Driving while autistic: my experience

Driving while autistic (or learning to drive) can be filled with struggles for many people.

In this video I talk about
- My own experience learning to drive as an undiagnosed autistic adult (and eventually passing my test)
- The various skills needed to drive which might get overlooked as particular struggles for autistic people: motor skills, visuospatial differences, attention to detail (and why that might be a hindrance) and navigational skills.
- A few tips that might help

(☕If you like my content and just want to “tip” me, you can buy me a single Ko-Fi ☕)

[katielynneyoung]

I can either focus on operating the car, the rules of the road or all of the extraneous sensory input, but not all of those at the same time🙃 I also completely lose my sense of direction when I'm in an enclosed space, as the driver or passenger. I don't have that issue when walking or biking. I have a license but have chosen not to drive. I've adapted by walking if I'm going 10 miles or less round trip, riding my bike for longer trips.Also, Uber is also my best friend. I'm with you on public transport. It's very overwhelming!!!

[HistoryNerd]

I'm only 24 but as someone who's still working on getting my license, it's good to know I'm not the only one who takes a while to get it. I think anxiety is probably the toughest thing for me behind the wheel. 😁

[babblgamgummi]

I passed my test on the fourth try. That last time, I had the most compassionate examiner. He asked me what would help calm me down, and then let me sing during the test. He tested my parking in the middle of the test, so I could have a little break to calm down. Honestly, I don't think I would have ever gotten my license without him

[Pyromaniac]

I'm also surprised you didn't mention the panic of "OH MY GOD THIS OTHER CAR JUST FLASHED THIER LIGHTS AT ME WHAT DO THEY WANT FROM ME!?!?". I've never been able to figure out how most people seem to have this intuitive contextual understanding of what flashing means in every situation. Is my car damaged? Do I have a light out? Is there a police car around the corner? Do they want me to pull out? Are they thanking me? Do they recognise me? I'm slowly starting to get the hang of it but 3 years into driving I still panic a little bit about 50% of the time :D

[xoxoLeony]

Oh Sam, this was so validating for me. I had the hardest time getting comfortable driving a car. I failed my driving test once (had a total mind blank anxiety situation after failing one of the maneuvers I was supposed to do) and after getting my license on the second try I basically didn’t drive at all for two years because I was so scared to. I too did really well with the “technical” aspects but it was just TOO MUCH to focus on at once. Things got better when I switched from manual to an automatic car and there was one less thing to stay on top of. I also had an eye surgery for strabismus and felt more confident driving after that.
Every video you make I feel like I am absolutely sure that I am autistic. I really need to try my best to get an official diagnosis because I know that otherwise (and maybe even with one) people in my life would never ever believe me.

[aether]

I find driving cars way too overwhelming, there's too much to focus on, but weirdly, I picked up riding a motorbike right away, that felt natural to me, I'm still working on being comfortable with a car so for now my bike is a pretty good alternative

[lisawanderess]

I didn’t get my licence until I was 26. I can’t count how many times people have said they saw me driving and waved or tooted their horns but that I didn’t notice them! Now it all makes sense! 😂

[iam]

I love driving, it’s like a stim as the movement and ever changing view stimulates me, I can also hold a conversation whilst driving as my focus is on the environment outside. Love these vids 👍

[Mrs.Silversmith]

I didn't know I was autistic when I learned to drive.  The thing that helped me was that my driving instructor noticed how incredibly nervous I was on the first day.  When they were assigning students to the various instructors, he decided to make sure I was one of his students because he was good with nervous drivers.  Having a calm, supportive instructor made a big difference for me.  I can empathize with having sensory overload when driving,  it tends to happen when I am going somewhere new and I don't really have any mental filter built up for what I need to pay attention to.  I have to be very alert when I am going somewhere new.

[glitter_rose]

My entire life, I’ve always dreaded turning 16 and having to start driving, like there’s just soooo much you have to pay attention to and look out for and there’s so much multitasking involved. I’m 22 now, haven’t been officially diagnosed yet, but I’m 100% sure I’m autistic. Even though I did get my license and eventually my own car, I still avoid driving if and when I can help it.

My main struggles are:

1-Multitasking. I cannot for the LIFE of me pay attention to driving my car, reading road signs, watching the road, checking my mirrors, etc all at once—I can only focus on one at a time, which obviously isn’t good and could potentially be dangerous.

2-Spatial awareness. Parking, switching lanes on a busy highway, or any driving situation where I have to be able to make enough space between myself and other cars is EXTREMELY difficult—even when using my mirrors or checking my blind spots—it just feels impossible to know how much room I have and I’m always scared I’m going to accidentally hit someone else and cause a crash—which thankfully hasn’t happened yet but that leads me to my next big struggle:

3-Severe PTSD from a car crash. Ironically, when I was 16 (but before I even got my learner’s permit, my older brother was driving at the time) me and my family were hit a by drunk driver and it was a NASTY crash, I mean had we not been wearing our seatbelts and had it not been for a list of other VERY LUCKY circumstances, we wouldn’t even be alive. I still have bad flashbacks DAILY and sometimes I still get nightmares. Being in a car, whether or not I’m driving, is so incredibly anxiety inducing and still causes me huge panic attacks.

4-Whenever I’m in the passenger seat watching the driver, it’s as if I know when/where to turn at intersections yet the SECOND I get in the drivers seat and drive through those SAME intersections, it’s like I forget everything and I just panic and my mind goes completely blank.

5. I am incredibly directionally challenged, like even using google maps is too complex for me and I get lost so easily—even in places I’ve been to/driven through multiple times.

Sorry this was so long, but driving is one of my BIGGEST struggles in life and I rarely even leave the house anymore because of it. But to anyone who took the time to read my long-ass comment, you deserve a cookie 🍪 and thank you! 🙏🏻💙

[karensparkes]

I failed my driving test twice, not because I couldn't drive but because I couldn't handle the test. I then had to surrender my licence because of physical medical issues. 11 years later I was cleared to drive again, but only an automatic. My original instructor was good but I didn't go back to her because she didn't teach automatic, only manual.

I really lucked out because the only automatic instructor I could get hold of in my area was experienced with disabled drivers, both physical and neurological. He didn't know I was autistic to start off with. About 8 lessons in, as I really already knew how to drive from my previous learning, he gave me a mock test. About 10 minutes into it, I almost had a panic attack. He talked me safely to a parked position and talked through with me what the issue was.


The next three months were focused, not on teaching me to drive, but on preparing me for the test. He didn't mention the 't-word' again until he knew I was mentally ready for it. He worked out that I was quite chatty in normal lessons but silent during that awful mock test. That was because I was overthinking everything. He correctly pegged that and made me study the news in the run-up to my test so that I had something to talk to the examiner about. It definitely helped me to pass.

One of the major problems I have is with reversing. No matter how much the sensible side of my brain tells the squirrelly side that putting the car in reverse makes the car 'see' the back of the car as the front, I still want to steer the way that I want the front of the car to go, not the back. Every time I reverse, there's a battle between my conscious and subconscious as to which way I turn the wheel. My conscious wins every time but the struggle is exhausting.

One of the manoeuvres on the British Test now is 'pull up on the wrong side of the road (the right side, which is a little confusing), reverse two car lengths and then pull back into traffic'. It is actually illegal to pull up on the wrong side of the road but everyone does it so they want you to be able to do it safely. I am a finicky rule-follower so this one was a double whammy for me. I have to do something illegal, then do something unnatural, followed by something stupid. Guess which manoeuvre I got on my test? I think the examiner thought I was a little loopy as I literally had to talk myself into doing it!

[UmbraKrameri]

(To my knowledge) I'm not autistic, but I have some coordination issues that make me learn new types of movement challenging. So I was very nervous about learning to drive. In my country, the system is about as accomodating as in the UK, but fortunately I've found an instruktor who had experience with anxious drivers and had courses for women who had their licence but was afraid to drive too. He was very patient and the perfect fit for me. And my parents were willing to finance almost 3 times more lessons than required by law.

[jennasink]

This was really validating! Nobody understood why I wasn’t very excited or motivated to learn how to drive, but it was just really scary and stressful and HARD. I passed my test at age 18, and I enjoy driving now (when I’m by myself anyway), but it was a difficult road to get there. I’m totally with you on the attention to detail not being a benefit when learning, even if it is afterward. Thanks for talking about this!!

[rebecca]

I cried during my driving test. I was so anxious about it but like you said, didn’t want people to drive me around all the time.

[thecubetas]

Now I understand why my mom ended up taking a driving test four times and never drove a car after she passed that test. I think my driving education experience was different because I started with a motorcycle license, where they teach you to look into the curve and you feel the movement with your whole body. Anxiety and an unfamiliar car led to failing my first car test, then a hiatus after finally passing. But I got comfortable with the roads on the motorcycle and comfortable with driving a car with my spouse. Thank you very much for making these videos. (34, female, and waiting for a diagnosis)

[martaluterek]

Okay so I've not actually been diagnosed autistic so my contribution to this discussion may not be as relevant, but for a while I have been debating whether I might be on the spectrum and I really relate to a lot of what you said in this video.
I actually passed my exam on first try, but I honestly think it was due to how desperate I was to get my license and be able to drive myself to school so I just extremely focused and got it done. Only afterwards did I realize I was actually terrified of driving by myself and it took driving the way to my school with my dad many times for me to do it. It also took my dad being the calmest person on the planet which was a relief after my instructor was the worst and kept shouting at me and offending me personally when I did something wrong. I'm still very anxious when I have to drive a way that I haven't driven before, especially since my spacial orientation is literally the worst, I can't even properly navigate my small city. I also sometimes tend to get really weird, intrusive thoughts while driving, aka I'll just be calmly making my way through the city and suddenly I think of how a child could run into the road and I would kill them, which doesn't help either.
Anyway, thanks for this video. Also it has literally never occurred to me that you should make eye contact with other drivers? No thank you though, I'd rather look at the dogs.

[Aiken]

I’m a particularly good driver, I have high situational and spatial awareness it is one of my special abilities. I ride a motorcycle 1300cc.
My ability is to read with good success what is happening in traffic as far as my eye can see. To the point I have an intuition for when people aren’t going to obey the rules, I can move lanes etc before that person even uses the indicator.
I particularly enjoy riding scooters in Bali Indonesia. I do check my head space before I ride my motorcycle making sure I can concentrate. I was also a scuba dive master. I’m physically coordinated.
I do get upset when people break the rules all the time especially those times that cause an increased risk for other road users.

[lenelydiapetersen]

Hi Yo Samdy Sam

Great video!
I was just recently diagnosed with autism as an adult, and everything makes much more sense now.
I really enjoy your videos, I think we have a lot of the same issues more or less.

About this video, I always wondered why it was so hard for me, to get my drivers licence.
I obviously never figured it had something to do with autism, when I wasn't diagnosed, but it is nice to know that others have struggled with that too.
It took me about one year to get my drivers licence, and I would have given up, if my mom haven't forced me to get it. I rarely use it, and it was really provoking my anxiety, still does.

But now i have a sense of belonging somewhere, though my mother and her family are not supportive of my diagnosis, and thinks that it is an "excuse" to act immature and "weird"..

[Lttlefot]

Thanks for this video, I’m 22 years old and I have been avoiding learning to drive because I have been afraid of not being able to pay proper attention. I thought about learning when I was 18, but I decided against it. I wanted to save money and not have a reason to pay for gas/insurance/maintenance when I’ve made it this far in life without driving myself.
But also I don’t have a need to drive regardless, at least where I live now. I live with my boyfriend who can drive and we usually go places together anyway. Most of the time I walk where I need to go, but if COVID was not happening I would take public transit more (always with headphones in). If I don’t have headphones it’s a little overwhelming but much less so than the responsibility of driving would be to me. If I can’t get a ride from a loved one or friend, and I’m going a farther distance, I’ll just go on a shuttle service or something similar

[Stormbrise]

I’m glad you did get your license. My dad was very much into driving, taxi driver, old cars, etc. he had me on his lap at 3 years of age steering the wheel. I’m a lot older than you, this is way before seatbelt laws.

So I’ve been in love with driving as a kid, but I didn’t get my license until 25 years of age. I hyperfocus in the road in front of me. I don’t like automatic cars really, I love the control of a manual.