This is Exactly How You Should NOT Raise Your Kids! | Neil deGrasse Tyson on Impact Theory

There you will get direct access to Tom and the team PLUS exclusive content, offers, and so much more. Jump on in and get started on becoming legendary!

He may be the world’s most famous astrophysicist, and he is best known for his ability to communicate complex scientific concepts. But on this episode of Impact Theory with Tom Bilyeu, Neil deGrasse Tyson shows that his prodigious intellect can take on an incredibly wide range of topics. He shares his family history, his ideas about education and religion, and his beliefs about how we can get along better with those who are different from us. Along the way, he gives some brilliant and unusual parenting advice, describes the best way to deal with haters and microaggressions, and describes his process for learning new things.

SHOW NOTES:

Neil reminisces about being named the world’s sexiest astrophysicist [3:21]
Neil remembers the best lessons his father taught him [5:00]
Neil advocates pluralism, celebrating differences instead of aggravating them [10:10]
Neil explains how to convert microaggressions into enthusiasm [13:26]
Neil discusses how his father taught him to be effective instead of being right [18:23]
Neil explains that he is driven by duty, not ambition [22:15]
Neil advocates that we create meaning in life, we don’t find it [27:49]
Neil shares some unique parenting advice [30:14]
Neil describes in great detail his process for learning new things [36:48]
Neil advocates the importance of seeking disconfirming evidence [43:23]
Neil wants you to learn what science is, and how it works [44:41]
Neil makes a surprising statement about the impact he wants to have [47:13]

QUOTES:

“It’s not enough to be right. You have to be effective.” [18 29]
“You have the power to create meaning in your life, rather than passively looking for it.” [28:32]
“I can tell you this. If Einstein were here, and we’re talking with Einstein, we could talk with him for hours and hours. And you know what question would never come out of our mouths? ‘What college did you go to?” [34:05]

FOLLOW NEIL:

BOOKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

[leonjhendrix]

I remember 3 years ago Tom was speaking in Austin at a conference who I flew into from Europe. He ended up spending HOURS after his talk outside, speaking with people up to the point where it was getting really late and only me, my friend and 3 other people were sitting around in a circle. He was answering all of our questions.


I'll never forget that because it shows that he really really cares. That's been a huge inspiration for me to give back in the future as well when I'm in the position to mentor others.


Thanks Tom,


- Leon

[shaylinnaidoo]

My 18 month old is gonna love the fact I watched this interview

[ossen]

Humans are realest when they are children
We, adults teach them how to forget the true nature of being.

[wickedstigma]

"Be ashamed to die until you have scored some victory for humanity" what a quote! Thanks @NeilDeGrasse

[Blue_rd]

It’s refreshing to see an interviewer who lets their guest speak. Thank you! Subbed.

[lululashlounge]

This man has helped me so much.When he spoke of his family being rational instead of making decisions based upon religious beliefs.I was raised as a JW and I realize my family made irrational decisions based on JW beliefs.This man is so smart.

[abhishekchoudhary]

If teachers are like him every child will be scientist

[roiferreach]

I felt so guilty stealing curiosity in my son, damn! it makes me cry. Thanks Neil, I love you man you are saving my parenting and my son's fullest potential to this world. Your advice sounds like a father speaking. And thanks Tom for sharing this.

[adityaprasetiyo]

I let my daughter go out.. climb things, play dirt at evening, whatever she found intersting outside for 2-3 hours just before shower...

[richwilson]

"You have the power to create meaning in your life..."

~ Neil deGrasse Tyson

[checkfoldcallraise]

I discovered Neil while surfing Netflix. I came across the title "the inexplicable universe ", and started to watch episode 1. I was always intrigued by science and loved it since grade school but this man brought back my child-like curiosity and hunger for science in my adulthood. I felt like a student watching his show and learning things about astrophysics that just blew my mind. I love that he is so humble about it too. He taught me how small we really are yet how amazing it is that we are part of the very elements that are scattered across the entire universe. I look at the sky differently and it is sadly so lost on most everyone around me.

[Trezker]

Words can't hurt you unless you take them from whomever spoke them and use them to hurt yourself.

[ErikaK]

Let the child be free, experiment, let them choose and be curious. Let them choose who they want to be and be there to guide them, support them and teach them how to love, how to become a better version of themselves every day ♡

[toddvandell]

Ah, that story of the mom & her child walking in the rain struck a real nerve with me, because I had a similar thing happen with my now-ex-wife and our son, and hearing Neil's story felt to me like one of the things I did as a parent was the right thing.
Hearing Neil's story allowed me to give myself permission to feel validated that something I did as a parent was actually the right thing to do.
At least on one occasion.
In that particular teachable moment.
Oh, but first?
Let me say:
I was not a perfect father.
I was not a perfect husband.
(The fact she's now my EX-wife, gives strong testimony & credence to THAT fact.)
But there was a time when our son was young, 4 or 5 maybe, when we took him to a park.
There were all the usual fun things to play on available.
Swings, slides, jungle gym I think, fort to climb on and slide off, etc.
But, what captured my son's attention almost instantly?
A sand pit with a steel push carousel.
The kind that require you manually push them to make them turn?
Yeah.
One of those.
Do those even exist anymore?
(Him being an only child, the fact there were other kids on it already, many his own age?
I believe was likely the most enticing aspect for him.
He wanted to have fun on that carousel with them.
But I digress.)
Those carousels have/had safety grab bars that you grab to hoist yourself aboard them.
Essentially, there are 2 ways to get on one of those.
The first way is the easiest:
Wait until it stops spinning, then climb on.
The second way is to try to follow the spinning carousel and jump on or grab a passing hand hold and pull yourself on, while it's still spinning.
Obviously, the second method is much riskier.
One need not be an astrophysicist to figure that out.
🙂🙂🙂😉😉😉
(My now-ex-wife was a bit overprotective of our son, it also bears noting.
I tended to feel she molly-coddled him.
I always felt that the best way to teach him anything, but ESPECIALLY why NOT to do something?
Allow him to do it, and then, when he has an adverse experience?
He learns why he should not do whatever it was we as parents might have felt was unsafe for him.
Within reasonable parameters, certainly.
We didn't need to have him fall off a cliff in order for him to understand that it's wise to avoid walking close to the edge of that cliff to learn that fact if you do, you could fall off, and get really hurt, or die, for one extreme example.)
So he was walking quickly toward the carousel, with singular focus and determination, while it was spinning.
Rapidly spinning.
My wife reached out to grab him to stop him and I said:
"Let him go. Let's see what he does.
Will he wait until it stops to get on?
Or try to jump on while it's spinning?
If he jumps, he'll get hurt, BUT he'll also learn NOT to try that again, and then he'll wait until it stops or slows down to get on."
She didn't want him to get hurt.
Mother hen tendency, which I totally get.
But she let him go off by himself, while we watched.
He tried to jump on, got a slight clunk on his head and landed on the ground next to the carousel.
He was mildly hurt, but more startled than anything else.
The other kids saw he wanted to get on, so they slowed the carousel down to stop it so he could get on.
He got hurt trying his way, true.
But, he learned to stop and wait until the carousel stopped spinning before trying to get on.
In retrospect?
A perfect teachable moment.
An opportunity for him to learn FOR HIMSELF, that curiosity is good, but it can sometimes be dangerous and potentially harmful.
No better teacher than experience.
(If you touch a hot stove while it's hot?
You learn not to touch it next time until you KNOW for sure it's not hot.)

[kayleighjackson]

I am in awe. This is such an excellent interview.

[Livefree]

I've walked the path of Science and spirituality separately only leading to struggle
When I learned to combined the two I recieved the keys to the universe. Much love to all of you #manifestgreatness

[DM-ogfq]

Wow. Pretty sure this interview just changed my life. Most insightful comments I've ever heard about meaning and purpose, living as a minority, dealing with racism, parenting consciously, and contributing to the world. Never heard Dr. Tyson talk about topics other than science and space until now and I am truly inspired and enlightened.

[leonjhendrix]

Taking notes now so I have them ready in 10 years when I'll have kids

[LeytonJayCougarWolfDaddy]

I so love Neil, we had some good conversation time under the night sky in New Mexico while filming Cosmos...thank you Neil and Tom for bringing him on your show!

[beckyjogilbert]

Neil is definitely one of my favorite people! I am the mom who holds my son's hand and we jump in that puddle together... Encourage imagination, creativity, thoughts, ideas, chaos, compassion, and love over all (in my opinion, of course) makes for great parent.