Don't trust anyone blindly || New whatsapp motivational status || 30 sec

“Even in the common affairs of life, in love, friendship, and marriage, how little security have we when we trust our happiness in the hands of others!

William Hazlitt (English Philosopher & Writer)

“Men are able to trust one another, knowing the exact degree of dishonesty they are entitled to expect.”

Stephen Leacock (Canadian Author & Scientist)

“Let every eye negotiate for itself and trust no agent.”

William Shakespeare (English Poet & Playwright)

 

I had a friend for years who was a horrible influence on me.

First, he made me feel great about myself.

(I know — what a jerk.)

Second, he was a convincing leader.

He also watched out for me.

(Yep, this guy was rotten to the core.)

At first, he was a great friend.

My gut told me I could trust him, and so I did.

I followed him blindly.

And it was a lot of fun.

At first.

He was strong, charismatic, and a great communicator.

Being around him made me feel strong, charismatic, and like a great communicator.

Over time though, I started to notice that he only made me feel great about myself when I was doing what he wanted me to do.

I also noticed that he was more of a manipulative leader.

I slowly realized that he “watched out for me” by warning me to not chase my real goals because they were too risky.

But by the time I realized all of this, it was too late.

I had already become someone I didn’t want to be.

I had wasted years trying to be liked and trying to be someone else.

All because someone made me feel good enough to follow them blindly.

Why You Should Never Blindly Follow Others

Behavioural science has long established trust as an essential foundation for any interpersonal relationship.

Friendships and trust are evolutionary across species, and no relationship can exist without them.

Not trusting anyone isn’t the answer: that’s illogical and rigidly stupid.

But blindly trusting others and following them unconditionally is just as stupid.

We have romanticized the idea of unconditional love and acceptance to a level where we are making poor choices that are negatively impacting our lives.

What we’re forgetting is what social science has already picked up on: we blur the lines between familiarity and trust.

A paper out of the University of Oxford suggests that familiarity is often mistaken for trust, but where it actually differs is that it holds no risk.

Trusting what is familiar without scrutiny is always a mistake.

Look — trust involves risk.

As a result, trust is almost always uncomfortable.

In response to this discomfort, we look for someone else to respond in our best interests and to reduce that risk.

If the other person’s interests are consistently aligned with ours, trust builds.

But if their interests and our interests diverge too much, trust is broken.

Dr. John Gottman, author of The Science of Trust states that trust is not just the #1 desired quality cited in relationships, but is a key factor in making communities, states, and countries work.

His metric found that high trust scores led to positive outcomes and increased relationship stability.

Roderick Kramer wrote in Trust in Organizations that risk is weighed against the level that we trust others with the addition of an ongoing assessment of personal gain and self-interest.

What does all of this mean?

It means your goal is to protect healthy self-interest while exercising wisdom and discernment with others.

Trust, but don’t trust unconditionally.

Learn from others, but never blindly follow them.

Edited by Royal rehmaan
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“Even in the common affairs of life, in love, friendship, and marriage, how little security have we when we trust our happiness in the hands of others!