13 Ways To Connect with Emotion Safely if Feeling Numb or Dissociated

How to start feeling emotions again if numb or dissociated.

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Dr. David Maloney is a Psychologist and therapist. His has trained in a variety of techniques (person-centered, Gestalt, ACIM, psychodynamic) and works with people on a wide variety of issues. His main areas of expertise are in self-esteem, motivation, and relationships.

[drdavidmaloneypsychotherapy]

Hi all. Here are the 13 tips in the video...
1. Accept that a part of you won’t want to do this. Be patient with yourself.
2. Prioritize self-care and fun in your life. Create an experience of what love feels like (self-parenting).
3. Breathing exercises. Holotropic breathwork. Changes focus from external to internal. It anchors the focus.
4. Feel the numbness.
5. Allow (embrace) frustration and mild anxiety.
6. Embrace ‘giving up’. Then, relax into surrender.
7. Place your hands on any part of your body in which something emotional moves.
8. Let music teach you. Listen to it often.
9. Embrace all emotions just as they are (change nothing).
10. Prioritize inter-personal relationships as well as alone time.
11. Realize we are not trying to fix the pain – only to connect with it.
12. Don’t over analyze the roots of your trauma – it’s often way more complicated than imaginable.
13. Remain mindful of the underlying trauma. See this as an ongoing need to attend to your emotional body.

[isabelle]

" trust that once you want to reconnect with yourself, it will happen "

[angelmossucco]

❤it’s not about (constantly) feeling good; it’s about how good we are at feeling.

[glendapedo]

Hearing this explained, helps me feel a little normal. I've become so disconnected and for years haven't been able to pinpoint what's going on. Thank you

[NikKi-pshb]

My mother is a covert narcissist who turned extremely verbally abusive towards me a few months ago, and at the same time I discovered I was being cheated on by the father of my newborn child, a man I loved very deeply. I haven’t been able to truly process my emotions since then. I’ve never felt this way before, I’ve always been incredibly emotionally expressive. I feel so blocked. My heart is broken but all that emotion is just trapped inside.

[TanyaStolt]

This is the best video I have came across on the subject, hands down. Finally someone is talking about this and taking the mystery and hopelessness out of my experience. Giving me all of these tips on how to heal on top of explaining it is not a void but a thing, wow! Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

[ChocolateVodka]

Patience, safety, self care and good health, being there for yourself, and avoid caffeine

[JamieAmos]

Thank you so much for this video. I've been emotionally numb for almost 8 years now following a particularly painful + traumatic relationship in addition to a prolonged period of extreme stress. As an actor, it has been extremely difficult dealing with this, as I need to be able to access my emotions - so it's been a cycle of being numb, not doing good work because I'm unable to access the emotions, to feeling bad about myself for that, etc. etc. I've been in therapy consistently for a year and am really committing to the healing process now, and while some extremely painful emotions are coming up, I'm welcoming them as I'm excited to be feeling them again. I want to do a better job of showing myself compassion for taking so long to start the healing journey - I just wasn't ready.

[avertingapathy]

Thanks for these again. These are normal reactions to prolonged stress, instability, trauma (past and present). Most would be shuffled off with a pill by a psychiatrist or be diagnosed with some kind of mood disorder and put on a course of medication which may not be sustainable and mostly doesn't help at least from looking at experiences of dp/dr people online. I developed mine around a needy parent who operated in this mode for most of her life. Having to rely on her during the pandemic resurfaced a ton of this stuff. It's basically a feeling in solarplexus of anxiety, loneliness but feeling boxed in by circumstances and now an anxiously attached smothering elderly parent that is on track for early stages of dementia it seems triggering this neediness she had all her life and didn't express and probably blaming me for her role as a martyr. Becoming dismissive to get away emotionally has been traumatic. Some family doesn't want to let go because after growing up in multi generational household they feel entitled to hold on. It's just tough operating this way in the world. All my life I had to be the mature dissociated adult son when I needed support. And now by virtue of loneliness they want more of the same. Well, no more. I'm not going to say they are narcissistic which I thought earlier. They are definitely an always have been dissociated. Blame cold upbringing, generational personal trauma. I just hate feeling like I don't exist because I stuffed so many emotions recently. Like a balloon around my heart. This protective hopelessness helps to numb out. Sorry for the rant. It's just good to see someone getting under it in a way that sounds intuitive.

[karenconstantine]

Omg … yess music never fails ever to lift me up and depending on what kind of music, I can actually cry…

[Filthy_Goblin_]

Glad i found you man. Im sick of these youtubers who are just paraphrasing the dsm on this stuff. Youve actually been through it and you are an actual professional. Im dealing with un processed trauma from childhood and i feel like im in a rut between wanting to feel again but its hard for me to deal with the pain that arises. As soon as it bubbles up and i become dissociated; all logic goes out the window and i want to resist it and not feel it and it takes real focus to accept it for what it is and allow it to be. Such an interesting thing the body will do from past traumatic events. All i want to do is live my life as i am and feel openly what the world has to offer. I know deep down i like who i am but its tough with all of these roadblocks stopping me from achieving that. Looking forward to listening to more of your videos

[padelx]

I am so tired of feeling this way but I am even more tired of watching/reading about the topic while nothing helps it's so fucking frustrating

[sofias]

Thank you for creating these videos in a calm and compassionate way - it's immensely helpful ♥️

[theworldsdaddy]

Been feeling this way for 6 finally accepted alot of things that have happened to me in the past and present and the things ive felt but suppressed for years...Ive always been very sensitive so this has made me feel like a different person.

[isabelle]

"It's not about feeling good it's about how good we are at feeling"
❤

[mayfair]

Thank you. I’m so grateful to have found you here. Just started listening a couple days ago and already starting to sense very subtle, but profound shifts. 🙏

[blueskythinking]

OMG you absolutely hit the nail on it's head in so many ways for me. I wish I had your videos ten years ago when i was numbing out in front of the TV and couldnt break it off. I have sabotaged myself in so many ways. Thank you thank you thank you for your videos and your books

[Relifurious-prlg]

I hope everyone reading this will be okay, I hope I will be too, this is the best video about the subject

[AmineOuldKaci]

I'm always tense, I hold my stomach without even noticing. I have crossdressing and AGP tendencies and after a lot of work on myself, I found that i dissociated and still dissociate a lot. My teachers complained from it, my parents complained. Not knowing that they were the reason why. And maybe some biological predisposition to mental illness, my uncles are all fucked up mentally. Thank you for your videos, you're the only one who's actually giving a very logical and basic form of healing. I'm not afraid of pain, I just need this pressure on top of my shoulder to lessen and let me express my emotions.

[jodiejackson]

“If you’re listening to Scandinavian death metal” …. How did you know that Doc? 🤣❤️