I love spending time with people but I need space to decompress😭

[bethannsmith]

Me hiding in my room for two hours when my family comes over 😭

[_aconite_cj_]

Morgaan, ydk how comforting it is to hear this. Idk if I'm autistic or not but I agree and relate with so many of your points. This especially. I NEED to be left alone. I can't appreciate my homies enough but I NEED ALONE TIME.

Edit: since people will see this, please drink water cutie ily

[tailsimp]

I've tried to explain it before like needing sleep. You wouldn't get mad at me for choosing to sleep instead of hanging out with you because we need sleep- It's the same here!!! It's the fact that as soon as I woken up I like to hang out with you that should count here!

[todadilepengukingdom]

As an AuDHDer, this is probably why I'm having meltdowns, verbal shutdowns, and end up zoning out and fatigued. I'm forcing myself to spend time with others when I want to go home and be alone. Even hanging out with my 2 best friends and my mom, it can be hard, but they are great because they love alone time.

[amira_]

I feel like this is also an introvert thing. I do love my friends and family, and I love spending time with them, but eventually I just need to be alone so I can recharge my social battery.

[bidagh]

I Watch your videos to understand my unverbal autistic son 😢 so thank you so much ❤️

[raintalon]

Its like when an animal that can't expell heat through sweating, telling an animal that can.. 'i need to rest'. And the horse, for example, just saying 'i can rest while i walk, why can't you.' Not realizing the other can't sweat.

[CeruleanStar]

It's not that they don't understand, per se, although that's part of it. As an autistic person myself, I've realized that it makes them feel bad when they realize that the way they try to love us, by spending time with us, can sometimes hurt us. It's a very difficult thing to take in, since it can seem like we're blaming them, even when we're not, or it can make them feel guilty that their love isn't constructive to us in the moment.

Everyone wants to love and be loved. But sometimes lines get crossed between autistic and neurotypical people. It's no one's fault.

I think the most important part to explain when having this conversation is that there shouldn't be judgement on either side. We aren't faulting neurotypical people for wanting to spend time with us. But we also hope that they don't fault us for wanting to spend time alone sometimes. We love them too and like spending time with them, and our time needed alone doesn't change that.

As an AuDHD person, my mind is always taking in sensory information without a filter, and every social interaction needs to be processed manually. It's a lot. I simply need time alone in a controlled environment to give my brain a break. I'm not blaming anyone for communicating with me when it can be tiring. I love talking with people I love, and I love that they want to talk to me. But I do need breaks. That's not a reflection on how much I love or care for people. It's a reflection of how my brain works.

[edwardfish]

I’m autistic and an introvert, so I totally get this. The way that I explain it is that for me to truly recharge I need to be in a room that literally has no one else in it.

Most people I tell this to seem to get it. ❤

[RedRuneblade_Alt]

This is so painfully accurate. How you can explain something that someone else can't experience? 💔

[awil]

This is so true! After school I feel so stressed out from being around others and putting on a mask for hours. I've also been starting the day at 5 AM so it's really been putting a toll on me recently especially because I have insomnia. Right after school, all I want to do is just be alone and get some rest and quiet cause my ears always feel like they've been stressed out and ringing from how loud my school is; but I barely ever have that option. I share a room with my little brother and I don't have a safe space of my own, the closest that I get to that is the bathroom or the garage. And whenever I come home my brother is gaming on his PC in the room and is yelling at his friends almost all day till midnight and it's so hard to get rest! All I really want is to just be less anxious..

[celesteamberbagley]

I too need my alone time. I get too overwhelmed when ive got so many things going on. I just go and hibernate.

[catsareexcellent]

This is my experience too. I need time alone. When I was still in high school at my boarding school the school tried to make it mandatory to be downstairs until lights out. But I wanted to be in my room. Every day the dorm staff would come knocking and I would literally scream at the top of my lungs for them to F off because they always put me in fight or flight mode. I would have autistic meltdowns and they would be like oh you’re just being dramatic. Like no, if someone says leave them alone, leave them alone! Otherwise it’s harassment by definition. The audacity of some people is insane!

[King_of_Red_Lions]

I feel this so deeply... I grew up in a foster home where I was constantly berated for being antisocial or not trying to spend time with the family, they knew that I was Autistic, but over time I've been realizing that wasn't the best household to be a part of anyway... lots of toxic traits that I'm sad I'm only now noticing in hindsight...

[maddiemae]

For me it’s mostly having to be “on” when I’m with people. No matter how close I am with them it’s a lot of mental effort to socialize bc we constantly have to calculate what everything means and what the appropriate response would be. And it’s exhausting

[KaterinaMyXa]

I don't think I'm autistic even though I definitely share some traits you're talking about in your videos. But this one...God, I'm so tired trying to explain my mum that I love her but alone time is absolutely a must for me. She thinks that I'm just being rude.

[izssrbz]

I think it’s even harder as a kid when you don’t have the space to decompress like this. Like sharing bedrooms with your siblings, it feels like there’s always people

[ItsTheMagicMelon]

Felt. It’s so difficult to get people to understand that I just need to be completely alone, and that it isn’t because I hate them

[HannahFields]

I lost the most important relationship of my life (aside from my kids) and many good friends over the years because I didn't have a good explanation for this. In general, someone's actions mean more than their words. I get that saying "I love you and I love spending time with you" doesn't mean much if I keep saying I just can't this time. Realizing I'm autistic helped me understand why, but I haven't tried to reach out to old friends, make new ones, or start dating yet. I'm tired of being that asshole, of making people feel neglected and unwanted. I'm tired of feeling like the problem and a constant disappointment. If anyone has any *kind* advice (besides tell people your needs up front, because I know that and I'll do it eventually, lol) I'd be glad to hear it :)

[RhapsosProductions]

I had a friend (emphasis on had) who always seemed to try and make me feel bad because I need my asocial time. It felt very much like my needs < their needs, and, in a general sense, that's partly why we're no longer in each others' lives. I'm not sad about that, but relieved, as I'm now spending time with people who allow me to be me, and many are some flavour of neurodivergent