What working with psychopaths taught me about leadership | Nashater Deu Solheim | TEDxStavanger

[Shari]

Honesty without kindness is brutal.
Kindness without honesty is manipulation.

[CKs]

The most amusing thing about people who pride themselves on being frank is that they can never take it when you return the favour.

[dapsolita]

If being an authentic "leader" means you are constantly negative and critical of your team, there is an issue with you, not them.

[CherriesJubilee]

Empathy is not agreement. It is about understanding.

[paxwallacejazz]

Authenticity is true power. Being authentic isn't divulging every thought you have.

[Jeskrist]

Im about to leave my current position because of the brutal treatment. Mind you, I'm a quiet type who doesn't like confrontation, but I tend to speak up when I feel like I'm getting the short end of the stick. I realized my company does not value me or my work, it was time to go.

[VidralliaArchives]

I have mad respect for people who make it their life's work to understand the human mind.

[omez]

This is wonderful advice. It's all about balancing empathy with honesty, otherwise the listener will simply tune you out.

[peterjohnston]

"Working with psychopaths, I learned to be authentic. What I learned working with psychopaths, also works really well with world leaders." Ummm, so it appears the world is led by psychopaths. Just confirms what I already know.

[marenjasinski]

Being authentic isn’t an excuse to be brutal or careless.

[akash]

After hearing your Authentic talk i became Authentic with Empathy rather than Brutally Authentic, Thank You very much for your Insight .

[gng]

What we need is compassionate leaders, leaders who truly understand other people, encourage others to succeed, provide moral leadership, and accept diversity as a strength not only in character but in ideas. Such teams are shown to thrive more than those leaders who aren't open to these ideas.

[lekwanduh]

Honesty without tact is cruelty. Just be kind.

[paulnewton]

This is a real validation that we have a lot of psychopaths as leaders. I have been noticing the pattern lately of people in a leadership role who arent empathic, they kill people's dreams, unmotivate their team as though they arent humans.

Anyone who treats people anyhow and claims to be authentic has a psychological problem or is suffering deep inside.

We can only give what we have...if you have love, happiness inside of you, you will give your team and those around you love and happiness.

You can't fake it cos your non-verbal cues are louder than the ocean.

[tanial]

Empathy is not agreement. It is about understanding 👏

[ingridlandberg]

I took away 3 useful tools from this talk although I'm retired, disabled, live in senior housing. I don't get along well here. 1st, I'll change my role. I need to be a well oiled cog in this machine or else I will be replaced i.e. homeless. 2nd, I will accept the reality that most of people here enjoy making others suffer or try to avoid becoming targets themselves.3rd, remain curious because these people are always devising new ways to cause suffering. I bought a body cam to deter abuse and danger. This is a desperate situation but your talk provides hope for a workable solution. Thanks 👍

p.s. My point is that I am the leader of my own life. In every circumstance, I will identify my role, know the others involved, and stay curious about the others esp how they and I are evolving.

[ethanpetrea]

people like to pretend we are not completely different from one another and usually cant handle 100% honesty because it shatters that illusion

[jf]

Brutal honesty (unpretentiously honest) is not equal to being brutal (extremely harsh/ criticizing at all times)

[BassmeantProductions]

Honesty without tact is cruelty. Be genuine.

[dasminndavis]

The team and I were just having a meeting about authenticity and I wondered why I didn't feel open enough to share. Thank you so Much for putting this into perspective for me. Moving forward I am going to create a space of physiological safety.
1. Know your role as a leader and create boundaries
2. Know your teammates motivations
3. Remain curious and lead with empathy.