The decline of momfluencers || Motherhood In Progress

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#motherhoodinprogress #momfluencers #ballerinafarm #tradwife #mommyvlogger #costoflivingcrisis

[Genesis]

It’s not about shaming people for having money, it’s all about the time we are living in right now. We are living in a silent depression no one is talking about so the over consumption that we once watched, is now tone deaf to struggling families

[Starlight]

Re Ballerina Farm, there was a New York Times feature on her competing in a beauty pageant (only a couple of weeks after giving birth). In the article she said she didn’t have childcare but then said she had a full time teacher to homeschool her children, a personal assistant and multiple farm hands. Her husband’s family is worth over $400 Million. This content is NOT relatable for anyone, and people should be aware when they consume this content that this is pure fantasy.

[bettinak.]

I feel lately this whole "Youtube era" started fading. At least for me. I've been watching videos for more than a decade and I feel I have to get over it.

[redhot]

I'm also an over-preparer who spent a lot of time watching mom content. Then my baby was born with a life threatening illness and all the materialism and privilege is too glaring to be relateable anymore.

[efj]

This is one of the most relatable videos I've ever seen. Literally no one is talking about any of this! I'm a "trad wife" myself, but the most authentic version of that you could imagine lol. I have a 2 year old and one on the way. I stay home full-time with zero income of my own and one of the biggest tasks for me is figuring out how to budget groceries for the week, so that we don't overspend and dip into other bill money. I do the primary caring for the kids and home while my husband works a 9 to 5. I'm blessed to be able to do this and I willingly took on this role. However, it's freaking hard! I wish I had the time and energy to bake bread everyday, raise chickens, and put myself together with a full face of makeup and a pretty dress, but that's just not reality. There truly aren't enough hours in the day! I do the absolute best I can for my family, but it can be very stressful and exhausting at times because there's so much to keep up with and not a lot of extra money to have an outlet, such as a vacation, or spa day, or even a date night lol
The money that these wealthy influencers have definitely plays a role in their experiences as homemakers and we are definitely not the same. As much as their lives may look "simple and humble", many of them are just not. I will, however, take responsibility for looking to influencers for inspiration in my own life. Bottom line is we gotta stay in our own lane, work with what God has given us individually, and be grateful. Thank you for posting something real❤

[emeraldcoal]

Don’t get me wrong, I’m 100% on board with the homesteading and slow-living lifestyles as that’s been my goal/dream since I was 12 years old, now as a 29 yr old and 4 kids with one on the way I’ve dipped my toes in but it looks NOTHING like the prairie dress-wearing moms who are gracefully gathering the eggs and baking bread. I do all that and more but the work load is insane. Also I have no childcare, no cleaning service and my husband works night and day. Getting up before the kids to do the chores, bottle feed the calf, and haul water in the heat/cold just to make it inside to start breakfast before they eat each other isn’t Instagram worthy. And my house is nice but no where near swoon worthy as the “homesteading” influencers. How do they have money for such beautiful homes AND that acreage AND all the farm things which are SO expensive??

Don’t even get me started on the “traditional mom” who live in the suburbs. I’ve fallen down the rabbit whole watching them and their beautifully perfect lives too (although it’s in different ways) and once they start building that new 3, 000+ sqft home (which is inevitable) I have to bounce out. I have to remind myself that living on a couple acres with a family of 6+ in 1, 400sqft is what I’m really grateful for and try to forget seeing people with unlimited budget for the biggest and best because it just makes makes me feel like I’m doing it wrong.

[carolinebcollier]

There are many people (myself included) who think it has *always been crass and in bad taste to flaunt your wealth not just during widespread financial hardship.

[ShayleneReynolds]

“Even this ‘simple life’ is not one you can acheive.” You hit the nail on the head. That’s the feeling I’ve been getting with a lot of these ‘slow lifestyle’ influencers but hadn’t put it into words.

[sambrooks]

Love this but the ad for $100 greens powder is an interesting choice lol

[Jessieish]

Thank you for freaking mentioning the fact that these moms AREN’T “just” stay at home moms. They are being deeply fulfilled by what they are doing online. And if they aren’t being fulfilled, they are getting paid.
Like don’t tell me that you don’t need anything else to be happy etc etc when you’re staring at a camera chatting with me lolol

Edit to add that I also can’t stand the ones that don’t fully comprehend just how epic it is to have a work from home husband who is like clearly very available during the day. They all address how “blessed” they are, but like man idk if they get how huge it is. Suddenly that big family you have is no longer manageable if he goes back.

[savannahmcilrath]

I LOVE this new content that you've been doing recently. It's so refreshing seeing someone online that shares the frustrations & struggles of the middle class with us

[jsayssands]

As a new mom I loved watching mom content. During early morning feeding sessions when I was exhausted it felt comforting to see other moms and what they were going through. Then I noticed most of the moms I followed lived very privileged lifestyles and were constantly complaining about first world problems.
At a certain point it started to feel exploitative. Why do I need to know your child's full name and DOB? Many mom influencers are loose with personal information and it would be easy for creeps to know where they live. I've seen planner videos where they broadcast what activities their kids have with date and times. Your kids should not be content. I think some moms brush it off because they're able to afford to stay home because of vlogging. But that's wrong. They're trading their childrens' privacy for money.
When I signed my son up for school I started to think about mommy vloggers and how weird it would be to go to school or out in public and meet strangers who knew personal things about me. There are so many risks in terms of sharing your kids personal information online and no advantages. Except for money, which is wrong.

[jesswalsh]

I'm a stay at home mom and it is so hard. People online put out there that it's the most relaxing and slow and lovely life. And don't get me wrong it is amazing. It is so fulfilling and I wouldn't change it for the world. But financially it's getting harder, the kids are very young so it's a constant battle with a toddler that wants it now and a baby that needs it now, and some days my head is spinning so fast, I don't always have time to bake bread, I don't always have time to make a 3 course home cooked meal. It's hard work, it's repeat work, and to top it off there's very little adult interaction, so you drive your husband nuts talking his ear off 🤣🤣🤣 again, it's the best decision I made but I hate the momfluencers that make it look like a walk in the park.

[kaley]

One thing I’ve noticed that I can’t relate to with so many mom influencers is that many of them have husbands that work from home or work part time from home. My husband is gone from 5:00 a.m. until 4:00 p.m. and then works a second job a few days a week. I’ll wonder why I feel so alone and isolated compared to others moms and I have to remind myself that it’s just me with the kids most of the time.

[chrisfowler]

Being 56 I’m glad that I brought up my kids in a time where social media was not such a big deal because I think nowadays people are comparing themselves to the outliers not to people in their neighborhood. I only had to compare myself to people I lived around and sometimes that was hard enough so I can only imagine how I would feel especially as a new mom with so many insecurities I just saw people in my own socioeconomic condition doing what I was doing with the same struggles, messy houses etc. and I felt like I was doing OK

[anniemcgough]

And some of the influencers with other financial resources (wealthy family/partners) can also afford literal teams of people to film them, set up lighting, edit content, prep social media posts, etc., not to mention the It looks like it's just one mom doing it all but there's a giant team behind the scenes that's making this lifestyle seem attainable when that's far from reality.

[leahhartigan]

Thank you so much for this. So many people are struggling, and it’s really shown who’s tone deaf. You’re really great for speaking out on this.

[herefortheplants]

I'm not a mom but I am so tired of how monetized motherhood has become. I understand that having a child is a big event but it's annoying that once an influencer gets pregnant, they suddenly become a momfluencer. Like, I followed an influencer because I like seeing her hair tutorials and reviews and it then quickly turns into "unbox this stroller with me, link in bio!" "3 month update on baby, link in bio for all my baby recs!" I think there is definitely an over saturation of momfluencers, like just because you're an influencer doesn't mean you have to monetize your child or make content about it.

[mirandam]

I think with the way the algorithm is now it really took away that community that YouTube had in all niches. it’s really unfortunate. I think this is why we’re getting lonely and lonely.

[Sentimental-ity]

Currently, the only social media I spend time on is youtube, where I can learn to do things I want to apply in my life. I work from home raising my 3 year old while my husband works in an office. I make my own bread, and I plan to learn more about homestead, not to follow an influencer but to take care of my family. Learning new life skills comes from watching other people. So I thank the internet for that, but I don't compare and contrast. I take and produce.