Theo Von's #1 'ick'

[meleebrawler]

Funnily enough, this would not be considered an ick during the Salem Witch Trials.

[FaithAnswered]

He says the wildest things & somehow makes sense, I love it 😂

[Saxonbrit]

He’s a fukin funny guy he once said “I saw this snail once picked that mf up moved him 2/3 feet …saved him 2/3 days” 😂

[freedomartwork]

Rose to Jack: "I ain't your floatie." 😂

[Yabud_]

Rule #1 in life: stay away from zoonamis.

[redriver]

The first rule of lifeguarding is if someone is panicking they will essentially drown you to get above water so you need to calm them down or two people will die

[canboskurt]

What a way to say "no black girls" 😂😂😂

[animelytical]

"Zoonami"

The Sharknado director: "Write that down. WRITE THAT DOWN!!!"

[themanwithnoname]

Theo von is a treasure, and he must be protected at all costs, even dana white agrees lmfao

[littleluxia]

Zoonami sounds like a bunch of zoo animals were let loose, not just giraffes 🤣

[RiskXd]

“I’m doin Me” dude destroyed me there 🤣😂

[Lawrence_Talbot]

Nah that’s a win not an ick. If she ever cheats or threatens divorce, you can take her out on the boat to “rekindle things”.

[afriendorfoe]

Bruh Brett needs to go on Theo Vons podcast

[JohnAnderson-evlp]

Brings a new meaning to being his anchor

[WearyTraveler_]

Jack from the Titanic needed to hear this

[fairydogmother]

Agree, swimming is one of the most basic survival instincts besides walking and eating 😂

[slimshady]

Theo turning into old drake with the “I’m doin meeh”😂😂😂

[aidens]

As someone who's a lifeguard, I agree. What if we magically teleport in the ocean near the beach? Please learn how to swim in a safe environment. And parents, please watch your kids in the pool... you think they're fine till they're not... trust me... I know

[martinsimpson]

One of the best philosophers of our time.

[jazzman]

Dude, that man is the funniest guy on the planet. 😂😂😂😂😂