you put out.

Edit: I’d also like to say that death is portrayed too harshly, and most if not all people are ready for death when it happens. When you’re still young you’ll always think that you don’t want to die but you will live a fulfilling life if you want too, and you’ll be happy for the life you lived and ready for whatever comes next.

[emmadutton]

I never comment on youtube videos but I’ve been struggling with existential thoughts for as long as I can remember. I was raised as a Christian and this exposed me to thoughts of afterlife/god etc at a very young age and one day something clicked in me and I just didn’t believe it anymore. I’ve repressed these fears for years but in the last month since dropping out of university and my grandma becoming ill I’ve just had this existential dread that’s hanging over me like a black cloud. And for once I know that I can’t push it away and have to actually tackle these uncomfortable thoughts. This month I’ve been throwing up, struggling to sleep, having panic attacks and zoning out. Every website I went on only worsened my mental state, until I came across this video. THANKYOU, it’s only temporary but my mind is at ease even if for a few minutes. I want to wish anyone struggling through this my love and support, we are more important than we know💖💖💖💖

[heyyy]

"Only love is real" is just really comforting idk why :) thank u so much for this im genuinely so so grateful for this. This whole day ive been feeling so anxious, the only way i could describe it was utter dread and angst, just complete fear. And this, along with other videos, helped me bc no matter how hard i searched before i couldnt resonate with anything, but really it was quite simple, i just had existential anxiety. The fact that what im feeling has a name, the fact that its a real concept calms me down so much, just knowing that im not alone and this is normal and okay and im not the only one who has experienced this is so calming. I really thought i was going crazy. I knew i wasnt crazy but there was something in me that was like "damn this is really not normal. Am i going insane? Am i even real?? Like my whole life is turned upside down black is white up is down what the actual f is going on. What is going on with me." Like actually, i had this same situation before and i genuinely thought i was going insane. It was much worse for me before because i just generally had a very negative victim mindset, im much stronger, more positive and open now which def helped me a lot to overcome this. I didnt just wallow in my feelings, i did something about them and accepted them and im proud of myself. Period. We will all get thru this, i mean this with my whole heart, please remember you are never alone and you will get thru this, i guarantee you there is ALWAYS a solution, theres a version of u somewhere right now who got through this. You will be okay. And you know ehat, if ur not okay now thats also okay. Its okay to not be okay. Its okay to be okay. Its okay to be wherever ur at now no matter what state ur in. The way u are right now is okay. There is no right or wrong or normal or not normal. It just is the way it is. You. Are. Never. Alone. You are normal, you will be okay, your situation has been experienced by someone else before and they got through it. And so can you. I love u and u can do this. You are not alone. <3

[anonchu]

Hi Robin, I've been suffering from extreme depression since almost a year now and it's slowly transitioned into an existential crisis that's virtually made me incapable of doing anything. This video was one of the first that showed up when I was searching about existential crises and it's been a huge source of comfort for me. Each one of these truths gave me something to think about and they calmed me in a way I've rarely ever felt before in this state. Thank you so much for putting this video out and for doing all the work that you do for our community!

[BattlesCinematics]

Thank you for making this video, an existential crisis seems like the sort of thing that most people have heard of but don't actually know what it is so I'm seriously grateful for you highlighting the issue. I sure as hell wasn't aware of what it was but about a month ago I was just minding my own business one night and out of nowhere I just started having these thoughts about life and death, the mystery of existance and the futile nature of it all. It was as if I slipped into this little pit in my mind where all the brutal truths about the nature of existence had been living without my knowledge. Suddenly they were revealed to me and I felt like life would never be the same now that I'd realised these things. Thoughts started to get really dark and the notion of eventual suicide was cropping up while I was writhing in my bed, trying to sleep.

Thankfully, the absolute worst feelings took place over the first 5 days or so and it has been a little bit less severe for me since. These thoughts have literally been making me feel physically sick, I get a horrible knot in my stomach, it gave me diarrhea and I've felt like throwing up a few times.

I'm doing as much research as I can into this and am taking solace in the fact that according to the internet, it shouldn't last forever. I went to the park to meditate yesterday and as I was sitting there, breathing, I started to get really overwhelmed. A hazy fuzziness started radiating through my entire body and my mind felt as though it could have just disintegrated into the void at any moment. I was tempted to just get up and walk it off out of sheer terror but I sat there with it for about 10 minutes doing my best to acknowledge and accept the feelings whilst also acknowledging the presence of my body and focusing on my breathing.
Despite the horrors of the thoughts, facing them, being strong and not letting them beat me felt really, really carthartic. Beautiful even. I became so emotional I started crying tears of joy. At that moment I realised not all hope is lost and that life is actually really beautiful in a lot of profound ways.

I'm really trying to look at this as an interesting experience that will ultimately lead to positive change in my life. If anything, I'm starting to feel really thankful for my mind and body, I'm amazed by what I am now, to be honest. What amazing creatures we are that our brain can subconsciously detect when you aren't living life the way you know you should be so it starts hitting you with these insane realisations so that you hopefully get your shit together and starting doing what is right for you. Despite it feeling like your mind turning against you, it's the total opposite. You are an amazing thing made of many different parts, all of which want the best for you. Feelings like this are a warning that you aren't doing what you know you should be.

Good luck to all of you going on this journey. It's for the best! You are loved.

[costasphilippou]

I suffered with those thoughts and feelings many many years ago, over 20 years ago. I was young at the time maybe 19. I didn’t even know what it was, never spoke to anyone about it, didn’t tell a soul. I would sleep, felt I was the only one on the planet, in the universe that had somehow come to the realization that nothing is real, and even if it was what were we all doing here…..I struggled with these thought for what felt like an eternity, in the end it was about a year. I also fell into a deep depression during this time, how can you not feel sadness and depressed when you feel that existence is meaningless, it is sad and frightening thought. I can clearly remember how the mere thought would make my body shake. I was raised in a religious family and it honestly made things worse and good. The only comfort I can give you all, is that you truly aren’t alone. The fact that there are people like Robin that are there to offer help and advice is wonderful. Keep searching for an answer you will find it in the most unexpected place. It won’t cure you instantly, it will merely offer a small glimpse of hope, and that is all you need. Mine was a very strange one, I was watching the movie the Shawshank Redemption and towards the end of the movie, one of the characters says “get busy living”.
It triggered something in me at that moment, I suddenly realized that all this thinking, all this worry, life was passing me by. As difficult as it was a woke up every morning and looked at a paper that I wrote the words on and would get dressed and leave home.
I made as many plans as I could, to keep busy every single day, the busier the better. Slowly my focus moved from my existential thoughts and fears to what I was doing daily. I’m not saying this is the cure, and some would say that it’s merely a distraction tactic, but I think it worked by filling my mind with so many other thoughts that eventually I didn’t have time to think about existential thoughts. When I did think about them so much time had passed that I moved on way quicker, and forget about the impact they had. I hope the above can offer even one person some comfort, good luck my fellow people.

[benjaminthomas]

Thank you so much for your help!

"Only love is real" really struck me I have only very recently come to terms with my DPDR and one of the things I find comes up in my writings (I diarise to get the thoughts and words out) is the idea that if nothing else, the energy and act love of love for a person or thing can transcend any reality, real or false. So to hear this sentiment echoed is very reassuring.

I hope anyone reading this finds the comfort they need. Just because something isn't real/meaningful doesn't mean it's bad xx

[alicehandscombe]

I love these robin thank you 💜 ‘only love is real’ resonates so much for me.
Realising that the thoughts which are alarming, urgent, fear etc are unhelpful ones which I can let go of & that my real truth / inner wisdom are the thoughts which allow me to feel love, calm, quiet, cool simplifies everything so much for me ❤️

[movewithcouragecoaching]

Beautiful Robin, thank you! Each thought you outline is also an affirmation or intention. I loved "I don't need control to find peace."

[megankilleen]

Thank you so much for this. I’ve been struggling bad with existential anxiety recently and it’s nice to know I’m not alone. Fear is the opposite of trust. Thank you ❤❤❤!!

[playful]

I'm so in the emotion of love that i have found this channel and the beautiful soul you are. This video felt like an eternal mother kissing me and saying "it's all good", and i feel total peace and fulfilment and zest for life. Thank you for beautifully articulating things I was struggling to. Much love to you! 🙂

[Maria-scwz]

Robin, thank you kindly for taking your time to uploading this. I almost cried many times while hearing your encouragement and view point through the screen. I’ve been feeling very lost in life and you’re right, I’ve been looking for love within myself, but I can’t seem to find it at this time. This was extremely helpful and soothing, I’m going to watch this daily, so that I can continue to remember what you say. Thank you for your love and guidance ❤️