Youth Sports: What Parents Need to Hear To Help Their Kids Develop into Good or Great Athletes

Helping your kids and their teams succeed in youth sports is neither obvious or intuitive to most of us. We need some outside professional perspective to get it right. Today, most are getting things horribly wrong. This video is an interview with Peter Mattsson, the elite sports director of the Swedish Sports Confederation. He understands that to succeed at the highest level in sports, we must learn to succeed at the lowest levels. Many, many players who have enormous potential to make it at the highest levels (or simply enjoy amateur sports for life) are quitting before the age of 12, when it's simply too early to tell anything about their potential. Not only are we not getting things right as loving and supportive parents, we're usually adding unnecessary pressure and increasing the risk of injury to our kids. This eye-opening video will hopefully form the basis of some smart discussion for any sports team or club, jumpstarting a dialog between the parents and the coaches about how long the season should be, how many away-tournaments they should play, how many hours they should practice, how to help them get more free play, what to do about yelling coaches, and creating policies regarding what parents should say (or rather not say) on the sideline and in the car on the way home -- all to help keep the kids from getting injured or quitting early. Good news is that fixing the system isn't that complicated.

[Marez]

Oh man.... I've been doing this all wrong... my son is 9 and plays in comp soccer.. I know I am really hard on him. As he always looks over for my approval. I would prefer to see him having fun, then taking the game this seriously. Thank you for posting this video.

[jaffacake]

Very interesting interview. Thank you. Single sports mum to a 13 year old basketball athlete. He was head-hunted by a big team, and I have many misgivings about the level of stress and competitiveness that these kids live under. He is set on playing with that team, and the level is higher than anything we have locally, but I sometimes do think that there is a lack of general learning and a focus on winning leagues and tournaments. The high scorers are given priority over other well-rounded players and I always feel things are being done with a skewered vision of the future and with a lack of support for the mental health of these young athletes. Some parents on the benches are way too pushy and demanding. Which is understandable to a point, when people are investing time and money, but they are only children, and I can't help think of the damage being done emotionally and psychologically. I sometimes ponder if it wouldn't be better to put him back in a local team, where he can learn all kinds of skills without the ultra competitiveness and individuality that comes with elite sports, but I would then have to live with the "what if"...what if he doesn't go further because I didn't invest the time and effort... Then I tell myself, whoever is going to make it, will probably make it anyway, regardless. But still. Tough to know if you are doing the right thing or not as a parent, when you haven't played the sport or been an athlete at that level or from such a young age. Videos like these are interesting and insightful.

[deepakgopalsharma]

Great interview, so much to take away from this video.

[genmathletesmentaltoughnes]

Really great interview! Touched on many aspects of youth sport psychology like introducing fun and not using critical language. Whenever I get the chance to ask sport psychologists who work with children about their biggest challenge, surprisingly the answer was always: 'Parents'.

[rabitoblanco]

My 11yo recently asked to play soccer-- I immediately started looking up nearby clubs when he said "but I don't want to join a club, I just want to play for fun!"
Try and find a "just fun" soccer game in Metro Atlanta, for kids! It's kind-blowing difficult, and immediately I realized the problem here!
Great video, thank you.

[MAFA.ACADEMY]

Thank you guys, I go searching in Youtube for more videos of PETER MATTSSON

[mosocceracademy]

The topic and video shed light on the pressure that youth athletes experience and question why such burdens are placed on kids. In terms of parents, we often try to empathize and imagine how we would handle situations if we were in their place. However, it's crucial to recognize that the child, not the parent, is the one in that position. Especially in sports like soccer/football, split-second decisions are imperative, involving looking, hearing, defending, dribbling, and turning. The last thing they need is someone else shouting instructions on what to do and where to go. Conversely, many clubs and teams prioritize wins, rankings, and trophies for marketing purposes, often sacrificing quality for quantity. This intense pressure to win is imposed on kids, with potential consequences if they don't meet expectations. But why ?

Lastly, it's imperative to listen to and understand what the child enjoys, rather than forcing them to pursue a sport solely based on a parent's preference. If a child doesn't find joy in a sport but is pushed into it due to parental wishes, fear, or embarrassment, it's important to reassess. We must reevaluate the essence of youth sports and recognize that not every child will reach the highest professional level. Instead, we should focus on understanding each child's limits and providing a supportive environment that fosters their individual growth

[davidtorres]

I am thrilled to see an interview with an expert on this, especially as we look back on a few years of COVID. Managing youth sports is a big part of my job so I am thoroughly enjoying learning more about what really helps the kids because at the end of the day, youth sports programs are for THEM.

[tzeboss]

I am in Norway and this is not true. Those who suceed in Norway dedicate themselves to training. We Are good at skiing beacause we have a lot of snow. + skiing is all about condition so you can Get that from many sports. + not many countries ski. Thats why we have so many olympic medals. + we are rich so we can afford to train a lot and have access to facilities.

[varen]

Thank you for making this video. I wish this content was a mandatory watch for all the coaches. My son who is an 11 year old soccer player with big aspirations and dreams, wants to quit because his coach is too hard on him. Burn out is a real thing for young athletes.

[johnhusks]

At 33.10 he talks about books, what books are these?

[jarhead_jr]

The size of the US makes it a challenge to not have a pay to play system. If you live in a big city, there are opportunities to play teams locally, but if you are in a more rural area, there may not be another team for 50 miles in the sports that are less popular. I listened to an interesting podcast about Belgium's youth soccer program and they cited the small size of the country makes it very easy to have lots of local teams and you never have to travel far even to go to the other end of the country. Also easier to unite a common philosophy.

[funhouse]

Just take a look at athletes like Tiger Woods, Floyd Mayweather and Serena Williams, just to name a few.. All of their fathers were heavily involved and critical of their development. It’s pretty obvious that the more you train, the more you get out of it.

[spacecadet]

Great content and conversation. Terrible transition music.

[tylermaxgolf]

America is all about competition, so how do you teach your child to have fun but also have the competitive spirit so they dont get left behind their peers

[Iaotle]

While I mostly agree, I think Norway specifically also has genetics and a landmass conducive to practicing olympic sports, which makes them have a massive advantage. Being 2m tall and having godlike genetics along with a crapton of mountains always nearby probably helps them dominate sports.

[jodaddylv]

Just googled which country has the most Olympic medals. The United States of America is number one and Norway is not in the top 10. We must be doing something, right

[mactook]

Track your progress
Consistent
Identify problems and fix them

[Erik_The_Viking]

Sadly way too many parents here in the US (especially here!) forget that of their kids will never play professionally. Kids just want to enjoy sports and unfortunately parents make everything a competition. It's ridiculous - they're putting too much pressure on them and they're quitting as a result. Kick the parents out.

[sqballer]

7:03 in the video I hear a huge fart get ripped 😅