Imaginary friends and real-world consequences: parasocial relationships | Jennifer Barnes | TEDxOU

Dr. Barnes creates characters as a YA author and studies people as a psychologist, leading her to ask: what are the consequences of the emotions we feel about people who aren’t real?

Dr. Jennifer Barnes lives a double life: by day, she’s a professor of psychology, and by night she’s a YA novelist. These passions have lead her to study the intersection of fiction and cognition.

[Orikron]

This speaker looks like that kind of person who's always adorably excited about something and just spreads the good mood around to everyone else. Great speaker.

[Creamaccno]

IRL, I have no friends and is forgotten.
In my world, I am the most popular and important person in the universe.

[mollymacaroni]

THIS is the woman who wrote the naturals, the lovely and the lost, and the inheritance games!!

[andielangemeyer]

YES! My favourite kind of Academic: doesn't lead with her credentials, but leads with her passion. You know she's a great teacher when she speaks in a way that captures AND holds peoples attention, using accessible language, breaking down concepts in a way people can relate too instead of being too stuck in the theory. Thank you Jen!

[TamTam-bdqw]

I have an imaginary friend and he've always been with me, he's my favorite thing in this world and the only real thing in my life . I love him the most .

[Wanderingsoul]

Kpop stan twitter is filled with people who believe that their idols are their friends/boyfriends. It is not entirely bad especially if they are helping you to feel good about you and give you strength however it can turn into a nightmare if you go in too deep. I have seen girls believing that the idol they stan love them back however they forget that they love the fandom as a whole their love is out of gratitude they feel towards their fans and the 'love' 'love'. With social media the lines have blurred even more fans think they own the idol and think they have some kind of right over their lives. I wish people start watching these kinds of videos and learn to draw a line. This was very informative and well explained.

[haneul]

When reality is painful you turn to fiction. When you're busy living your life and being happy you could care less about celebs and fictional characters

[rosesfeel]

Jennifer Lynn Barnes is one of my favorite authors, it’s amazing seeing her in other fields. She’s passionate about what she talks about, and that translates into her novels

[ThePaperFlowers]

Those results might have something to do with how we think about other people. We understand fictional characters because writers go to great lengths to help us understand them. But we struggle to understand other people, because other people are not easy to understand--they lie, they understate their feelings, they withhold information. 
This is why it's so important to provide young people with stories about underrepresented communities. People frequently transfer their understanding of fictional characters to their understanding of real people in those communities. When only 1 book in a library of 100 features a character of color, or a character with a disability, or a character with an abnormal sexuality, that means readers only have that single reference to navigating real life relationships and understandings of other people. When only one reference is available, people start to stereotype and assume that a certain trait or personality is the "norm" for a certain community, and that stereotyping reduces empathy.

[_Chessa_]

I want more studies on this. As someone that’s committed to a fictional relationship. I’d love more deep dives studies and any analytics pertaining to fictional relationships, imaginary relationships and parasocial relationships. I’m 9 years late to this party, but I’ve been in a committed two decades long fictional relationship with my lover. ❤

[hannahmiller]

Everyone is a mythical character to each other. We can never truly know another person, no matter how much information you have, you can never "pin down" a person, you can't even 100% pin down your own self. because we are constantly changing, learning new things, and adapting to our environments. The best we can do is to structure our relationships in a way that allows for growth and change, and a relating style that evolves with the individuals. just try not to think too much about philosophical things because the answer is there are no absolute answers, there are people's opinions + the power they use to enforce their opinions. And the power to enforce your own answers comes from relationships with real world people who support you through all your changes and evolutions, because they want that support also, and you both know that nobody can be totally known because people change after responding to events that have already transpired

[hopoutside]

goes to show that people live in their story more than reality. I've always thought this has something to do with survival instincts for humans, primarily to avoid pain. We see it now more than ever. People reject reality all the time, and frequently engage in fictional narratives to cope, or better yet avoid, reality. I do not believe this is a race thing; it's more cultural from my perspective. Living in story, whether close or far from actual reality, is simply easier for folks. When people get hit with reality, it often doesn't go so well and a change in personal life philosophy is often required. This is not fun! Great talk, thanks.

[LTProductionsInc]

I think I have more parasocial relationships than real ones but I think that comes from being sensitive and a writer. The funny thing is that most of my favorite fictional characters wind up dying anyway. But I think that all people are equally complex as my favorite fictional characters and that's a beautiful thing.

[TheLukeMonster]

My only disappointment with this talk is that she doesn't address if there are any statistics on how normal people with parasocial relationships with real celebrities they've never met or contacted in person are positively or negatively affected if and when they actually do meet said celebrities in person.

[snowqueen]

If you have an imaginary friend, wife, girlfriend, husband, or boyfriend, your cognitive development rearranges and it helps you become more social in the real world. Just don't disrespect your imaginary companion.

[vaal]

I think every weebs and stan exist in the world need to watch this to answer the question why they're so invested on their waifus/husbando or idols eventhough they know that those ppl they love is not even exist or so far reached.

Don't get me wrong. i'm both of the world and find this video answering the question i don't even aware of. thank you so much Dr. Barnes!

[brennascavo]

the line between influencers and audience parasocial relationships gets VERY blurry. stay safe yall

[Anna-yhfb]

Okay so now I saw this video I got to confess something I never dared before : I am not a very surrounded person, I don't have my "group of friends" and I know a got to more socializing with real people, and I used to be ashamed of having parasocial relationship. But I think I live in peace with that now. And let me tell you something : my imaginary best friend is called Cécile, she is redhead, has a fire temperament, and she is great. She is all I never dare to be in society. You would love her, everybody would. Road Kamelot, character from the manga D. Gray-man (my favorite, great manga go read it) is my favorite character and Lavi Bookman Jr., another character from this same manga is the love of my life !

[Thorum]

What an interesting talk. Dr. Barnes is such an excellent speaker!

[hannahdunn]

Wow. I have an imaginary friend. She's my best friend in the world.