Goblins with guns are incredibly dangerous, these wizards should learn to magically conjure bullet proof armors
Grainus
“You are a wizard, Harry.”
“So what does that mean?”
“It means you’re a pervert.”
apple
I love the concept of doing “relatable” rants about completely unrealistic things as if they’re everyday occurrences and pet peeves. We need more of this kind of rant video
Bruhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
the idea of a wizard looking into your future just to get petty revenge is amazing
adon
I can relate. I was eating at a restaurant and this wizard dude at my table just kept going on about his spells and when I asked him for a bit of quiet so I could eat in peace, he sent me to the 12th plane of chaos. Thankfully I had a warlock friend who's patron lived there who teleported me back to the normal world.
thepizzaman
"It's not the middle ages anymore, wizards!"
-A literal sword-wielding knight
dan
Not even mentioning that we had to get rid of paper money because of wizards who kept using prestidigitation to trick you into thinking that the piece of paper he gave you was actually a 20$ bill
MiotaLee
Video essays from alternate universes is a great idea and I support it
MatthewPherigo
This video feels like a very elaborate shitpost and a genius metaphor at the same time
Eliagiulio
I saw a wizard at a grocery store in Los Angeles yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet one in person but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.
He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?”
I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying.
The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.
When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence, ” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.
dontspeaktoelectrohead
Also the fact that every wizard has *zero* self control. When presented with the chance to cast a spell that can destroy the world with the small chance of granting them a longer beard *THEY WILL DO IT*
nickster
1:07 Actually have a funny story related to that.
Back in Grade 4 I knew this kid that claimed he knew how to do magic. He claimed to always get perfect test scores because he could use his all-seeing orb to find out what all the answers were and insisted on always being excused from dodgeball during P.E. because his magic was so powerful that a single hit from one would send the school into another dimension.
Of course no one really believed him at first, but one day he got mad at our English teacher Ms. Eleanor for grading his paper with a 0 and transformed her into a chicken (apparently using his orb to write an essay counted as plagiarising someone from the 7th Realm).
Obviously it was at that point that we realized he had been telling the truth the whole time, and we quickly realized he was actually a 155 year old wizard who had incorrectly brewed a youth potion that now caused him to have to relive childhood. A whole bunch of us started asking him to use his magic to make us cool things (I asked for a Dairy Queen gift card) and overall we had a lot of fun messing around with his magic that day.
Unfortunately during all of the commotion, all of us had failed to realize that the lunchlady had mistaken Ms. Eleanor as the meat to be used in the chicken sandwiches for lunch that day. I had the soup so I didn't get to try one, but one of my friends told me she tasted pretty good. The wizard got expelled the next day because I guess Ms. Eleanor's family got mad at him or something and complained. None of us ever saw him again after that, but I still think about that day from time to time whenever I eat at a Dairy Queen now.
AmbiguouslyAnonymous
My wizard dad used to come home drunk every night and turn me into a frog, and then I had to wait for an hour of him arguing with my mom in the kitchen until she finally managed to convince him to turn me back to normal. Eventually it got so bad my mom had to hide me around the house so he wouldn't find me and turn me into a frog again.
I will never forgive wizards for this.
Nobody-edbv
As a wizard myself, i am quite offended. I would never use invisibility to steal, only for sneaking up on people and putting a crossbow bolt in their head from point blank range. For stealing, shape shifting is a much better option as someone who noone knows takes the blame instead and there is no way to prove it was the wizard shape shifting. God I love this country
danielstatler
Wizards being real and just obnoxious whimsical weirdos who’s magic is just annoying is my favorite bit
poopa_stinka
I laughed so hard at the cat part that everyone in my office now knows I'm not actually doing my job
captainmeadows
You never see Wizards who’s in a relationship. You wonder, why?
It’s because they’re always pondering their damn orbs, that’s why.
Spoonsies_
I know a guy called the Iron Wizard. Hates the Fae, wears cold iron armor and throws salt everywhere.
Also he has alot of sharp things. i dont think they count as swords but he hunts any fae or fairy creature.
Apparently he was tricked as a kid and his parents were resurected as zombies.
dimensionalchaos
I love how all of your videos feel like a commentary on commentary itself
huhneat
This definitely was originally going to just be a "pondering orb" meme that ended up becoming an entire animated wizard themed mockulist.
