Locus of Control: Quick Coping Skill for Anxiety

Here’s a quick activity that you can do to cope with anxiety and restore a sense of safety and calm. I do it all the time with my clients in session, and you can feel a noticeable difference almost immediately. This activity is short and simple, but it can really help decrease anxiety or help you better cope with anxiety.

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Therapy in a Nutshell, LLC, and the information provided by Emma McAdam are solely intended for informational and entertainment purposes and are not a substitute for advice, diagnosis, or treatment regarding medical or mental health conditions. Although Emma McAdam is a licensed marriage and family therapist, the views expressed on this site or any related content should not be taken for medical or psychiatric advice. Always consult your physician before making any decisions related to your physical or mental health.

About Me:
I’m Emma McAdam. I’m a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and I have worked in various settings of change and growth since 2004. My experience includes juvenile corrections, adventure therapy programs, wilderness therapy programs, an eating disorder treatment center, a residential treatment center, and I currently work in an outpatient therapy clinic.

In therapy I use a combination of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Systems Theory, positive psychology, and a bio-psycho-social approach to treating mental illness and other challenges we all face in life. The ideas from my videos are frequently adapted from multiple sources. Many of them come from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, especially the work of Steven Hayes, Jason Luoma, and Russ Harris. The sections on stress and the mind-body connection derive from the work of Stephen Porges (the Polyvagal theory), Peter Levine (Somatic Experiencing) Francine Shapiro (EMDR), and Bessel Van Der Kolk. I also rely heavily on the work of the Arbinger institute for my overall understanding of our ability to choose our life's direction.

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[dodec]

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
courage to change the things I can,
and wisdom to know the difference

[johnhatherall]

I always looked a anxiety as a form of weakness and thought if I had it I would easily palm it off with mind over matter... I have never been so wrong, I was hit hard recently with an anxiety attack to the point that I thought I was having a heart attack to find out I was an anxiety attack, I now know how it feels and I would not wish it on my worse enemy I will stand by and with anyone who is going through this, there is nothing harder than fighting with your own head

[ashcat]

I’ve been dealing with really bad anxiety and depression lately and your videos are so insightful and encouraging. Please keep doing what you’re doing.

[tammywallace]

You are providing therapy at any time needed and at no cost. What a gift you provide. You are so awesome and such a blessing!! Thank you!!

[mommabear]

Very helpful
Everyone who suffers from depression and anxiety PLEASE KNOW WE GOT THIS🙏 I truly believe it and will start to be more kinder to myself ❤️

[chriscallen]

But the stuff out of my control is what I worry about. That’s the biggest struggle

[innersolutions]

Great video, Emma! We teach our clients a similar method. For anyone out there who has a hard time practicing this, it can be helpful to start yawning before you begin. When you yawn the fight-or-flight system calms down. You can induce a yawn by inhaling twice, and then slowly exhaling.

[giavalentina]

Some People r so lucky that they don't deal with anxiety, starting to think my job is bad for my health . It's so fast pacing, it makes me feel anxious and have higher anxiety even sometimes panic attacks . I wish ppl wouldn't be so mean and pressure you either .

[kmills]

Thank you for adding the pandemic in your example. For those of us struggling this is a helpful reminder of what to focus on.

[michelinefromtheblock]

Everyone who suffers from anxiety your not alone your safe!! 💓✌🏻

[itahayes]

God grant me the Serenity to Accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can and the Wisdom to know the difference. Thanks Emma, you just supplied the WISDOM.. Love your videos. 🌻

[alisondodson]

This helped me instantly. I was laying in bed getting really anxious and then I came across this video, got out of bed to do it and I feel way more clear headed. Thank you so much. ❤️

[Liesl_Cigarboxguitar]

I remember watching this video some time ago and then, true to form, I forgot all about it. Then last week I woke up in the morning and this phrase ' locus of control ' popped into my mind. It was just what I needed! One of the rare times where my subconscious mind was working along with me 😆 fantastic. Obviously I'm watching the video again and the information is just what I need right now.
Have a great day folks 🌞

[asc]

I love your content & this video in particular. It is one of your best videos ever for me personally. I really have trouble with focus & feelings of overwhelm probably because of my anxiety. By keeping this really short and to the point, I was able to focus for the entire time & learn a skill I can immediately put in to practice. Thank you so much!

[JaviSailorMau]

Hello there! It's very comforting knowing other people out there like myself. I never realized how selfish being anxious can make us. I was so worried about how I felt...and didn't think that anyone else could feel the same or worse.

[davehugstrees]

I watched this video a few weeks ago but it keeps coming to mind at times when I feel stressed by someone else's actions. It's a helpful way to focus on what you can do in a given situation and what you can't control. Thanks for the great video.

[sHiRoiTuGGeR]

I started watching your videos recently and slowly notice how my mindset is changing. Sometimes I have to remind myself and sometimes I have to struggle through my mind wanting to go back into the anxiety mode but I am already feeling a change and it's your videos that helped a lot in that progress and I can't thank you enough for doing these.

[pickelsandnickels]

That first step of writing things down really really helped, I wrote down my worries and reasons those worries wouldn’t come to be. And it gradually helped my brain realize that everyone is doing their own thing and that the whole world isn’t against me or out to get me and those who do make comments or problems are ultimately mean less because I don’t know them and they don’t know me. And it was like a weight was lifted off my shoulders, thank you!

[riotshields]

Hi Emma! Could you please make a video about breakups and everything related to heart breaks? Nostalgia, grief, obsessive thoughts? I've been struggling for more than a year 💔 but you've already help me a lot! 💐

[omalleysmith]

As a person who has anxiety, I can honestly say that just the act of drawing this locus would be enough to calm me down.