The Primary Reason Recovery From Narcissistic Abuse Is So Daunting

Most people who have had long-term exposure to strongly narcissistic people show signs of complex trauma. That is, they have experienced multiple and repeated mistreatments. When you are ready to move away from a narcissist's dysfunction, there is one major hurdle you will need to remove. Dr. Les Carter explains.

📣 Dr. Carter's new course, Anger Games, is now available! 📣

Dr. Les Carter is a best selling author and therapist who has semi-retired to Waco, TX. For 40+ years he maintained a counseling practice in Dallas, conducting more than 65,000 therapy sessions and many workshops and seminars. He specializes in anger management and narcissistic personality disorder. Since creating his YouTube channel, his videos have received more than 125 million views.

You can follow Surviving Narcissism on:
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Dr. Carter has three other courses that you may find to be useful:

[destannysmith]

'NOBDDY RESPONDS WELL TO ABUSE' thankyou so much Dr. Carter

[Tracy_]

Thank you for saying that we aren’t supposed to respond well when someone mistreats us!

[taniadolphy]

Narcissists like to "minimize" their words and actions, making us think we are imagining things. I've learned that over time.

[istateyourname]

Rediscovering self worth after years of devaluation is my biggest hurdle. ❤️

[mancdec]

Often you just know something is off or dysfunctional and gradually realise, even if you're not aware of the term narcissism.

[thebanjodiva]

Thank you for “getting emotional” - it may be the closest thing to sincere care and concern that some of us have received in a very long time. The anonymity component doesn’t lessen that, it simply makes it safer for us to receive. ❤

[MomJ]

Thanks for the emotion. It's COLD out here. People don't know what to say. They don't know what to do. They don't want to be bothered. They don't even try to help or understand 99% of the time. They come across as not caring. Thank you for caring.

[keariewashburn]

Yes Dr Carter. Complex trauma is really difficult. Betrayal trauma 💔

[deborahschmitt]

I am so thankful to hear your voice giving messages of hope and reassurance, because many times others do not know the heart’s sad climb out of despair, due to a personal
battle——a battle that may not be shared. Your willingness to lead one back to peace and acceptance is helping so much. Thank you ❤️

[andreacook]

I’m so grateful for your message this morning. I’m so so grateful for your words, kindness and love in my life. Thank you for helping us and reminding us we do not deserve any kind of abuse. Sending love to all those wonderful kind people who are feeling valueless because their kind heart and value has been undermined by a narcissist. Don’t listen!! You are precious and valuable.

[poetrygirlcanada]

Dr C, I have been watching your videos for a couple of years now but have never posted a comment. I have been on the receiving end of many of the narcissistic behaviors that you describe, and you have helped me understand the "narcissistic pattern." But my favorite videos are the ones like this, where you offer compassionate encouragement and provide suggestions on how to move forward in a healthy way. I believe you were chosen for the work that you do, and you will be greatly rewarded. I wish you much happiness in 2025 and beyond. Thank you. ❤

[aaronkwolfe]

Expecting toxic behavior from non-toxic people was what resisted my recovery. My initial pause to watch and wait for red flags was kind of a red flag others saw in me.

[MarleyLeMar]

So true. Sadly, any narcissistic relationship is always abusive because they require you to abandon yourself and play a role. The only way you can stop the abuse is to quit playing the game, in whatever way you do that. I believe when you recognize the game and you find a way to stop participating in it, your recovery from it will start to take shape in the way you need it to. I hope so. Much love and Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays to all.

[nancyhansen]

This absolutely hit the nail on the head! Two years of no contact with a horrifically narcissistic brother and his equally toxic wife. Two years of an endless stream of his flying monkeys. Having to walk away from my whole family just to recover. This video was exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you.

[brucefriedman]

Divine inspiration to overcome all obstacles begins with humility. This fundamental concept eludes narcissists, and their sadness for having embarked on an ill-fated journey is incongruent with those who are on the path to having a life of love and peace. The path to recovery begins with understanding narcissists, like others, are incapable of being judged by any mortal and they are solely responsible for meeting their own fate.

[lifeyunique]

The narcissist I met had already broken a kind, beautiful, humble woman before me, the mother of his children, so once I saw his strategy and how weak he really was although he thought he wasn't I knew I couldn't tolerate him trying to tear me down.I reflected his mess back on him and didn't buy his lies! I thank Holy God that His grace was sufficient to help me stand!!!!

[helenebezencon]

This video is a wonderful Christmas present, Dr. Carter. I know you mean it that way, and it is very much appreciated.

[drebugsita]

“Nobody responds well to being abused.” Wow, thank you, Dr C! Certainly have been negatively characterized as “angry” and “difficult” by them, and only them

[nicolemctavish]

I have been dealing with this problem for many years. I have essentially recovered but it is a complicated and multi-faceted struggle. It still rears its ugly head from time to time. Thank you for understanding the depth of the difficulties that narcissistic abuse survivors face. You are truly a gifted and insightful man. Thank you for your support. Your videos are lifesavers for many, many people.

[dogs_and_a_Girl]

Gus stood up and moved when you said, "Enough!" Powerful video from your heart! Thank you Dr. C for all your videos this year and many years past. Asking for prayers that I can find the resources to move forward; OUT of the pathology of the narcissist. I have had enough. Just retired and finding the resources really overwhelming to move out of this place of unhappiness.