Strange Swedish Cultural Tradition Sets The Online World Ablaze

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"If you have been keeping up with Twitter, you know people are really, really mad at Sweden. A screenshot of a Reddit post that recently went viral had someone describing their experience of visiting their friend’s home in Sweden, where they were asked to wait in a room while their friend’s family finished their dinner. This screenshot eventually made its way to Twitter, where non-Swedish people – particularly Asians – lost their minds.

So, why do Swedish people not want to feed their guests? Or their kid’s friends who’ve come over to play? Apparently, in Nordic cultures, hospitality was the duty of people with higher status. “So, hospitality not only brought honour to the giver, it had the potential to bring shame to the recipient,” wrote one Twitter user. An old map made by Instagram user @LoverOfGeography surfaced which says where in Europe you’re most and least likely to be offered food if you’re a guest."

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[nunyabiz]

Swede here!! This is NOT a tradition in Sweden. My mother tried to fatten everyone up.

[myeyeswentdeaf]

I’m an Irishman born and raised in a Black neighborhood in Brooklyn NY, 40+ years and still here. It’s mostly West Indians in my neighborhood. I gotta tell ya Irish people food is F’ing bland as F! It’s boiled everything, meat, vegetables, whatever, and salt is the only spice you’ll get. I come from a people who were nearly completely wiped out just because there were no potatoes to eat. Lol. Ireland is basically an island and we never even thought of eating fish. Lol. (Sry, just a little Irish humor, the Irish Potato Famine was no joke) But I remember as a kid I used to LOVE eating at my Jamaican, Haitian and Trini friends houses. I always loved Black American food too, like Soul Food, but West Indian food really did it for me. I always went to their houses after school and for sleep overs. Still to this day West Indian food is food comfort food to me. I still go to Haitian restaurants and order in Creole. Ive never been to someone else’s house of any race, ethnicity, or culture that didn’t heap their food on my plate and get joy outta watching me enjoy their kinda food, but then again I’ve never been to a Swiss persons house. Lol.

[jimmytam]

And the other explanation is dumb too. "We don't want to insult you as if you can't afford to feed yourself." This tradition was probably started by a cheapskate as an excuse not to feed you. Ridiculous.

[zirn]

Growing up in Sweden (33yo) I remember it like this. When you were a small child playing with the neighbour kids everyone went home at dinner time. Or if you had friends from kindergarden/school you would have small snack meals and before dinner the parents would come pick up their kid. Sleepovers ofc everyone was getting food both dinner and breakfast.
When you were 12+ you would be getting dinner if you were planning on staying a lot longer after dinner (on weekends) and it was just you. If it was loads of friends they were expected to go home and eat. I remember we were often big groups of friends hanging out in the same house quite often. That would have been crazy having to feed 6 teenagers extra everyday. Same thing here with sleepovers, you were fed. Also planned playdates you were fed.

[davidwild]

I'm Australian, so I do find this Swedish behaviour odd, but not as odd as dozens of mass shootings every year and zero gun control in response.

[RoccosVideos]

I remember in high school and my friends step mom did this to me. My late mother used to feed everyone. It was very strange to me. We’re all American so I’m not sure where it came from.

[ZarlanTheGreen]

Most people here in Sweden, are *_EQUALLY BAFFLED_* by this SwedenGate-story, and are shocked to hear, that this is actually a genuine old tradition/practice, among *_some_* Swedish families. There are plenty of people here, who have never even *_heard_* of this, much less experienced or practice it.

[SpaceForceCommander]

Similarly, the Chinese think loudly slurping noodles from a bowl of soup is rude, while the Japanese think eating the same thing quietly show a lack of enjoyment and respect for the cook!

[Wolit]

My grandparents came from a Swedish speaking part of Finland. Guests were always offered coffee and cookies or something. We didn't really have friends over for dinner. When it was dinner time, it was expected that our friends would go home.

[sjenkins]

I can understand not wanting to ruin dinner plans, sure, but that kid was _spending the night!_ Did they expect him to just walk home in the middle of the night for dinner? Pop out for a quick breakfast and be back in time for Saturday morning cartoons?

[izaurasali]

I’m from Sweden. Most people I’ve visited would ask if I wanted to eat with them. But when I was a kid just hanging out with friends after school they sometimes didn’t. Often they don’t expect visitors to want to eat, cause they have a meal planned for when they get home. We usually don’t make eating meals a social event when it’s not a pre-planned dinner party. Also, I suppose we can be a bit picky, have different diets etc.

[ElinRenacool]

I have live in Sweden my entirer life and have never seen or heard of this happening. So I don't think this is a tradition.

[EnderSword]

I'm with JR here, I hate eating at other people's houses and feeling pressure to eat their stuff or offend them

[rogerbrand]

I'd probably prefer to not get fed in Sweden to having my head blown off in America.

[Trillykins]

The internet really needs to stop believing everything they read on Reddit.

[dinkoz]

I'm from Mediterranean, in the EU, with a strong tradition of feeding guests "by force", that is, you put so much food in front of them that they end up in a food coma. Guests, on the other hand, cannot refuse food because it is considered an insult to the host. Now, for the last decade, I have absolutely refused to feed my children's friends (now 17F and 14M) when they visit us or stay overnight after two cases of an allergic reaction to food, one of which ended up in the emergency room. It turns out that every third child is allergic to something in food. The problem is sociological in our country due to the pressure of society not to say that children are allergic, or how they see it as "sick", so that some parents do not admit to themselves or "do not believe in allergies" that their children are allergic to certain foods and they risk their lives. So I no longer allow my own to feed other people's children.

[stigrynning]

As a Norwegian, I don't think this is a Swedish custom. It may have happened, but it's not a custom.

[AJ-xmxc]

The entire continent of Asia looks on in horror.

[mats]

In my experience as 40 year old from Sweden this is completely wrong. Guests are always offered to join dinner. Are there some people not doing that? Sure, but those are outliers.

[NothingIsKnown]

I am Swedish. We always offer visiting kids food and our kids friends do it for our kids.