Dos and Don'ts of Chinese Etiquette: Things You Should NEVER Do According to Chinese Tradition!

I grew up with many etiquette rules in my family, and I definitely think these rules helped shape me into a better version of myself.

So today I’m going to share some of these with you, from posture, Chinese table manners, chopstick etiquette, tea serving etiquette to respecting elders.

Maybe not all of them will apply to your family, but it might be useful if you ever visit a Chinese household.

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#ChineseEtiquette #ChineseTableManners #ChopstickEtiquette
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Cinematographer: Jimmy Xie

[SweetandMellow]

When you serve a tea cup to elderly you serve it with two hands. That's what my dad taught me.

[KaiDiization]

Respecting elders is one of traditional values in Chinese history. Ancient people have strong moral character. Thus, your etiquette and attitude will reflect your inner world.

[asveron]

Here's the ones that I find still more prominent today:

Minor: Slouching. You still get called out, but usually a minor reminder.
Medium: Playing with chopsticks.
Medium: Fidgeting. Shaking your feet is really bad.
Medium: Greet all your non-nuclear family elders (aunt, uncles etc). Then if new elders visit that house, stop what you are doing in whatever room and go greet them in the main room. This is more severe for Chinese people, but I don't think anyone cares that foreign person doesn't know to do this.
Severe: Picking specific things in a dish. I've once seen a foreigner only pick out the chicken from a mixed dish like Kungpao chicken. It was really weird I didn't even realize that was an option until then.

Medium: Eating before your elders when it's not just the nuclear family. The more familiar you are with the extended family elder the less it's a problem.
Severe: Eating before a grandparent. Even if your a foreigner, its going to be really awkward for everyone.


Other things in the video I've occasionally heard about but is not a big deal among any family members I know.

[Sezbet]

I’m British, and grew up in the 70s, we had to ask permission before leaving the dinner table, and it was very bad form not to finish your food (especially understandable since both my parents knew rationing. My father also insisted we never turn our noses up at food without trying it once. In Britain we usually make tea in cups or mugs, it is modern etiquette to always check if anyone else wants tea or coffee before going to make some.

[CiCiLi]

Love your videos and your awesome outfits!

[paulphelps]

This video is most appreciated; such manners should become standard universally.

[Gelicidiad]

I saw so many flashbacks to my childhood as my family taught me a lot of these etiquette rules. A lot of them were unspoken, like the ones about your demeanor, but there are ones that were definitely taught over and over again, especially the slouching one! (I am horrible and have slouched a lot since moving away from my family)

[sarahkatecoleman]

I just showed this to my son. He’s seven and he thinks your rules are very good. He was under the impression that Chinese people don’t like Americans so I showed him your videos and asked him if he though you were against us. He said “No she seems nice!” I also pointed out how many of your rules are similar to our rules here. Thank you for the random social studies lesson ❤️

[magnummagpie]

Some of these are ones my Chinese teacher taught me. The crossed leg one is especially funny and difficult to comply with for me because in my families (English/Irish) etiquette is that you gently cross your ankles so that they sort of tuck under your chair. Doing that also stops me from fidgeting so much because it reminds me where my feet are😅☺️ great video!

[natalieschoenn]

respect for elders should be something the whole world does

[slc]

This etiquette is so interesting! I have never actually known that Chinese people still practice etiquette (because of the cultural revolution) but I am very happy that it has survived!

[sanxian]

This is such a wonderful channel. I think the best thing I can do for Ally, and to promote Han Culture, is to share this. ❤️

[LB-ouwt]

It's always interesting how the VAST majority of these are applicable to Western etiquette. Generally human beings find the same things unpleasant or pleasant. Etiquette is based in consideration towards others, especially table manners. The simple act of pointing the spout away from someone may be based in not spilling tea directly on someone if the pot gets tipped or just making it easier for the other person to use the handle when they want to pour.

[KaiDiization]

10 common house rules in America today:

Always say please and thank you
Always be kind
Complete homework before playing
Put things back where you found them
Clean up plates after eating
Have dinner together as a family
No phones at the dinner table
Help carry in the groceries
No shouting
No going to bed angry


25 basic house rules:

1. We are a family, first and foremost
2. Mom and Dad are in charge. Period
3. You will respect everyone who lives here. Always
4. Rules are rules, they are not general guidelines
5. Life is not always about you, sometimes it is about others
6. You are not expected to be perfect, therefore, you may not expect perfection from others, even Mom and Dad
7. Sometimes grace is extended, but grace is not to be expected
8. If you don’t have something nice to say, just keep it shut
9. You are expected to respond or acknowledge when you are spoken to, ear buds or not
10. If you want to add something to the family calendar, you need to give plenty of notice
11. If you are caught lying about something, you will receive twice the consequences. Being honest is always your best option
12. Man or woman, girl or boy, you are expected to keep your word
13. If your plans have changed, you need to tell Mom or Dad as soon as they change
14. It does not matter to us what happens in the lives of your friends. This is your life – you live here
15. There are plenty of times to have a discussion, you may always speak your mind – as long as you do it in a respectful way
16. When someone is speaking, they have the floor
17. If you would like privileges, you will need to fulfill your responsibilities
18. If you want to borrow something, you will need to ask & not just take it
19. When you borrow something, you will need to return it as you found it and to where you found it
20. There is no maid who lives here
21. If you make a mess, clean it up
22. When you take something out, put it back
23. If you take the last of something, tell the person who needs to know
24. If you break something, you will be involved in the fixing or replacing process
25. Electronics are a privilege, not a right

[ColonelMarcellus]

And the prettiest Chinese lady in the world was found to make this presentation.

[irblolz]

I believe everyone should have these rules. Not only because I grew up with them, society as a whole would probably be a little better

[LISA.WANG.]

Etiquette isn't as emphasized as much anymore so I'm glad there's a video like this 😄😂

[zytfidm]

we need to help promote her channel. The good things need to be unveiled.

[mordecaijacob]

Wow I like Chinese etiquette. Very attractive and Honourable

[audreymorel]

I love your videos. As a foreigner still learning about Chinese culture, I realise that there are many differences with my own culture (French). And most of the time, I do it wrong only because I didn't know it could be wrong. I didn't realise that some things are so important. I see a comment about being picky with food, but at my house we always do it. If there is a mixed dish, each person will eat what they prefer in it. It is normal here and better than having food that you won't like. Even if we always learned to try a little of everything.
I will be more careful of my doings when I visit Chinese friends.