To the Girl Who Is Trying So Hard to Keep the Guy Who Doesn’t Deserve Her

Realizing that a man we love doesn’t treat us right and accepting that he doesn’t deserve us is one of the hardest things for any woman to admit. But, it is also one of the bravest. Because that is the first step of the healing process.

When I was younger, I looked at women who were mistreated by their partners and me kind of judged them. I knew many of these women personally and I knew most of the things they were going through. I also knew these were smart women and it was impossible for them to be unaware of the way their partners treated them.

It was then when I finally started looking at things from their perspective. At the beginning of my toxic relationship, my then boyfriend treated me like a queen. He did everything in his power to win me over. I thought this was the guy I’ve been waiting for all along.

And even then, when I talked to some of my female friends who had partners who didn’t deserve them, I couldn’t understand how come they don’t leave them and what are they fighting for. How come they didn’t see that there are great men out there, similar to my boyfriend, who can give them everything they deserved?

And then karma hit me. And it made me regret every bad thought I had about these women.

Well, first of all, it was out of fear. Don’t get me wrong- I was never afraid of him and he never physically abused me nor did he ever threaten to physically do me harm if I left him.

I was afraid that I would never be capable of loving a man the way I loved him. I knew my worth and I knew he didn’t deserve me, but all those years of bad treatment and disrespect had left a mark on me.

I never once thought of all the happy years that were waiting for me if I leave him- I only thought about our past together.

I knew how much nerves, health, time and energy I’ve invested in that relationship and I wasn’t going to let it go without a fight.

It took me long before I realized that I was actually playing the role of Don Quijote and that I was fighting the windmills. I wasn’t fighting with my man alongside- I was fighting against him.

And he did chase me. But not because he loved me- he did it because I was a suitable victim of his emotional manipulation.

You probably wonder how I have finally left him for good. Well, one time, he didn’t chase after me. He let me go. I left him, waiting for him to call me, waiting for him to come back.

But, that never happened. And somehow, I’ve managed not to be the one to contact him. I assume I still had a bit of pride left.

So, if you are going through a situation similar to mine, I won’t be a smart ass and tell you to leave. Of course, this is what you should do, but you already know that, don’t you? I will tell you to stop hoping he’ll change because he won’t.

I will tell you to stop holding on to the years you had with him, because happier moments and years are waiting for you.

I will tell you to try to find peace and strength inside of you because I know you have it. I will tell you to spend some time with yourself and your thoughts and rewind your relationship back in your head.

How did you manage to go against your heart and leave the man you knew wasn't the right one for you? Let us know in the comment section below....

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#thinkaloud #girl #TryingSoHard #KeepTheGuy #Doesn'tDeserveHer #hoped #HeWouldChange #LetMeGo #breakups #relationships

Timestamps ⏰
0:00 Intro
1:10 In the beginning, everything seemed perfect
1:54 Emotional abuse begins
2:44 I couldn't let go of him
3:53 I tried everything to make him change
4:32 Then, he stopped chasing after me