Why Shrek the Third is a Cinematic Disaster

This Shrek is Dreck

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Philip Sloan
Did You Fart

[whatever_it_can_be]

Shrek 2: What I think I'm writing
Shrek 3: What I'm actually writing

[thatonefool]

Literally the only joke i laughed at was this one:
Shrek: "well, somebody better be dying!"
King Harold: "I'm dying"

[-bitsarda]

I wont lie, that shot of Prince Charming riding through the forest on a horse, only for the camera to zoom out and reveal that he's actually pretending to ride a stick with a horse head in front of scrolling screen always gets a chuckle out of me

[Fppiq]

Apart from the Pinocchio lying scene, a scene I also find funny (kinda) is when Charming’s practising for killing Shrek. He’s just killing people in Shrek suits and hearing them grunt when they die is always a nice detail. I also love Charming’s frustration during his practise. Most of the time it gets a chuckle from me.

[luismontelongo]

Best quote in shrek movie
“ Ahem. This is like totally embarrassing, but my friend Tiffany thinkest thou vex her so soothly and she thought perchance thou would want to ask her to the homecoming dance or something.”

[Mushroom_Man]

I feel like it would have gone down better if they decided to have Prince Charming become hardened and cruel by the death of his mother, instead of keeping him as a pathetic loser. Think about it, he’s lost *everything*. His love interest, his destiny, his own family, everything is gone. He should have become something sinister, maybe personally scarring up his face as a way to denounce his name, thinking it no longer befits him. He pours all waking moments into becoming the head of the fairytale badguys with force.

When he seizes far far away, he doesn’t want to rule it, he wants to destroy it. He wants to render the kingdom that ruined his life asunder, and he wants Shrek there to witness it all. Then, and only then, would he want to kill Shrek. Knowing the ogre has felt a meagre amount of the pain he had felt. And after it was all said and done, he’d look up into the night sky and whisper, his voice raspy from smoke inhalation and ceaseless battle. “for you... mommy.”

[tiergas]

The only scene that I liked was when Prince Charming is asking Pinocchio where Shrek is because he can't lie. So Pinocchio tells the truth but gives long winded nothing answers. That got genuine laughs out of me. Everything else no

[collegechair]

I never understood how it was a plan to send Shrek to a high school unannounced and to just pick up some kid and take him home. Wouldn't they send the same people with the trumpets that collected Shrek and Fiona?

[PeeperSnail]

How to make Shrek's fear of kids actually good:
Make it a fear of him letting down his children. Like instead of the avalanche of babies, make the dream about seeing his potential kid grow up, and one way or another have him fail them in some manner. Maybe he doesn't know how to treat children well, so his kid grows up to dislike him. Or maybe he fails to protect them in one way or another. It would ride along his general insecurity of not being good enough compared to the good things he has in life.

[Kumaclaws]

They could have done so much more with Shrek being afraid of being a father. What if he's afraid that his children are going to be hunted down or lynched by people who hate ogres? What if he's still used to being feared so he assumes that his children are going to hate him? What if he's worried that his children are going to be alienated from how he grew up because they're royalty/celebrity children? But none of that is even considered, instead it's just
Baby flood

[jenvanfleet]

Shrek: leaning to love others
Shrek 2: learning to love yourself
Shrek 3: …
Shrek 4: learning to love what you have

[frenchfriesfan]

My father legit thought Shrek Forever After was the third Shrek movie.
I wish he was right.

[cynicat]

The worst part is that this movie does have some genuinely good humour, and dialogue, there's clearly SOME talent behind it. It feels like there's one good writer getting drowned out by a bunch of terrible ones.

[JR-kjpx]

Also why the f can't Fiona's mother rule the kingdom after the King's death? She ruled with him for decades and she's more reasonable than he ever was. But no, let's go fetch an inexperienced kid instead...

[heyseamonkey]

This movie is a dumpster fire but there are two scenes that did get a chuckle out of me:

Arthur: "And Gwen, oh Gwen, I've always loved you."
Gwen: "Ew."

And

Arthur: "Somebody help me! I've been kidnapped by a monster trying to relate to me!"

[ECLE]

"Help! Somebody help! I've been kidnapped by a monster that's trying to relate to me!"

Not gonna lie, that got a big laugh outta me

[vontavius]

Shrek endgames:

*Shrek:* flying on the back of a dragon in an attempt to stop a wedding before it's too late.

*Shrek 2:* breaking into a castle using a giant gingerbread man while Jennifer Saunders sings a excellent cover of Holding Out for a Hero.

*Shrek The Third:* Prince Charming ruining opera.

*Shrek Forever After:* Donkey and Puss leading a army of orges into battle to save Shrek and Fiona and stop Rumplestiltskin.

...one of these is not like the others

[PureBeauty]

This movie would've been dope if Shrek had some flashbacks to his childhood to give him anxiety about having his own children. Just in general I wish this movie took his fears more seriously. I think it would've greatly improved it.

[FindingNe]

When I was a kid that DADA scene cracked me up 😂 kind of still does

[FlyingMonkey]

When my daughter was in eighth grade, her middle school drama department did Shrek the Musical Junior. She was Donkey. She and the kid that played Farquaad were hilarious.