“When I was poor and complained about inequality they said I was bitter; now that I'm rich and I complain about inequality they say I'm a hypocrite. I'm beginning to think they just don't want to talk about inequality.”
Alex-cwrz
But what if I don't like champagne? can I be a lager socialist?
garhull
Wonderful that I got an advert for Prosecco before this. For the poorer champagne socialists.
hmallett
Ridiculous, and simultaneously still makes more sense than any Tory statement.
kellypaws
So accurate. Sad but still funny when you lay bare the ridiculous hypocrisy.
danalaniz
39 seconds of genius. Thanks!! Comedy as social scalpel.
highdownmartin
*WHAT ABOUT ME* I grew up incredibly poor, became rich, and now I'm incredibly poor again - am I allowed an opinion...?
piccalillipit
I didn’t have those on list that the Tory MP’s/press have had a go at or blamed for our woes over the last 7 years. I’ll add them on now…
1. Labour
2. The EU
3. Migrants
4. Illegal immigrants
5. Refugees/Asylum seekers
6. Judges (enemies of the people)
7. Experts (people are sick of experts)
8. Gina Miller
9. Academics (because they’re Marxists)
10. NHS (for partying during lockdown)
11. Teachers and Nurses (same)
12. EU loving civil servants
13. WOKE civil servants
14. Lazy public sector workers
15. The radical left
16. The left-wing media
17. Remain voters
18. Alistair Campbell (to blame for trying to unseat the PM as he was then)
19. The Unemployed (for ruining Brexit)
20. The Poor (because they should exist on 30p meals)
21. The Young (they’re why there’s too many food banks)
22. People working from Home (they’ve caused inflation)
23. The Unions (for ruining Brexit)
24. Businessmen (for still trying to trade with the awful, awful EU)
25. Jeremy Corbyn
26. Premier League Footballers (for protesting racism)
27. The National Trust (for wanting to say which houses were built by slaves or its profits)
28. The RNLI (for not pushing boat people back to France and rescuing them instead)
29. The European Court of Human Rights
30. Lefty lawyers (it’s THEIR fault we can no longer have human rights)
31. The French (because …you know …Calais)
32. Sir Kier Starmer
33. Holidaymakers (for causing last summer’s airport chaos)
34. The Bank of England (for not putting up interest rates fast enough)
35. The Deep State (for trying to undo Brexit)
36. Gordon Brown (for funding public services)
37. Antisemitic civil servants
38. The Antisemitic EU (according to Brandon Lewis)
39. Pensioners (because the great retirement is causing worker shortages)
40. The workers (no graft)
41. The Scottish parliament
42. Wokeness (it destroyed unboxed, the festival of Britain that no-one knew about)
43. Covid
44. The war in Ukraine
45. Gary Lineker
46. The remainer mind virus
47. Bus drivers transporting asylum seekers (because there’s a shortage in Ashfield)
48. Twitter users (AKA The left-wing twitterati)
49. Ben and Jerry’s (yes the ice cream company for suggesting safe routes for asylum seekers was good and flights to Rwanda, bad)
50. City traders
51. The next Labour government
52. The metric system (we’ll show the world by bringing back imperial measurements)
53. The IMF (that’s the International Monetary Fund, not the impossible missions force).
54. The pressure of the Queen’s death (the Reason Kwasi’s budget was pants)
55. Vladimir Putin
56. It’s a global thing (look at Japan)
57. Lib Dem’s
58. The SNP
59. Vested interests
60. Talking heads
61. Brexit Deniers
62. Extinction rebellion
63. Greenpeace Protesters
64. The Met office
65. NHS Managers
66. The WOKE leftist UN
67. Cyclists
68. Tofu-eaters
69. Guardian readers
70. Wokerati (I’m assuming that means people Suella considers WOKE)
71. The left-wing economic establishment
72. Peter Mandelson (for chairing the meeting discussing the problems of Brexit)
73. Problem tenants (who should be forced to work in fields pulling up potatoes and living in tents…you know. Like a work camp)
74. The WOKE Church (for wanting God to be genderless
75. Theresa May (according to Frost Lord)
76. Sue Grey
77. Boris Johnson’s Advisors.
78. Junior Doctors for jeopardising patient safety
79. Mick Lynch for trying to bring down the government
80. Civil Service Unions, for standing against the government who are bullying in our best interests.
81. Anti-Monarchists (who should leave the U.K.)
82. ONE random medical student who dared to speak out.
83. Champagne socialists (according to Jonathan Gullis)
84. Cultural Marxism
85. And the hardest of Brexithead headbangers blame the Tories for not brexiting hard enough.
emilymcplugger
This is basic feudalism which has been the pillar of UK politics for centuries ... you should know the rules by now!
elloco
That's a nice display of the current Tory Schrödinger's Political view. Both fluid and hypercritical 👍👍
TheMixCurator
But remember, rules are for the plebs, not the Tories.
orraman
I started life Badly...never had a pot to piss in...Left home at 15..probably safe to say, I was a loser until 30. Is that anyone else's fault?..of course not. Merely a long growth period
googleisshittoss
Doff cap, tug forelock.. know your place. Welcome to Rules* UK 🇬🇧
just-in
I am a beer drinking red wine, since I am Portuguese and with French German ascendency. Come to think of it, I never did like champagne, does that make me a Socialist or something? I am so ethnically confused...
joaomarreiros
I'd like to hear Colin from Portsmouth's opinion on this subject.
geoffpoole
I guess I am a value brand orange squash socialist in the 2nd-cheapest supermarket that's a bit closer to me than the 1st-cheapest, but not on the sale rack. Is that how that works?
Torthrodhel
Love to the fsmily Champagne Socialists.
Alex-cwrz
I like this comedy. It really make my head explode. Hehehe...
sslaia
We grew up in a shoe box in the middle of the road..Monty Python..bollocks!
