Therapist Reacts To: I Hate It Here by Taylor Swift *this one was surprising and a doozy*

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In this video, I react and analyze the lyrics to I Hate It Here by Taylor Swift. There are many possible mental health themes and interpretations, this is just my take, but I’m sure you each will have a special connection to it. It’s very powerful and makes me have so much compassion. Love you all!

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NOT LEGAL/MEDICAL ADVICE: This video is made solely for the purpose of commentary for entertainment and educational purposes, and no therapist -client relationship is created through comments or interaction with this channel. My reactions are my own personal reactions, which I am entitled to have. I am not communicating a diagnosis of any person in this video as no one in this video is my client and I am not assessing them.

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[taylorpeterson]

One connection some have made, “I will go to secret gardens”, folklore and evermore, “I will go to lunar valleys” midnights. She hates it here so she throws herself into her work.

[missawndr]

You should check out the mashup she did for this song with The Lakes on the eras tour, not necessarily for a reaction but for yourself, it's absolutely stunning

[TheAnastyB]

She’s so brave for releasing this song, it’s so raw and dark and very relatable. We need a planet where only the gentle ones can find peace and quiet.

I think she might even be talking about her relationship and her life after 1989, she was so successful to then locking herself inside and feeling worthless (that clip from her documentary alone where she’s crying…)
Then realising that this is not what she was dreaming about and imagining as a child, nobody prepared her for the harsh reality of music industry and fame.

Makes me think of “Marjorie” and how she regrets not asking her grandmother who was an opera singer “how to be”…

[sofcarolq]

I will never forgive the internet for taking lyrics from this song out of context to make it seem lame or shallow. As an afab person who is both autistic and adhd it immediately made sense to me and brought me to tears. Getting lost in my mind and even making up bad scenarios where i came out on top was the only place i had any control as a child/ teenager. To this day it's something i struggle with- using dissociation as a coping mechanism. Another great vid, Mere 🤍

[Graysworld]

The first time I heard this song I absolutely burst into tears because it was the most any of her songs had ever truly punched me in the gut in terms of grounding me in reality. I am currently at a place in my life where If I spend too much time thinking about my reality I just wanna throw up, curl into a ball on the floor, and cry, and when I heard this song for the first time I couldn't listen to it for weeks afterward because of how real it was to me. At the time the idea that someone like Taylor Swift could feel so similarly to me about life was incomprehensible.
Now It's one of my favorites on the album, and I'm so glad you finally reacted to it!!! I've been patiently waiting for it since you reacted to "chloe or sam or sophia or marcus" so Thank You!

[Atomidnights]

Over the past few days I've been thinking a lot about what is it about her songs that attracts me so much, and with this one I think I finally understand... somehow it's a relief to know that you're not the only one who feels this way, even if from the outside it seems like you have it all figured out. But in reality you don't know how to escape into your own world faster.
I can’t wait for you to listen to “I can fix him(No really I can)”. I have a feeling you’re going to love it so much.

[emmavink]

"My eternal consolation prize" IMMEDIATELY made me think of "Once your queen had come, you treat her like an ALSO-RAN" from The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived.

I think the gist of the song as a whole is that she hates being in the space again when a relationship has ended... But particularly when her relationship with Healy ended so viciously on his part, and Taylor is then left to the mercy of public opinion yet again.

She feels the only place she can really be herself and really escape is in her songwriting and in her imagination.

I think she's also carrying through that metaphor exactly from The Lakes and from a song like Clara Bow and The Lucky One that she often touches on in her music that she really hates being the butt of public jokes and baseless speculation against her.

It makes her feel worthless. Everyone that doesn't know her thinking they can say whatever they want to about her. Both from haters and toxic fans sides.

I think this is yet another song on the album that hints that at the VERY LEAST, Taylor is seriously planning on taking a break from the industry.

[laura.b.]

Where’s my maladaptive daydreaming / dissociating crew at?! That’s exactly what this song made me think about. This bridge and chorus ❤️ As a 34 yr old who still doesn’t have an autism/ADHD diagnosis I’ve definitely learnt to do this. My parents wouldn’t listen to my needs as a child (e.g. saying “I can’t go out today”) so, without having the language to explain I was overwhelmed or having sensory issues, I was forced to be in situations I didn’t want to be in. I’d escape to other worlds in my mind where I was a different person or in a different place and took a lot of comfort in music. Still as an adult I use music to shut out thoughts / social situations / reality when it’s too difficult! Because this place made me feel worthless & way up there, I actually love it 😭

[joanheld]

Just turned it on.. YOU LOOK BRIGHT AND SO PRETTY TODAY !! Self care!! You are your worst enemy.. listen to your followers ❤❤You’re a big influencer on you tube!! ❤love, Joanie

[catharineerwin]

I think she is referencing The Secret Garden by Frances Hodgson Burnett published in 1911. I was a shy, introverted book worm as a child and this was one of my very favorites. I can still picture the drawing on the cover .

[FishareFriendsNotFood]

13:00 I love how self reflective Taylor is here, I also agree the song is basically her talking to herself. She's considered an extremely nostalgic artist, so her admitting that one can over dose on nostalgia and there needs to be a balance between idealism, escapism and confronting reality is very vulnerable and mature. This is a song I point to when I want to show Taylor can be everyone; who can't relate to being a nostalgic dreamer sometimes?

[emc]

YAYYY!! I have been waiting for this one - it is a favorite of mine, it is so dark but also so beautiful and melodically whimsical. also one of my favorite books was the secret garden growing up and i would watch the 90s movie on repeat on vhs haha

[Swiftie]

This is one of my favourites
As someone with C-PTSD and extreme anxiety and depression
I definitely hate it here
Unfortunately my inner life is where I live

[maddyf]

It kind of sparks a similarity of a "precocious child" stopping their feet and saying "I hate it here." Often times maladaptive day-dreaming starts as a coping mechanism in early years. Like, a child experiencing loneliness and even prolonged loneliness might make up a friend. Which ties into Seven, and the bridge of Mastermind, and The Bolter. Cuz she never grew up 😢

[itsbrookeok]

when i first heard this song, i immediately started crying because i don’t think i’ve ever related to a song more in my life.

i’ve always been a person who’s been very behind in the stages of life. i’m 19 years old and just becoming an adult and have no idea what i want to do in life and how to go about it.

i’ve always been more into the arts, and i’m a very artistic person. i’ve always been the daydreamer, the one with her head always in the clouds, the one with unrealistic aspirations.

it’s hard being the person who wants to go into the arts in a world that’s so heavy on getting jobs where you’re able to get the money you need to be able to live in this world, but you can’t be the one in charge of doing your own thing, let alone enjoy what you’re doing.

so since i was young, i was always dreaming about doing things that aren't easy to be able to make a living for yourself, and so, now, becoming an adult, reality hits you like a bus, and my response is to just escape into those secret gardens and lunar valleys in my mind and dream that maybe one day i'll actually be able to do what i want to do with my life.

i've never felt like i fit in in this world, and i’ve always been the one to never know what’s going on in reality (like issues that happen in the world and in society) because i don’t want to know about it, i don’t want to face reality and actually live in it, and so it's just easier to just make up my own reality, my own happy world where everything is all sunshine and rainbows, and pretend i'm truly living in it and pretend that, one day, everything will magically be okay and work out for me.

[Blake]

I struggle with maladaptive daydreaming (to the point where it interferes with my daily life) I Hate It Here and I Look In People’s Window are my favorite songs on this album. They make me feel so seen😭

[cinnamontoastbread]

Seeing Mere being happy for almost reaching 60k subs less than a month ago and now having almost 75k is amazing and great to see! Finally people are waking up to these genius YouTubers that have such a big heart❤️

[mimstarkgaryen]

this is my favorite song in the whole album, it ressonates with my the lakes/evermore heart and how she dreams of escapism and not having a physical comfort place and getting lost in my mind because all the rest sounds dangerous, suffocating and stressful…love your videos, mer, after winning a fight against cancer you just feel like there’s nothing you can do to actually feel safe because dangers might come from your very own body, so sometimes only my mind comforted me with my dreams and fantasy that I knew I might never get to do and live but the “hope of it all” feels comforting…

[yvetterodriguez]

The first time I heard it I cried. It had a darker meaning for me and it saddened me to hear someone feel this way. I'm glad you touched upon it towards the end of your reaction cuz my first initial thought was about having those thoughts of not wanting to exist in this world anymore.

The mention of constantly dreaming of escaping in her mind and not wanting to deal with what's going on in the world or if it's whatever life situation she's in, she just doesn't like it. She's lonely and bitter.

And I just picked up on how the song starts and ends with her telling someone, "Quick! Quick! Tell me something awful. Like, you're a poet trapped inside the body of a finance guy".

In the middle of how it starts and how it ends, she tells us how she escapes to her mind. The fantasy. The beginning and the ending of that song grounds her back to reality. To me, it sounds like she's begging someone to tell her about themselves so that she can think about their life and not deal with her own life. Again, she's escaping cuz she's lonely and bitter with the life she has. So hearing about someone else's life is another form of escapism and comfort.

It's like how they say being in someone else's shoes but in the form of living vicariously through them to have another perspective on life. And yet, she goes back to daydreaming about the life of the person she's speaking with. It's interesting and yet exhausting lol. And Taylor has said she does talk to her friends/family and tries to catch up with what's been going on in their life when she's been away working. Sometimes this is where she gets the inspiration to write songs. Some of her songs are written about the people in her life and from their perspective. But it did worry me hearing this song on initial listen.

❤ and ✌

[SarahInsideHerFantasy]

For me this song is very much about fantasising about a dream world where all the violence, mean people and wars of this world doesn't exist (current example: the planned terror attack at the concerts in vienna) and in my mind it's strongly linked to The Lakes and Sweet Nothings because you just want to a peacefull kind of cottagecore life without any violence or bad/mean people and without stress caused by the society. I love the trilogy of these songs and relate a lot from time to time🙆🏽‍♀️