My Wife Makes WAY More Money Than Me (I Feel Insecure)

My Wife Makes WAY More Money Than Me (I Feel Insecure)

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[jimv]

Recently I left Software Engineering and took a 50% paycut to work at home in Supply Management. My wife got a 40% raise at a new job across the street in the medical field. She now makes 3X more than me literally. I threw my ego out the window YEARS AGO before all this. She knows I will retire before age 50 and she is fine working til age 59 since she finds purpose in her job. I'm a money guy who handles the finance and investments for our family. We're a team and that is all that matters.

[cnpm]

I appreciate him for facing this. So many guys just turn angry and hateful about it, my dad and some ex's included.

[jt]

Men say they would love this situation until it happens to them…

[dakotaflower]

Dude, you went into Education to help others grow. Your wife knew what she was marrying. Your not some loser not going to work to earn more. You chose a field you knew you weren’t gonna make an abundance of money. Women care more about a man who goes to work and has purpose - you have it. Own it. Good luck brother.

[jones]

i recently saw my uncle disparage his wife about studying to pass the bar now that their kids are grown and out of the house. they met in law school and graduated together. for all i know, she had better grades, but she took a back seat and became a SAHM so he could become the lawyer, a career he eventually left. they have only ever spoken glowingly about each other, so i tell you, the crack i felt in my heart when i saw him ridicule her publically for studying to pass the bar. why not help her study? why not clear out a space in the house for her study materials? i just don't understand men's logic sometimes.

[tinah]

I’m going through this with my boyfriend. I’m make significantly more than him. Everything was fine at first then he started acting different. Little comments and jabs. He finally said he felt insecure and felt like he was competing with me. He was feeling jealous because I already made more then I got promoted and make even more. It’s rough. I try to support him but I can’t stop being me. It’s like women can’t win no matter what we do.

[sanyundekou]

One thing you cannot do in a marriage is be in competition with your spouse. You're in it together. Definitely kick your ego out the door.

[smustipher]

I would LOVE it if I were married and my spouse made more than me. It would mean more money to save and advance. Competing with your spouse is never a good idea.

[UTOT]

You are young, build a life together! Men you are SO much more than a paycheck. I wouldn’t be where I am today without the support of my husband. Money is important but no amount will ever erase your insecurities. You are valuable. Wishing this caller the best.

[kmb]

This happened to me. I started making 3times what my ex-husband did. On the surface he supported me. But behind closed doors he treated me terribly which i think was because of his insecurities. I forgave him for sexting a woman, then for flirting online with an ex, then for getting fired for sexual harassment, then i found a dating profile and just shut up - never mentioned it. He worked full time but smoked marijuana which eventually became a daily habit. He stopped taking me out or surprising me. I was trying to work a demanding job to provide a better life for us, bigger house in a nicer area, nicer cars. I looked after the kids and kept on top of the housework and paid 70% of everything. Until i realised nothing i did would ever be good enough and i had a mental breakdown.

[angelica]

In a marriage or relationship one person always makes more money than the other. Doesn't make you less of a person.

[sarahgrohmusic]

Getting to the core of believing we are enough. He has to dig down and believe and then…take to steps.

[jeffmartinaz]

I'm in a very similar boat. I'm a college professor making $85k on a good year. My wife doubles my salary blindfolded and is twice as intelligent and WAY better looking than I am. I've always felt like she settled. But, I know she loves me. I know I love her. And, I couldn't give a rat's ass what the rest of the world thinks. This is one of the better calls I've heard from John. I definitely took some advice to heart here.

[ShariWalker-fn]

My husband and I are in the same boat. I retired from the military so with my pension and my salary now I make about 3 times more than he does. We combine finances and I can’t imagine thinking less of him. He is literally the hardest worker I’ve ever met and I love that about him. Friends make jokes about him having a ‘sugar mama’ but I know it doesn’t bother him

[rebeccaoprea]

Relationships, work, etc doesn’t solve the problems, it reveals them.

[lotusfire]

John, you knocked this one out of the park. Love the way you walked him through stuck to a forward direction with optimism. He even found his laughter by the end!

[HitmanChase]

I feel like that’s a good problem to have. Right now my wife is in nursing school, I’m so excited for her to graduate and find work so we can be a double income household.

[quarterlimit]

Why does he CARE what ex girlfriends think?!

[xyznumber]

I am so thankful for these calls. I have experienced this multiple times in my life when I was dating.

[AlphaphenomenonGaming]

This was very well handled and why I enjoy listening to Dr. John Delony. Just finished his book "How to live a non-anxious life" and enjoyed it. I resonated with this man so much. My fiance (we're set to get married next August) loves me and never, ever lies to me yet because of childhood trauma and abuse I have such low self esteem and I don't want to marry her knowing that she loves me more than I love myself. I am working on my anxiety/depression/self worth and hopefully one day, I'll finally look in the mirror and believe that I deserve to be alive and loved so incredibly much by my beautiful fiance. I won't give up and I'm going to break my generational curse. Wonderful message in this video.