Let’s talk about Autism and Gender Identity

The highlights of the discussion will premiere tomorrow at 8:30am Melbourne and the full length interview will premiere at 8:45am Melbourne.

See you in the live chat!

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👋Welcome to Autism From The Inside!!!

If you're autistic or think you or someone you love might be on the autism spectrum, this channel is for you!
I'm Paul Micallef, and I discovered my own autism at age 30.

Yes, I know, I don't look autistic. That's exactly why I started this channel in the first place because if I didn't show you, you would never know.

Autism affects many (if not all!) aspects of our lives, so on this channel, I want to show you what Autism looks like in real people and give you some insight into what's happening for us on the inside. We'll break down myths and misconceptions, discuss how to embrace autism and live well, and share what it's like to be an autistic person.

Join me as I share what I've found along my journey, so you don't have to learn it the hard way.

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Peace,

~ Paul

#autism #asd #autismawareness

[garypoole]

It’s a fascinating, if perhaps natural, result of many struggles a neurodivergent person might have. How on earth are you going to easily recognise gender or sexuality differences or feelings in yourself if you struggle to even connect with your own emotions or understand gender roles and interactions with others in the first place.

It’s also probably challenging for some people when you get this sense of just ‘something isn’t right’ and there’s not always one perfect answer to search for as a resolution, there may be many!

[swordseye]

I'm just gonna label myself gender neutral and say I don't give a damn if you're male or female or what interests you. I definitely don't feel right being called female but then again I definitely don't feel like I belong on this planet on the first place. The whole world is insane and there's no place I feel i can fit but then again that's the point. I am who I am do not judge me for being different from you because you're not the same as your best friend or that random guy over there. Stereotypes shouldn't exist and everyone deserves a chance of being understood

[thinecuprunnethoverwithblood]

My gf and I are both trans, queer, and autistic individuals who spent a large part of our lives in denial or simply not being allowed to be ourselves (as individuals, but also as a couple) due to having extremely rough childhoods. Her coming out as transfemme was a huge turning point in my own journey towards expressing who I was (transmasc) because I'd never understood someone's feelings about their gender so deeply, and she was someone I could very comfortably talk to about being born intersex. Some people may find the dynamics of our relationship to be uncomfortable or unconventional, but I love the life we're making for ourselves and our chosen family because it's what we always needed and deserved while growing up.

Honestly, it saddens me to see so many other neurodivergent people struggling to find or express their own personal authenticity due to a lack of safety or accessibility. We all deserve to feel seen and supported, though autistic+queer folks in particular are still targets of massive vitriol and ostracization in many countries and cultures.

[SylviaRustyFae]

I feel with that first person so very strongly as someone in a very nonconventional relationship myself. There are many aspects of my relationship with my fiance (he/they) and metamour (they) that many ppl simply wont understand, and will take as weird

Its a relationship that works for us, even down to there bein three of us; but also down to the more parental seemin aspects of the relationship on his part towards me... And oh yeah, just our queerness in general around the relationship and the fact all three of us are boobed and bearded xD

Its what works for us and we cudnt be happier than in this relationship as we are; and we're so happy for the communities thatve helped us to see we can exist happily as we do :3

[HelloWorld-lvwe]

“Queer” seems like a political/philosophical identity characterized by a general opposition to social norms. It’s distinct from trans and nonbinary, which are identities that defy gender norms without necessarily opposing the existence of norms.

[rayhimmel]

audhd nonbinary couple here! lgbt and especially the "t" part of it is literally flooded with neurodivergent and we love it

[nirriii]

I wish all the strength to everyone here💪🫶💖 f the haters, we are awesome!

[berrysnowyboy]

In quarantine, it was pointed out to me that I wasn't cis as an Autistic transmasc guy of his own genders by ex-friends on Discord (since I become more and more discomnected with being a woman/girl the older I became, and I still subconsciously mask as an Autistic man and masc). I'm glad that my ex-friends (who were also neurodivergent, trans and queer) on Discord did point out to me that I am not cis and that I get bristled at feminine terms like someone (the person went by fae/faer) did as fae rightfully said that I bristle at "sister" like fae did.


From my personal and limited perspective: I masked a shitload when I used to perceive myself as a girl and woman while I am still Autistic (and I hated the shit expected of me like the laser facial and body hair removal, but I was indifferent and neutral with dresses, skirts and makeup), and the older I got, the more disconnected and detached I became. Hell, when I began exploring myself in quarantine when my parents still saw me as my deadname and dead gender, I found that I liked they/them first besides she/her, then I dropped the she/her pronouns, then included he/him and neopronouns like xe/xem. As for names and genders... I started off with my deadname and as demigirl and demicis, then demifluid, deminonbinary, demiboy, demigirl, demiflux, cassflux, etc. and now transmasc, trans male, trans man, genderfaun (genderfluid, but more masc leaning), genderlost, autigender, agender and/or multigender. I also started off as my main name, Raven, and then collected a lot of names.

I still keep my main name but I have loads of names and pronouns.


When I grew up a girl/woman, there was a lot of social conventions and unspoken rules I could never fit in, no matter how much I tried while being socially rejected by my peers for being who I am. I also hated the bra thing because bras were really uncomfy and I ironically wanted to have breasts back then as a child (but now I'm still waiting for my top surgery to happen next year)... Now I hate them.

TW: discussions of DFAB (designated female at birth) bodily functions

I used to be somewhat positive but mostly neutral about periods, but now I hate them because of how dysphoric they make ke feel and how much I feel less like myself and more like my deadname and dead gender.

So yeah, as much as I do not want to overshare too much, but the additional summary is that my parents used to be transphobic, but they mostly came around while they and I have long ways to go, and I no longer speak to my now bio older sibling because they chose their transphobia, sanism and ableism towards me, including them trying to instill bigotry (i.e., racism) into me, and them choosing their public image and conservative beliefs over being an unconditionally supportive and loving sibling.


-Raven (He/They+)

[cyndijohnson]

I’m autistic, in my 40s, don’t hyperfixate on gender, that’s a rabbit hole not worth going down. Just be a person- whatever that means to you -without the obsession with the labels

[oliverhawthorne]

I'm convinced that, to a significant extent, the LGBT movement is disproportionately composed of autists (many of whom may not even know that they are autists). Autism can interfere with normal gender identity and sexual orientation development. We need to investigate more about the links between autism and gender identity and sexual orientation. Perhaps autists would be better off realizing that their sexuality may be off because they're autistic and therefore the best word to define their sexuality is not some pre-given term supplied by some movement, but 'autistic'. The sexuality of autists is autistic. That is its own category.