Meck Meck Meck Meck Meck Meck Meck Meck Meck Meck Meck Meck Meck Meck Meck Meck Meck Meck Meck Meck

Sorry about all these random vids-
You don’t have to read this-
It also might contain cussing-

I wish I could fall asleep earlier
If I were to fall asleep earlier, I wouldn’t have to lay in bed thinking about everything going on. I wouldn’t have to make up scenarios, or lie to myself. I wouldn’t have to cry. I wouldn’t have to feel alone. But in reality, I am all of those things and all those things happen. I get into full panic mode at night and break out into tears. The next day I feel sick and tired. I don’t want to do anything. I don’t think anyone understands that. I don’t think anyone understands the feeling I get. I feel so tired and unmotivated and sick and dead. That I won’t even get up to eat sometimes. So I don’t want to do my damn work. I don’t. I’m just going to let myself fail. I’m giving up. I’ve been venting more but still less as well. I haven’t talked to anyone in weeks and I don’t plan on it. Someone made me afraid to. Someone made me feel I wasn’t able to. Someone made me feel I shouldn’t because it’s making them feel worse. I’m not going to share who that is. And I don’t plan on opening up to anyone and going into anymore depth than I am here. I just want to sleep. But that’s hard to do when you’re crying your eyes out, and continuing to think, and letting your emotions take over. I don’t want to wake up either. I don’t want anything to do with life anymore. I’m repeating myself. I know I’ve said it before. I’m not going to kill myself. I have no way to do so. And I know some people in this world do really care. I don’t want to hurt them. But I keep hurting me. I might do this for a while maybe every night. Ignore them. I might not do anymore. Who knows. I’ll keep you guys updated on certain things tho. I just needed to get some stuff out. I know you guys want to help and want me to talk. But I can’t. I’m sorry. This is all I can really put. This is all I can really say. There’s more, I’ll let you know that. But I’m not gonna share it with anyone because like I said earlier it doesn’t feel right anymore. It’s really not good for anyone to hold in their feelings but it’s fine. I don’t really care. I’ll be ok I guess. Eventually hopefully. But till then it’s ok. I love you guys so much. Please don’t worry about it too much. This is just to get stuff off my chest and stuff you know. It helps me to just write it all down and have a few people see it and stuff. I’ll be back posting actual content soon. I’m working on a scary glmm and hopefully I don’t lose motivation. Most likely will but whatever. 💕💕
Oof this is long

[riley]

Sorry if I don’t respond to your comments.. I really enjoy all of your support. It makes me feel a lot better that people really care. 💞 Please stay safe. I won’t open up, but don’t feel like you can’t. I don’t feel comfortable to open up anymore about anything. You don’t have to. Please talk to me. Please. It makes me feel better if I can help people. If you ever need to talk
Instagram: dawn._beary or nitrogen_slurpy
Discord: depressed.lima.bean#2214
If you don’t have those, contact me here and I’ll try and work something out.
Please talk to me if you need anything. Im always here
Feel safe to

[GhostlyK_Haze]

I can't sleep either... my gut sometimes hurts so bad I can't stand.. I shall hug you! *hugs* 🤗

[Ichigotf]

:c I feel ya T^T...
Well hopefully you feel better <3
Dont give up, just know you can get through whatever problem your in rn
^^ <3

[adri.mp]

Sometimes I cry in bed while just trying to go sleep too. I really cant help it and idek WHY. But I understand that you're feeling a bit down and isolating yourself.

🎀L💕O💗V💞E💘💓💞💗🔫
Stay safe ♡