Self Actualization : Chose Your Source Of Happiness

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Self Actualization : Chose Your Source Of Happiness

Nearly everyone who is a well-functioning member of society works and runs and essentially lives for happiness, and that too of the ephemeral kind, which stays one moment and is gone the next.

At this point, we would do well to clarify that everything anyone ever does in life is for happiness of some form. We spend years creating structure, trying to arrange things cogently for our happiness.

What we fail to understand, though, is that this arrangement is never-ending! Even Maslow’s pyramid says the bottommost rung of physiological needs and security needs is never really satisfied.

Our aim should be to start from the top of Maslow’s pyramid, that is self-actualization, and begin to understand the deeper undercurrent of desire and attachment, and why everything we hold as important in life should actually be understood better.

Note: Maslow's hierarchy of needs is most often displayed as a pyramid. The lowest levels of the pyramid are made up of the most basic needs, while the most complex needs are at the top of the pyramid. Needs at the bottom of the pyramid are basic physical requirements including the need for food, water, sleep, and warmth. Psychologist Abraham Maslow stated that human motivation is based on people seeking fulfilment and change through personal growth. His hierarchy of needs states that five categories of human needs dictate an individual's behavior. Those needs are physiological, safety, love and belonging, esteem, and self-actualization.

The level of expectations is high in today’s world, and we tie our happiness to the outcome of each of those with an AND logic gate! If even a single one fails to live up to the billing, we feel miserable.

For example, our morning coffee must come at the ‘right’ time, by the ‘right’ person, who is smiling in the ‘right’ way, speaking in the ‘right’ tone and must be of the ‘right’ temperature. One can very easily imagine how the day would be affected if even one of these was not up to our standards.

With the knowledge that this attachment or insistence gets us nowhere, we should look to practice independence from the results of things. Desire is a powerful tool and far too subtle to conquer easily. This conquest can only come through constant training of the mind to look away from distractions and to understand the impermanent nature of the happiness the desired object or person will produce.

The palpable solution is to break our attachment. The concept of detachment terrifies us at times, but the truth is that it’s not as frightening as it sounds. When we detach from something (or someone), we don’t entirely let go.

When we detach from someone, we stop expecting so much from them. Also, our happiness becomes authentic. Instead of looking outside ourselves to complete our happiness, we understand that we are already complete and can achieve full happiness on our own. Any happiness coming from the outside is merely an addition to our already existent happiness — but it’s not dependent on the absence or presence of the object or person.

What can you lose if you have nothing to lose?

#selfactualization #maslow #happiness