You Finally Find your Favorite Coffee Shop

[FlexiCake]

Dude explained his whole life story in a single movie scene with ~60 seconds of screen time

[haziqkhan]

The fact he didn't stutter scares me more than the hit man coming to extinguish Steve's whole bloodline

[ThatDudeAgainRemastered]

I just imagine an assistant saying, " I think he likes you!" After he leaves.

[stevemattero]

"Red means black.
Black means frappuccino matcha."

Simply brilliant

[jpeg]

This is the same energy as "My name is Yoshikage Kira, I am 33 years old-"

[angelherrejon]

"If you're out sick, I wanna know three days in advance." Had me rolling 🤣

[Brandon-ffyo]

"she's lesbian so don't try to hit on her, trust me I've tried" *2 seconds later*
"I'm married"

[Thegameguy]

"Here's my card. If you have any questions, don't call me. I'll call you" feels like the biggest middle finger anyone can receive

[heartless_]

Bro I just started working at a coffee shop and all the regulars are EXACTLY like this. They get mad that I don't know their orders when I've literally never seen them in my life

[thatasiankidwhopacksthewho]

"i dont give out my name"

*Proceeds to tell his life story*

[idkyet]

“Don’t hit on her she’s lesbian trust me I tried. I’m married with 3 kids-“ that’s quite the twist

[jackiebiskan]

It's terrifying that I actually had a customer scarily close to this but great part is after he finished his rant and I wrote them down. He gave me a $500 tip and I have been making his exact order at the exact same time every day that he comes. It's been two years and each Christmas he gives me a very generous tip. Great man! Absolutely insane but the great man

[Pindolene]

Okay but when you find a barista who makes coffee exactly to your taste, it's a bond you really shouldn't break.

[memuire]

“Here’s my card if you have any questions don’t call me I’ll call you” 😂

[datkingwukong]

“Don’t call me I’ll call you”
“If you’re sick let me know 3 days in advance”

[connorhussey]

"I have three kids but two of whom I've disowned since they gave their life up to Christ" 😭😭😭🤣

[_..M.._]

What I learned when I watched this

His name is Greg
He works at a building 4 blocks north coming from a subway station 2 blocks south
Every Monday, Tuesday, and possibly Friday he expects an oat milk vanilla latte
At exactly 8:40 am


Communication through tie:
Blue = usual
Red: black
Black = Frappuccino matcha
Pink = surprise me

His assistant's bio

24 yrs old
Columbia graduate
Has strong Filipino accent
Name is Niqole with a q
Don't hit on her


his bio

Is married
Has 3 kids but disowned 2
Is agnostic
Left leaning
Enjoys playing devils advocate




Don't call him, he'll call you
If your sick, let him know 3 days in advance
Follow rules or he'll send hitman Carlos and end your entire bloodline ( he might be kidding or not)

[jenniferlynne]

As a barista we have a regular who rarely speaks, orders the same drink everyday, wears sunglasses and always on the phone but will tip like a boss. Pretty sure he’s in the Russian mafia but we don’t ask questions.

[meatkirbo]

“Don’t hit on her, I tried”
“I’m married”
Oh boy

[mysavageconstantine]

Bro hit him with that Kira Yoshikage level of speech