Understanding the Power of Your Words - Dave and Ashley Willis

Dave and Ashley Willis share hilarious stories to illustrate the need for open and direct communication in ALL of our relationships, especially marriage. You’ll learn how to be careful with your words, how to be a better listener, and how to be an encouragement to others.

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[chloeanddiego]

Awesome reminder about the power of our words! 🙌🏼 The story about the grocery clerk made me tear up. 🥹

[tammysmith]

That was great; they were so honest and relatable, and they had great advice about how to encourage others, instead of tearing them down.

[lisacadman]

LOVE these two! Such real stories and good takeaway points!

[neishasibley]

I love the story you shared about your son who you had to give your clothes. I think that was very selfless to do so. You guys are great parents. God bless you both❤

[rebeccatoboolul-hossen]

Thank you for this! I needed to hear this today as I just blew it with my children and my husband. Needed this reminder to ask for forgiveness and to commit to doing better next time.

[cammcknight]

Kudos, 3 years ago I restored my heart and was able to save my 18 yr marriage. However, I could never put my finger on what the foundation was. God first yes! It was this concept I discovered and implemented it. Started with this " don't ask me why I'm doing what I'm doing or saying, I know it will be different, jus be patient with me " and I started acting different. 🙏🙏🙏.
Thankyou Lord.

[annenair]

Awesome talk/sharing, thank you for this timely reminder.

[funstuff]

First, I want to sincerely apologize for the tone of my initial post. I realize now that the world we each experience is shaped by the environments we grow up in and the realities we face. As a Black man, my environment has often been abrasive and unforgiving—so much so that, where I come from, words are rarely given the weight they seem to carry in other contexts. Words, in my experience, are just ideas, suggestions, or concepts. Promises are often empty, and information can be misleading. What truly matters in my world are actions.

Over the years, I’ve observed that people often say one thing and do another, creating a disconnect that taught me to value deeds over dialogue. If I gave too much importance to words alone, my life would be a constant source of frustration and abrasion. I would lose my peace of mind.

This perspective has shaped a core principle for me: “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt or define me.” In my environment, I cannot afford to be fragile. If someone hates me, let them prove it through their actions. If I am not someone’s ally, let them show it. If they don’t want to work with me, let them choose not to. For me, words without action are meaningless, and most people, in my experience, speak more from reaction than from a place of truth or reality.

I also recognize that everyone has different levels of sensitivity. For me, hearing a word like the n-word doesn’t hold power over me, because I’ve conditioned myself to see it as another empty sound unless actions follow it. From this perspective, when I see others consumed by the weight of words, I struggle to empathize. It feels, at times, like crying over not having dessert while others are struggling to get a meal. It reminds me of the importance of perspective: to humble oneself and see the bigger picture.

Actions always speak louder than words. For example, my father couldn’t always sit at the table with us for every meal because he had to work long hours to provide for the family. His absence at the table wasn’t neglect—it was love in action. Similarly, a parent might disapprove of your choices or express harsh words but still show unwavering love through their support and sacrifices. That’s the lens through which I view the world: actions over words. I have customers who invalidate me solely on my appearance. But one I show value to them. I am now tolerable. That is my world.

At the end of the day, I’ve learned to invalidate harmful words directed at me. If I reacted to every insult or criticism, I would lose myself. So, I choose to stay grounded, to focus on what people do rather than what they say.

My advice to anyone who feels burdened by words is this: humble yourself. Understand that the world is vast, with challenges far greater than the sting of careless remarks. Let your actions define you and speak louder than any words ever could.

Don’t speak recklessly but know that sticks and stones will break your bones. But words are just that words not action.