Performance & Stability Anti patterns - Alex Mackey

Do you want to design and develop systems that fall over at the merest hint of usage?

Or maybe you want to create a system that can cope with as many as.. 5 users?

Well this is the session for you!
In this session we will explore the technical and design decisions (and alternatives) that can lead to your applications being more fragile than Kanye West’s slim grip on reality!

We'll look into how to create random hard to replicate system crashing issues, discuss how you can ensure your system will slowly grind to a halt over time & finally wrap up with a bullet proof way to ensure you have job security for the next 10 years - as long as you like constantly patching issues and thrive on running from user lynch mobs!

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