Story Setting

[02:42] Describing the setting before starting the action:
[03:20] Describing the setting by layering it into the story:
[04:42] Showing, Rather than Telling
[05:25] Immediately Applying This Description Technique

Jerry Jenkins discusses the challenge of starting a novel with setting descriptions. He advises against beginning with separate setting descriptions, advocating for integrating setting details into the narrative. Jenkins provides examples and emphasizes the importance of showing rather than telling, ultimately aiming to engage modern readers effectively.

[vinodhuria]

How to dramatically begin a story has been beautifully illustrated. A master storyteller himself, Jerry transforms in time to reveal how stories were narrated when people had the time and patience to read details, and now when the audience does not need the details but wants to jump to see the action, as accustomed to by the latest format of short videos, crisp stories and fast clips.

[TheOppositeIsTrueBook]

These principles never get old. They keep us at our best! Thank you!

[rofernk]

Jerry have shaped my writing in so many ways. I used to be a member of his online coach classes, and it is amazing. I super commend it. He is a pro and believe me, 99.9% of what he says will work for you.

[AnisDomini]

I’ve almost finished my first ever second draft, and just wanna say thank you for all the advice and motivation

[rotimioladejo]

"Show rather than tell" Thank you Jerry

[hansbengtsson]

Jerry Jenkins - the best writing coach out there! Thanks for your generous effort for us beginners!

[RickRascati]

Hi, Jerry. Working on my first novel and have found your videos a fountain of knowledge. Being visually impaired, it is very helpful to have someone clearly articulate their information succinctly. Thanks!

[bobr]

Harry Chapin used to write songs that were like stories and he was, in my humble opinion, masterful at condensing a great deal of information smoothly and eloquently. In his song “Taxi“, the first four lines tell us the weather, the city he’s in and he’s driving a taxi, and it’s nighttime and he seems to want to go home. The woman gets in, is soaked from the rain, and barely acknowledges him as she reveals she’s going to a part of town that’s above his pay grade. That is a great deal of information to get into the first verse and a half of a song and make flow perfectly. Frankly, how could you not want to know more? I wonder if Harry ever wrote any stories that weren’t songs. I think “Taxi” is an example of absolute genius.

[Hazzacheets]

I love your videos, they’re extremely helpful! Thank you so much!

[boydcraven]

Great example. Thank you! I like your style of coaching.

[taleaina]

Thank you Jerry, your tips are always helpful

[abil]

Thank you so much for all your writing advice and guidance, Mr Jenkins! You are my first mentor in the world of writing. 😊

[ChristophelusPulps]

I might be the weird one, but I like a good, brief setting description to start a novel, especially if it effectively sets the correct tone.

[Catratio]

I love your videos, Jerry. Great examples this time too. I always have to remind myself to follow this advice, but at the same time not make adding information bits too brief. It's a delicate balance.

[AnthonyMiyazaki]

Another great lesson. Thank you Jerry!

[ernestkyere]

Thank you Jerry. I tried to rewrite an opening of one of my chapters based on your advice of layering out the setting along action by my characters and this is what I have . I don’t know if I got it right though. Any feedback guys?

Original

The road snaked ahead, winding through the dense forest stretching endlessly before them. From the passenger seat, all Malik could see were the passing trees on either side of the narrow ribbon of asphalt. His gaze flitted nervously between the looming trunks and the mysterious mark on the driver’s clenched hand.
An uneasy silence hung in the close air of the car, amplified by the steady hum of the engine. Malik studied the scorpion tattoo anxiously and curiously. It was one he had seen before, and which in hope of gaining answers to, led him to ignore the warning all children are given: never follow strangers. But he was no longer a child, though in some ways he had never been a normal boy. The darkness children ran from, he embraces. Malik had to break the silence and free himself from the unsettling questions. “The scorpion on your hand… where did you get it?
At first, no response came, his eyes fixed dead ahead on the winding road. Malik watched his stony profile, wondering if he would deign to answer at all. The forest pressed in as afternoon light filtered through, as impenetrable as the man’s silence. Only the twisting road offered any clue as to what lay ahead in the thick gloom beneath the towering sentinels of trees.
Malik stared as the driver finally spoke, his voice breaking the long silence. “It’s from a long time ago. Why do you ask? Have you seen it before?” Turning to him with a subtle smirk



Rewrite

Malik's head rested on the doorframe of the truck, his eyes fluttering to the arrowed sun rays that gleamed into the car from the windscreen. The road snaked ahead, winding through the dense forest stretching endlessly before them. From the passenger seat, all he saw were the passing trees on either side of the narrow ribbon of asphalt.

His gaze flitted nervously between the looming trunks and the mysterious mark on the driver's clenched hand.

The hum of the engine underneath amplified, as noisy as the uneasy silence that loomed in the car. Malik studied the scorpion tattoo anxiously and curiously. He had seen it before. And in the hope of gaining answers to its meaning, he ignored all the warnings children are given: never follow strangers.

But he was no longer a child, though in some ways he had never been a normal boy. The darkness children ran from, he embraced. His hand gripped tightly the leathered seat he sat on, and for a few moments, he parted his lips without saying a word, until he piped up, his voice faltering, "The scorpion on your hand... where did you get it?"

No response came. The driver's eyes remained fixed dead ahead on the winding road.

Malik watched his stony profile, unyielding and unreactive; he wondered if he would deign to answer at all. The forest pressed in as the afternoon light filtered through, much brighter, as impenetrable as the man's silence. Only the twisting road offered any clue as to what lay ahead in the thick gloom beneath the towering sentinels of trees.

Malik stared as the man finally spoke, his voice breaking the long silence. “It’s from a long time ago. Why do you ask?” He said, turning to Malik, “Have you seen it before?” He gave him a subtle smirk.

[neofulcrum]

Dan Abenett does a great job at doing this with his gaunt’s ghosts series.

[PiatekMichal]

Great advice, as always. Thank you Mr Jenkins.

[pixel]

Thanks for sharing these free and wonderful nuggets of information.

[ucheeh]

I love your videos so much
Thank you😊