Is Aphantasia Caused by Trauma?

In this video I talk about Aphantasia and whether or not it is caused by trauma.

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#autism
#actuallyautistic
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[cherry_asmr]

I remember lying in the bed when I was a child and literally counting in my head “1 sheep, 2 sheep” up to 100 while staring at the blackness behind my eyelids thinking what the heck is this supposed to be doing 😂 if only I knew then what I know now!

[MarissaGarza]

It IS just thoughts for me too! Thank you so much for sharing. It helps to hear other talk about aphantasia as I learn more and more about it for myself.

[laurenl]

Thanks for sharing! Another great video. ❤ I can’t picture sheep to fall asleep, I just have to let my mind wonder until it finally gets quiet.

[martiwilliams]

More and more self awareness each video. Thank you Amanda, for your openness and courage and to all of the courageous, open viewer insights.

[marktunnicliffe]

I have aphantasia (born with) and until watching your video I'd never actually thought about it in terms of sensory input.
I now know that i have total aphantasia.

[Marty]

Really interesting, thanks for sharing! I don’t have aphantasia but always happy to learn something new and understand what other people might be dealing with.

[risky]

Thanks for your videos.
We also have Aphantasia, but never knew what it was until hearing you talk of it. And always wondered if anyone was like us. (I tend to refer to myself as We, Us, Our)

[chrissimpson]

Sheep are relaxing animals, that's why people like to count sheep before going to bed.

[Frnchfrii]

Can't see shit up in my brain unless I'm having nightmares, but boy is it loud as fuck up in there and the hypersensitivity to tactile input extends into my somatic memory. Learning about aphantasia is also rewiring my how I view, interact with my intuition, my art, and my internal dialogue is shifting which has both relieved a lot of pressure throughout creative proccesses so I can learn to practice what I preach; and I'm always on about the its all about processes, not results. Journeys not destinations and all that crap. ❤

[alisharichards]

I'm 43 years old and I just figured out I have total aphantasia in the last 12 months. I'll get disconnected descriptive words instead of pictures. Like if I'm asked to picture an apple I'll get "green. shiny. brown stalk" etc. to be very honest, I feel completely robbed! I never understood that people can just create a beautiful place in their minds and go there at will... The fact that I can't makes me very resentful. If I could do this, I'd be in long daily meditation. I wish there was a way to fix it.

[Catlily]

I don't remember physical pain like most people. A lot of people wince when they recall something painful. I remember distantly that it hurt but not enough to be at all upset about it.

[galathoughtart]

When I was a kid I found it so difficult to conjure up a single blurry outline of a sheep I had no energy to count it! I noticed I couldn’t visualize when I was about four years old. But I do hear in my mind :)

[ArturFernandesdeSouzaFilho]

I recently discovered the condition of aphantasia, one day talking to family members, many were surprised that they also had the condition and that it wasn't "normal", so I'm sure it's something of genetic origin since many of my cousins have it. same condition.
And I cannot see anything, no shapes, no colors only emptiness, It's interesting because it's not even dark

[windalfalatar]

I am autistic and so is my son. He also has ADD. My sister has I think total aphantasia like you. Like your sister, I am pretty much the exact opposite: I get full Super HD, sound, the works. This, I think, has led to my sister being a devourer of books, whereas I am an extremely slow reader. She just takes in the information and reads the pages in a concentrated manner, whereas I visualize and try to comprehend Sentence 1 when I'm reading Sentence 2, so I don't actually register any of the words, let alone how they connect from Sentence 2, because my VRAM and overall RAM are so utterly focused on the graphics of Sentence 1. It can take me several minutes to visualize every last detail of Sentence 1, because I don't want to miss any of the goodness, but at the same time I've been told since being a child at school, that I'm reading too slowly, "Why are you taking so much time?" so I try to press on with Sentence 2 and even 3, in spite of not having played out all the tiniest details in my home movie head from Sentence 1. So even in the comfort of my own home, with no one watching me or commenting negatively, I have been so primed to neuro-typically mask that I can't allow myself the leeway and relaxation to enjoy a book my way because of the input I've got previously in life.

[Psychessin]

The only thing I can do when someone tells me to visualise sth, is concetrating really hard on it. With sheep, I can kind of remember the color of their wool and that there are white and black ones. I have to remind myself to use other senses as well. I can force myself to remember a sheep saying "bäääh", but that's it. Visually, I can recall a cartoon of a sheep really hard and blurry. But it's not at all vivid and needs a whole lot of concentration. That's the opposite of sth that's supposed to calm me down :D

[lilirose]

I'm curious how high the comorbidity is between aphantasia and ASD.

I remember when Temple Grandin released "Thinking in Pictures" and I was really annoyed that she was describing "The" autistic experience as being dramatically different to my own, and people kept recommending that dang book to me as though it would teach me more about myself!

My own experience is weird, I think almost exclusively in text. As in, I literally read my own thoughts, and that isn't a figure of speech, I "see" text in my head. However, other mental images are extremely hazy. I've never known anyone else who said the same.

[tazdragon]

I've been reading comments, so now I'm wondering: did people actually see their imaginary friends!? I clearly remember feeling envious of people that said they had imaginary friends. I really struggled with making and keeping friends until my late 20's, so I always wanted an imaginary friend. I couldn't make one, so I thought my imagination was deficient.
I definitely have visual aphantasia, but I have vivid & immersive dreams frequently.

[DavidBowman-mqbm]

I used to be able to imagine the most visual enriching things for the majority of my life. Yet lately, not at all. It has been very distressing to my mind set. I feel emptiness now mostly.

[Slim_Chiply]

I never thought about not really being able to visualize anything. I never understood things like counting sheep or guided meditation, but I didn't think too much about it until your videos came along. I mentioned it to various counselors and Drs, but seemed to not register what I was saying. I ended up at a memory clinic about 10 years ago. They said I had an Atypical Mild Cognitive Impairment and had trouble processing information into my brain. I assumed that was what caused my issues and let it go at that.

[beatlebrarian]

It is definitely work noting that in my case, my mother has Prosopagnosia. She does not have Aphantasia. I do. My family on her side has so many neurological issues from Parkinsons to Alzheimers, etc.