The H.A.G. / Apollo Kepler

“Nalin, Calla, Zahir, Hana / No matter the shape / I’ll find a way to break the frame.”

After years of studying the theory of rebirth, the researcher was finally able to identify and examine his previous incarnations. His work showcased two key findings. One: He was always predestined to die at the age of twenty-four as punishment for a past incarnation attempting to achieve immortality. Two: In each life, his lover tirelessly attempts to revive him and is destined to never succeed. Desperate to break the cycle, the researcher converted his soul into a digital format with the H.A.G., stripping himself of his humanity. He Intended to do the same to his lover regardless of whether or not he was willing. Terrified of who the researcher had become, the lover chose death, escaping into the next life without the researcher.

[H.A.G. / HUMAN ASCENSION GAMBIT]
[L.O.R.D. / LOG of ORIGIN and REPEATED DEATH]
[RESEARCHER / PREVIOUS INCARNATION: HANA]
[LOVER / PREVIOUS INCARNATION: CASSANDRA]

The true ending to the “Dream Granter" & "Caffè Latte" saga.
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I’m so excited to finally have this project done after three years!! It’s gone through so many different phases so it feels unreal that it has reached completion. I want to thank Apollo, Sleppu, Jamie, and Toon for all helping me make this finale song possible. It was really fun to reinterpret the ending of one of my first (and scuffed lol) narratives. I hope 2020 vane fans are getting psychic damage from this centering Hana’s reincarnation LOL. This song also doubles as a bit of a send off for Apollo as he has entered a streaming hiatus! I really wanna take a moment to shine a light on how much Apollo has been a fantastic collaborator and friend. It’s always an honor to work alongside him. Love you my dearest chum 👼👼. also theres a few typos in the mv so please check below for correct lyrics ! -vane

“minerva bot, hug my son” -apollo
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Music: @vanelily
Vocals/Video: @apollokepler
Mixing/Mastering: @JamiePaigeIRL
Vocal Timing: @toon2n
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Ascension, suspension, redemption
A gambit’s lesson in desperate obsession
Reflection, confession, regression
A foolish message to question progression

Darling, hold my hand tight
Beneath the fading moonlight
Don’t fear, for when you wake
I’ll be there waiting, dear
So, darling, hold my hand tight

It’s sick how sympathetic values
Stain on the skin
(Timelines demystify systematic suicide)

Yet your win is martyred as a
Poor man’s attempt at sin
(Timelines demystify systematic suicide)
I’ll rewrite my plight tonight

We seem to meet on those snowy, winter days
As the summer slumbers in a solar-still malaise
Reside in twilight, I know our souls are tied
I’ll blight the night

And as the vagaries of life
Pass through our transitory eyes
I see you there and eulogize

If our fates are bound by my past mistakes
I’ll forsake every memory
And damn us to never wake
Betray the angel’s frame

Redemption, obsession, regression, progression
Through cycles and trials, could I still atone?
Come say you hate me, berate me
That you’re not worth saving
But what of the blood gently staining the snow?

Just tell me
Tell me why you have to go
How could you know?
How could you ever know?
(How would you even know?)

Stay with me
Sinking into the unknown
How could you know?
Just tell me how you know

May the L.O.R.D. be my light
May he guide this spineless spite
As the flow of fate refrains
I’ll embrace your cold remains

Human ascension is a belligerent game
(And on that day we split that latte)
The tides of time are set to restless shame
(We saw our fate)
Oh, Nalin, Calla, Zahir, Hana
(In refrain, wilting away)
No matter the shape
I’ll find a way to break the frame

That frame of us remains in my head
A collage of all the ways you’ve seen me dead
I lay awake in phantom embrace
As these memories caress my frigid face

And the song that you wrote
As the snow graced the oak
Left an old haggard crow
On an endless plateau

I’ll lament my descent
But I’ll never repent
Watch this heartache transcend

Begging,
“Don’t you wilt away!”
The H.A.G. cries out in vain
As forty-two cicadas laugh in his face

“The past can’t be negotiated,”
Father Time declared
But I’m stuck here still, my daffodil
Tell me why you’ve lost your will

The gods are ever cruel
For even in this life I am but a fool
My tears create a burning shame
To bring this world to flames

Oh, your feeble face is
Rotting upon the rust
The charred remains of this place
Will be nothing but scattered dust

Dios, te odio
Ay, te odio
Gasté siglos buscando absolución
Hace años que me abandonaste
Tres milenios de pura aversión

[silverapplestar]

The third key finding is that toxic yxxi is a constant regardless of what incarnation.

[fanatic_anon]

Only vocaloid producers could drive me to tears with a single fucking line

[starryvidz]

in case anyone was wondering, this is what the spanish at the end roughly translates to:
"god i hate you
oh, i hate you
i spent centuries seeking absolution
you abandoned me years ago
three millennia of pure aversion"
i am NOT spanish speaking, and i translated this with google, so take it with a grain of salt!!! however, i think that adds an extra depth to the narrative, , will edit this comment with more findings!

edit one: cicadas symbolize resurrection and immortality, and 42 is the number we as humans associate with the universe. i just think thats neat :)
edit two: im back with more quick symbolism; daffodils symbolise rebirth & new beginnings. daffodils are also narcissus' flower, symbolizing vanity & unrequited love. this is Also an interesting thing to note!!!

[jadziajan]

Oh Vane I can interpret this in shapes that suit my beloved OC in ways you cannot imagine

[ArcosOfFireheart]

I didn't even process at first that the researcher was Hana's reincarnation. I thought it was Cassandra's. Imagine the double take i had when re-reading the description.

I can't escape the doomed yxxi.

[ruthieweber]

Came here from Flavor Foley and this is SO GOOD!! Especially with the researcher being punished for pursuing immortality in a past life, but later becoming an inhuman, effectively immortal program to try and break the cycle, only to lose the love who made his life meaningful in the first place?? Like that’s so good??? I love it!!!???

[tictocnicnoc]

Gosh this is so good!!!! Irony is not lost on me, that the latest incarnation of Hana, who told Cassandra to let go and move on without them, couldn't accept their fate himself...

[ChaoticallyCrimson]

YESSSS I CANT WAITTT
“Break dances”
“puts music by vane lily on blast”

[ROTFORCLOUT]

The second year of an Apollo Kepler/Vane collaboration on the fourth of August..we are lucky…

[EepyBatteries]

The use of he/him in the description makes me wonder if this will be a different character or if it’s Casandra after he transitioned

[BonkaPonkaIsNoSuchThing]

Found out this was actually the end to the dream granter saga and now I'm repeatedly speedrunning the five stages of grief that completely exceeds how I felt with Romeo and Juliet

but either way song is an absolute masterpiece and I will be looping this for the next week no matter how much pain this unhappily ever after will cause me 😍

[snowiblaze]

OMG THE WAY MY JAW DROPPED AT THE MENTION OF A LATTE--
Caffe Latte has always been my favorite Vane song and I'm so happy we got more of the story

[namega]

THE NOTORIOUS H.A.G. 🔥🔥🔥 no but seriously the emotions this song invokes in me are INSANE it's like a perfect x3 combo with the instrumental, vocals and desperation, the researcher watching the lover die in frantic horror as the room burns, trapped in their own digital prison as the only person who stayed by their side time and time again finally me man Vane never misses

[starchords]

WHAT?! This is not a development I ever expected for Hana and Cassandra's story.

[akuma]

i had no idea this was part of another series, was completely unaware of the story, and this song still managed to almost make me cry. now that's a feat

[CoffeeBrownie]

"Sinking into the unknown" reminds me of how I was listening to this song when I lost my stylis. It too sank into the unknown... underneath my couch.

[ribbnzz]

i listened to this before knowing anything about the prior two songs and i went and listened to those songs and now im back here and what if i EXPLODED AND DIED. WHAT IF I DID i love tragic toxic yxxi!!

also im so normal about this art its so gorgeous and i didnt know what was going on until i got the context from the previous songs

[Plant-cp]

Never in a million years would I have imagined that the Dream Granter saga would end with hyper-advanced soul tech.
Killer song, btw ❤

[signoffintrusion]

wanted to write up a theory on a couple parts of this one...

"The H.A.G cries out in vain, as 42 cicadas laugh in his face..."

-_The cicada is an animal replete with symbolism: recurring themes are resurrection, immortality, spiritual realization and spiritual ecstasy._

-_In Douglas Adams' The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, 42 is the number from which all meaning ("the meaning of life, the universe, and everything") can be derived._

we know the lover and the researcher are reincarnations of cassandra and hana respectively. with the researcher---or hana, rather---rejecting their humanity to break the cycle of repeated death and lamentation and intending to force the lover into the same, they're turning away the idea of life and death, which makes us human. the laughing cicadas are the concept of existence, which multiplies to encompass the whole universe. it's not just humans that live and fade away, but _everything._

the concept of humanity and existence is leering at the researcher, rejecting all that makes them a living being just to live forever with the love of their life. their intentions are good, but they're defying natural code. they know this, too. they know what they're doing is against all of nature, but it's what they want. even so, it's something they can't access without a price---the price being the lover, escaping into the next life alone.



a rough translation of the spanish near the end means "god, i hate you / oh, i hate you / spending centuries seeking absolution / you abandoned me years ago / three millenia of pure aversion"... keep in mind, this was done with a translator, so chances are my translation is highly inaccurate.

this can be viewed from either the researcher or the lover's perspective. to the researcher, it's a hatred for life and death and time and what lies beyond, feeling abandoned by a higher power and left to die time after time and spending all their life staying away from it trying to outrun it. to the lover, it's a kindling hatred for the researcher, feeling abandoned by their love over and over as the researcher stays away from them to dedicate their life to finding a way to cheat death once and for all.



so this was a long one and yet an irresistable one to look into. also tell apollo i wanna know how he feels now that he's out of the music basement again this year

[amateurland]

The fact that this is literally connected to songs made 4 YEARS AGO! I literally freaked out in a good way because I love those songs! Great job, Vane!