you don't need any more intimacy... you need to be alone

Do you feel like you're constantly seeking emotional connection, yet avoiding time alone with yourself? You're not alone. In this video, I talk about why you don't need more intimacy but instead need to embrace solitude in order to be secure within ourselves. If you've ever struggled with unresolved emotional trauma, attachment issues, or the fear of being alone, then this is a call for you to heal.

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0:00 Intro
1:18 The Reason Why You Struggle To Be Alone
2:22 Lack of Physical Affection & Emotional Support Growing Up
4:26 Fear of Abandonment & Distrust In Others
6:23 Using People for External Validation & Gratification
8:01 How Do We Become Comfortable Being Alone?
8:10 #1 Learn To Be Secure With Ourselves
9:37 #2 Confront and Resolve Our Traumas
11:05 #3 Disconnect From All Distractions
12:26 The Season of Isolation
13:23 Start Healing to Receive The Life You Deserve

[oscapuss]

Totally agree. Healing requires time. This advice can also be applied if you don't believe in God. Your inner child needs to spend time with your adult self. That is the relationship that needs to heal. Show up to your inner child and let him know by your actions that he will be loved, listened to and cared for. This is what communion means and the result is the true meaning of integrity - living in inner harmony.

[oliverluketaylor]

Thank you for your vulnerability 🙏🏽
~
"The inability to be alone. The restless jumping from one person to the next is a sign of something deeper. You need to recognize it's a pattern and where do most patterns come from? Trauma."

"I was selfishly using women to feel good about myself instead of treating them with respect and consideration by not leading them on."

"We all need love in our lives but if we're not comfortable with being with ourselves first then it means our traumas are not resolved."

[kymaeeeh]

ive never cried over a video before and i cried so hard

[mrbonanzagrade]

Thanks, very insightful. I can relate to your upbringing. Sometimes the loneliness is overwhelming and temptations try to draw me into doing things I shouldn't do. Chosing the right path is at times hard.

[gara]

" Start receiving the life that you deserve " Thank you

[נטעארדשטיין]

I needed to hear this. This is a real letter from god
Thank you ❤

[lowkey]

Thank you Tommy. You are blessing to everyone who will watch this. Praying for all the people out there that needs healing.

[G.Arsene]

i needed this right in this moment, i'm passing through it

[Faith-srzw]

I had a very complicated situationship with an ex who I let go of (probably for good) at the end of October. I wish he could see this video… I struggled to articulate how well I could see these issues in him. But by him discarding me was probably the start to him recognising his issues. I didn’t do anything to him but to him I was a reminder of his lustful past which was rooted in some trauma he didn’t open up about

[onyerbike]

So true regarding the ethnic point. Immigrant parents are often in survival mode and they don't have mental space or capacity to show affection. They believe that meeting basic needs is enough love.

[Bonnycutshair]

I did not expect you to hit on so many key points that resonate. I’m from an immigrant household and same childhood. Going thru many relationships and now choosing to be alone and work on my Faith. I’ve recently learned about my avoidant attachment and working on this., too. Grateful to be on my healing journey … alone! Thank you! ❤

[elaine]

Everything I needed to hear to encourage me to keep going in my healing journey is in this video. I broke down and cried. Twice. Thank you ❤

[abinayaashoken]

sir, you are god sent, i just finished crying and tearing up, i wanted to reach out to a toxic ex or rather ex s, but this one time i tried controlling and cried it out ive been isolated consciously cutting myself off from all types of people, something in me keeps saying that this is a period of sowing seeds and my harvest time will soon come when i bloom but for nowits dark coz im planted . and bam this video pops out of no where, tbh my reccomendations are about studies and all and this was a god sent video . thank you, god bless !

[mayragarcia]

I really needed to hear this. I was trying to get busy again and avoid that healing, but this brought me back to the present and told me to stay still and trust the process. If you listen carefully, there are no coincidences
THANK YOU

[jazminmoran]

I feel like I'm having an awakening. I'm shocking myself ❤ Amen! ❤

[Lil-js]

Sitting alone too much in my thoughts has left me with depression. I know myself well and am ready for love and healthy friendships and community

[lovingwithabrokenheart]

I'm supposed to do mathematics right now, but I am so tired after a long day at school with diving theory and practice, and many many days in a row doing physics and mathematics. I felt called to relax a little bit and learn a little bit about life and love instead. Some may call it procrastination, but it feels deeper than that - especially now since it allowed me to stumble across this beautiful video!

A lot of the things you mentioned have been shared with me before in bits and pieces, but the way you put this whole video together made it reach my soul. Especially the part about forgiving ourselves.

May you also forgive yourself. I can see that you speak of the lifestyle you had in the past with a heavy heart. Remember that you were just trying to survive in this harsh reality with all that you knew at the time. Now that you know better, you make better choices for yourself and others.

Don't judge your past self for getting you this far. Don't judge yourself for making the mistakes you needed to learn and let go.



Watching a man reflect on himself in this way healed something in me. Thank you

[Alicia-dnxq]

Thank you for being so vulnerable. I can relate to all you have said. Let's do the work!

[AMessenger]

Ur so cute ☺️ I just called my ex cuz I was lonely and got angry after talking to him because it just is the same circle again nd again. Thank you I need to heal❤

[RanDahiyat]

I’ve been thinking about this but couldn’t put it in the right words, thank you 🙏