How To Make A 'Player' Guy Commit

You’ve heard the saying: once a player, always a player? But is that true or is there a way to turn a serial dater into a loving boyfriend once and for all?

Hi, I’m Lucy Goldman. I’m a love and commitment expert from LoveLearnings and I focus on women’s dating. So if you want to find love in the modern meat market, you’ve come to the right place. I offer simple, foolproof tips that make you more desirable to men in the long term. If that sounds like something you can use, please subscribe to this channel for a new video every week.

Today we’re going to be talking about how to make a player commit. It may sound far fetched but there are simple things you can do right now to change his mindset and make him take you seriously. As always, there are no guarantees but these methods are backed by psychology so they could be exactly what you need.

First off, we need to look at why this guy is a player.

There are plenty of reasons a man will opt for a player lifestyle over a committed relationship. Many men are players simply because they haven’t met the right woman. Some are players because they fear commitment or don’t understand how to create and maintain a relationship outside of the bedroom. Others still are players because they lack the emotional intelligence to understand the value of a relationship. Some are even players just because they’re so attractive that they’ve never known any other way. I can’t say for sure what your guy’s reason is for being a player, but you’d better put some thought into what motivates him if you want to win his heart.

For example, take one of my clients--Katy. Katy had been seeing this guy Hank off and on for a couple of months when she reached out to me. She said that they had so much fun together and she’d never connected with a guy on this level before. The problem was that he was unwilling to put any label on their relationship and he’d disappear for weeks at a time, leaving Katy feeling unwanted and taken for granted. Katy and I took a good look at Hank, his priorities, his wants and his needs, and we came to a conclusion: Hank was a player because he was afraid to get hurt. Hank had had a really bad breakup just a couple of years before he met Katy and even though he truly loved Katy, he was afraid to open up again and risk going through the same pain and heartbreak all over again. Armed with this knowledge, Katy was able to take things slow with Hank and slowly work her way into his heart. I’m happy to say that Katy and Hank just got engaged a few months ago.

Now, this is a difficult factor to correctly identify and doing so does not guarantee you’ll be able to get a player to change his ways. Many men are players because they are young and not ready to settle down. If that’s the case, it may be time to move on.

Next, let’s talk about why you two should be together.

Players have the tendency to be very charming and are able to make just about any woman fall in love with them. So you need to ask yourself: do I see a future with this guy or have I just fallen for his natural charm and charisma? This isn’t always an easy question to answer. It takes some digging but if you can look at things as they really are, with your eyes open, you’ll be more able to take the next step into locking him down.

It’s all about a mindset shift. Right now you’re saying “what can I do to make him commit to me?” You need to be asking “what can he do to make me want to commit to him?” This change of mindset will come out in subtle ways and you’ll start to notice him slowly modifying his behaviour to try to impress you and win your heart.

Now I’m going to give you some obvious but powerful advice: to make a player commit, you need to play hard to get. It’s advice as old as time but with a modern twist. I want you to do your best to keep your distance from this guy for a little while. Bail out on plans, don’t text him very often, and keep him on the backburner. I know, it’s the opposite of what you want, and what you feel compelled to do but it really does work, and here’s why:

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[celiaescalante]

I need videos like this. This thanksgiving I felt suicidal. The terror of believing I could have spent the holidays with our family gave me so much anxiety and desperation.

I know how to chase him away, but when he replies he's nonchalant. He likes blocking and unblocking me.

[emyywolf]

The question is.. do you want to?
Players are STD ridden. You’d likely catch something. And that’s if the player doesn’t get bored with you after some years