How rage overtook me | MAKEUP STORYTIME #shorts

[rationalowl]

To be fair, your anger was entirely justified, even if your actions were not. Make sure you acknowledge and care for all the feelings you feel <3

[blep]

I've heard someone say on here that "Anger is a responsive/protective emotion. It exists as a response in an attempt to keep us safe. It is our natural response to fear, sadness, being hurt, or even a sense of injustice." And I agree with them, so don't beat yourself up about it too much, and it's good you learned how to control it 👍

[jakemarie]

Swallowing all rage isn't the answer either. My abusive ex gf "never got angry" and yet everyone had to walk on eggshells around her or be stonewalled for days. I begged her to tell me what was wrong. Usually it was something small from months ago. She'd shut me out with a smile. And because she was "never angry" I wasn't allowed to show anger. I learned that repressing feelings can make misunderstandings much bigger.

[Max_]

Five grown men let their shared kitchen rot and become a cozy place for mice and you're ashamed of being angry at them? I mean, yeah, don't throw knives around, sure, but in general anger is an understandable response in this case in my opinion

[dejihuam]

I wanna take this opportunity to say that anger isn’t a “bad” emotion. There are no such things as “bad” feelings, they’re all just feelings. What matters is what you do with those feelings, how you choose to express them. Find a healthy outlet for your anger, because bottling it up and being ashamed of it will only cause you and your loved ones more harm down the line.

[aoikuma]

That’s a valid response though. They’re grown men acting like babies, they can clean up after themselves.

[strawbunni]

When your anger hurts or scares others thats when it crosses the line. But youre allowed to be angry especially when youre living in a house with a mice problem. I would be irrate if i lived with 5 people and i was the only one picking up then we get MICE?! I feel like the most challenging thing is being angry without hurting others. Anger is a healthy emotion when youre not pushing it on others. I appriciate you sharing this story, but you were definitely not the only problem in this living situation.

[tiffanytupper]

I've been repressing my rage my whole life because my mother was extremely angry and violent and I didn't want to be like her. It's destroying me from the inside out. So I have to find a way to be angry that doesn't hurt anyone and doesn't scare people, I usually just bawl until it passes but the therapist said it's not enough I need to get angry. I hate it it feels out of control and dangerous and I don't like it.😢🕯🧡💜🧡

[Polina-yewh]

Anger and rage is a part of our humanity. You had a valid reason, absolutely justified, to be angry.
Don’t be ashamed of your own emotions, don’t go even partly into toxic positivity

[christalcavanaugh]

Assuming that he wasn’t the reason the kitchen was a huge mess, his response is totally valid and understandable. Unless he was fearful for her safety, he also could have gone to a different room, but he is right about throwing knives in general. HOWEVER, all of her feelings are completely justified and conflating “don’t throw knives” with “suppress anger at all costs” is not helpful. Feel the anger, process the emotion, find a solution. Ignoring or repressing feelings doesn’t help either

[taicollins]

Anger itself isn't a bad thing. It's the emotion that lets you know something is wrong and NEEDS to be appropriately and momentarily validated. That's how that shit builds up and gets so bad to throwing knives.

[MarielWhalley]

If you dont want someone else to be angry dont make them angry... You had all the right be angry.
This idea of tabooing negative emotions just makes it worse for everyone and makes negative feelings even stronger.

[basil]

I feel like this explosive reaction is a symptom of the attitude that you are describing as well. By not allowing yourself to be angry/experience conflict, you allow the tiny bursts of anger at a small inconvenience to fester until you're able to be set off by a few utensils. I completely understand the rage and am currently in a similar roommate situation, but I just think it's important to be aware of that anger rising and open dialogues with the people causing your stife before it reaches this point

[STEELOOFFICIAL]

Remember what Inside Out said: "That's Anger. He cares very deeply about things being fair."

No bad emotions, only bad conduct. Recently been embracing anger and it is a liberating experience. Of course I have never harmed anyone or done anything severely or of line as of late because of it, but I am okay with expressing distaste for stuff and getting it fixed up. It's great, especially after years of being conditioned to be a doormat.

[fcxkuvy]

this is just as unhealthy as letting the anger explode. you can be angry without being harmful. the fact that you think anger is equivalent to harm is very sad..

[helasphinx]

That's enabling behaviour. Not holding people accountable is actually worse.

[Rachel-fisc]

Anger isn't a "bad" emotion. I genuinely believe that there isn't such a thing as a bad emotion; simply bad actions and reactions to those emotions. Anger, fear, sadness, pain... We feel them all for a reason. They reveal to us injustice, danger, the need for change.
Feeling anger doesn't automatically make you a bad person. Suppressing anger doesn't automatically make you a good person.

If you are angry and fear hurting someone, say that. "I'm too angry to deal with this fairly right now. I'm not running away. I just need time. Give me /X amount of time/." Naming what you're feeling is the first step to managing it safely.
The order of the next two things is your choice, but make time for both of them together.
1. Do something physical. Scream into a pillow. Go for a brisk walk or run. Work out. Weed the garden. Whatever. It doesn't need to be for long. 5 minutes, 10, that's all.
It helps a lot to have a routine you must complete to do the physical thing, whether that's collecting up your gear, checking your equipment, putting on sunscreen, getting a water bottle. This makes the physical thing a coping strategy, rather than mindlessly lashing out.
2. Sit with the anger. Think, say, or write down what you are feeling and why. It helps to imagine you're interviewing yourself and, in turn, giving a statement about something you saw happen to something else. This will stop you getting stuck in a spiral and making yourself madder.
If it's applicable, draft what you want to say to the cause of your anger; I strongly suggest looking up the acronym DEAR MAN structure. It's a really good road map for discussing conflict. Write Draft One, and then go do something else - maybe your physical activity - and then return and rewrite.

It seems like a lot, and it is, but anger is powerful. It is a potent fuel. Use it wisely.

[Akrina-ylbu]

Suppressing that feeling leads to lashing out, and learning how to express it in a not harmful way is important but you had a reason to be mad they crossed your boundary. I also always wonder why we tend to portray anger as a bad emotion and expressing it is seen as being not a good person. But also let's be realistic five grown men not being able to clean up after themselves is ridiculous, I wouldn't stay with them and just walk away . But it's just me

[Brynna-mj]

Tbh I wouldn’t have listened to him. Those boys expected YOU to do THEIR dirty work. I would be just as angry.

[karanhdream]

Anger is a valid and legit emotion. It's no excuse to violence or abuse, but everyone feels it every now and then. What matters is how we express it, what we do with it and we deal with it.