A Stepfather's DEEPEST REGRET.

A stoic stepfather’s deepest regret.

Speaker: Tig Notaro

#hiddenpain #vulnerability #childhoodtrauma

[inkajessy]

I have a huge respect for people who have the ability to say “I’m sorry”. People who own their failures are people with integrity.

[tracylawrence]

I had a stepfather and he was awesome. Took on 4 of us when I was 4 and even though they divorced when I was 16 he was always in our lives. He was our Dad and he passed when I was 28. He just wanted to make sure we all grew up and could take care of ourselves and be responsible productive members of society. I loved him. Frederick Louis Happ was a good, honest, patient, caring man. We were lucky to have him in our lives.
I'm 56 now so we were kids from the 70s.

[loriurias]

When I gave birth, I looked at my boy and in wonder, had no idea who he was. A little old Italian man came out. I thought I would know him. I would watch him grow and change and I thought I knew him.
I am still learning who this grown man is. It's been amazing!

[LeMonstreTarot]

Very validating moment. That one sentence can change everything.

[boysrus]

One of the most profound things I have heard was recently. Wish I knew this 40 years ago when I started having children. It was... You are not a carpenter with all the boards and nails and hammer and saw trying to build your children, you are a gardener with a seed that you need to nourish and watch grow and then sit back and see what your child becomes.

[Radiant]

From a father, especially a step father, this is beautiful and profound ❤

[lyndajaeger]

Like my Dad. He started dating my mom when i was 15. They married when i was 28. He walked me down the aisle. He was a jersey navy guy. Very stoic, very blunt. Called me a failure a few times. That i never lived up to my potential. Yes he could be mean, but if i ever needed anything, he was there. If i was sick, he'd have brought me a case of oj and a box of soup. My son was ill, he was doing what he could from the shadows. He never outwardly did anything. Till my Mom died this last March. He cried. Cried. I had never seen that man cry. Except at my wedding. He said he was sorry, that he should have taken a more father role in our lives. I just hugged him and said he was the only father i knew, and i loved him. He passed in August that same year. He just couldn't keep going without my mom.

[TeekTat]

We are never to grown to grow
And never too old to learn .

[goldabernstein]

I love Tig. Her comedy is always kind and quirky. She's never hateful.

[agnieszkaschulz]

That’s why I love my children, 4 individuals and non of them are the same.All different personalities and hobbies and dreams .All from the same mother and father yet so much different individuals.I respect them and love them for who they are❤.To all parents out there love your children unconditionally

[Elizabeth-gzkc]

My father was similar, after a lifetime of clashing, we made our peace 10 years before cancer finally took him. It must have been very confusing for men of the last generation to watch their daughters with so much potential and all rights, forge their own track thru this world, fail, fall and rise again.Before he died, my father told me he was proud of me and that he finally came to understand. Dear Daddy, one of the best! ❤

[OnlyKnowsGod]

That should be the title of a parent book given to all first time parents, its so true.

[traceybugg]

WOW THAT IS PROBABLY ONE OF THE MOST INSIGHTFUL BEAUTIFUL GIFTS A FATHER OR STEP FATHER COULD EVER GIVE TO A CHILD.

[That_Guy_Says_Hi]

One Hell of a realization. To be able to say it as - and TO - a living person is a blessing.

[azovandy.]

Funerals of the most important person you’ll ever know tend to bless you with unknown clarity of thought and wisdom.

[supachaloopa]

Every one deserves that one gift in life when someone says something profound to you and in your heart you are saying "Finally!", but with your words you say "Thank you." She is so lucky to have received that gift.

[BiaFlo]

The ability to learn (especially after a lifetime) and express that you were wrong is a pure form of finally arriving at emotion intelligence. Im sad that Tigg...this courageous woman...wasnt appreciated by him for many years...but I am glad that her step father finally gained the ability to see her as a person, a person who was deserving of empathy, grace amd understanding. Im so glad he was able to admit his faults to her. And hopefully now they can have the type of relationship that they should have always been able to have. My hats off to Tigg and her stepfather. I hope for nothing but the best for their relationship.

[ritawallace-reed]

'I am sorry' is a powerful, healing statement.

[phyllisenglish]

Wish my stepdad had known that lesson. I lived each day feeling I was never enough. Today I know better & am happy with myself & life.

[noname-rsxf]

My mom always learned who I was and for that I’m appreciative ! ❤