We Thought Hannah Was Pregnant | Our Infertility Story

Our entire infertility journey from start to finish (sort of).

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Our address:
Squirmy and Grubs
PO Box 16411
Minneapolis, MN 55416

Shane Burcaw (he/him) is the author of several award-winning books about disability. He is the President of a nonprofit organization called Laughing At My Nightmare, and a renowned public speaker who has performed across the country at places such as Harvard University, The University of Florida, The University of Connecticut, Princeton University, and many more.

Hannah Burcaw (she/her) graduated from Carleton College, where she studied Sociology and Anthropology. She films and edits the “Squirmy and Grubs” vlog, which has over 1,000,000 subscribers on YouTube. Hannah has spoken at prestigious universities and Fortune 500 companies alike about the realities of ableism. On her popular Instagram account, she advocates for acceptance of all people and works to improve the way society thinks about disability.

Shane and Hannah have been together for over seven years. They got married in September of 2020 in the midst of a global pandemic in their backyard, with their officiant conducting the ceremony via Zoom. Their interabled relationship often confuses people, because much of society still cannot fathom people with disabilities being involved in loving, intimate relationships. Anyone who watches these episodes will quickly see their relationship is just as “normal” as any other. Sure, Hannah helps Shane use the bathroom and brush his teeth, but those activities do not detract from the emotional, intellectual, and physical connection they experience together.

[fernandochavez]

Whether you have children or not, will have no bearing on the impact you’ve both had while on this planet. You’re awesome. Thanks

[odapunkt]

Can people stop commenting "dont worry, you will be pregnant soon" its insensitive

[dfsmguk]

4.5 year journey for my husband and I and it was very difficult. We are currently 31 weeks pregnant naturally after 3 failed medicated IUIs. It’s still unbelievable and I pray for all couples wanting to build a family. All of you deserve it and are worthy.

[nataliemoore]

As someone who rode this roller coaster for 12 years.. it takes a toll emotionally and financially. We adopted after 9 years TTC. We got spontaneously pregnant 1 year later but she was born too early to survive (20 weeks) and died shortly after birth. We got pregnant with our rainbow baby a few months before an IVF cycle after 12 years of trying.
There are lots of options to explore to be parents if you keep an open mind. Stay strong!
We had both male factor and female factor

[alekhidell]

Thank you both for your candor in discussing this topic. I know you committed several years ago to sharing your personal lives with what has become literally an audience of millions, but it's still noteworthy that you're willing to discuss a sensitive topic like this - not in the abstract, but based on your actual experiences. There's so much junk out there on social media, so it's refreshing to see a mature, adult conversation about a difficult journey.

[anthonypecorara]

Y’all, they aren’t looking for advice or suggestions. They are two well educated adults that know how to research and have open discussions. With everything that they’ve shared, which they’re not required to do any of, they know their options and are looking into all of them.

Thank y’all for sharing your journey, it’s great getting to know a small piece of you.

[Sian_reviews]

I love that you are willing to be open and honest about the journey whilst keeping your humour. I did 5 years of IVF in my 30’s that resulted in no children, it was beyond tough. It took everything I had to keep moving forward. In my 50’s now and still with my husband, we accepted that children were just not part of our journey and it’s okay. We have a great life!❤

I wish you all the best, I hope you make the right decisions for you as a couple and that you continue to be willing to share. The more knowledge is out there the better off we all are. IVF was almost a dirty word when I went through it in the late 90s. Most people have no idea of the immense physical and emotional toll it takes on both of you.

As a complete stranger I send you big virtual hugs. ❤

[kimoakleaf]

I’m in awe of your honesty and ability to respect/support each other. Thank you for this post

[RianShafer]

I think we are all sorry the treatments didn't work out. It's good you two talk openly about it all for those that really need to hear it, to know they are far from alone. Sooner or later you will decide on a new plan for you to have a family & you will be most excellent parents. You are well on your way to TWO MILLION subs, that's a lot of aunties & uncles!

[elizabethharttley]

Your humor and adult emotional health says so much. Keep on being friends and in love.
❤😊

[GemmaBevilacqua]

I love how you talk about it, that's so matter of fact, no judgement whatsoever, no guilt placing. Love you as a couple and wish you all the best!

[soniaclarke]

It takes great courage for you both to be so open about your journey for a baby. Only those who have walked this road can fully understand. You are truely an amazing couple and you give such joy to others,

[danasorrells]

"Remarkably fun." I love your sense of humor Shane. I pray that you both are blessed with a child soon.

[chrisflood]

I love how open and comfortable you are sharing your story. It's a sensitive and personal experience to go through and you both discuss it with such compassion and grace. There's no doubt you've touched couples going through this. ❤

[NavajoSunBeauty]

My daughter, surrogate through IVF, gave birth to twins a few days ago, for her sister-in-law who has been trying for 16.5 yrs!! My daughter is a twin. Selfless act she gave ❤

[jmccrary]

My Heart goes out to you both, it took me 5 years to conceive so I understand the coaster you were on.. Then one day I told my Husband it's just going to be You & Me in this Life.. 2 months later I found out we were going to have a baby, we even got to the point of filling out adoption papers.. Good Luck, Keep Praying

[mariannetfinches]

That you both managed to get through something so difficult as a team, comes as no surprise. You've been modeling a healthy, loving relationship online for a good while.
I'm so sorry you didn't get the outcome you'd hoped for. Thanks for sharing & for being vulnerable. I know it will help many people

[lindacompton]

I love the way you can discuss such hard areas in your lives with others. Your love for each other is amazing. My husband and I have been married for 61 years and I don’t think we could be as open as you two are.

[mommabierman]

I’m sure some comments resonate with you and others don’t. I hope this one does. Yes, I’ve birthed 2 children and there is something mind blowing about birthing a child. I hope you are able to Hannah with all my heart. But please also know that being amazing parents has little to do with producing sperm to fertilize eggs. Once you are responsible for a baby (regardless of how they landed in your arms), the biology part is irrelevant! I hope this gives you some comfort and confidence!!

[DivineMzM]

Bless you both for sharing your very personal and vulnerable journey. It will only strengthen your relationship moving forward, however this new phase of your lives unfolds. I'm sending you so much love xx