The Parenting Journey

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Help with parenting Teenager

I live in the Midwest, and one of the truisms I learned growing up was “If you don’t like the weather, just wait five minutes and it will change.” This wisdom holds true for our life as a parent as well. The circumstances within our families are in a constant state of change, and with each change, we are confronted with new challenges to overcome. The most obvious example of this is the fact that our children are growing up; consequently, each and every day we are confronted with a first of some kind: The first time they say “No” to us. The first day of school. The first time they forget their homework. The first boyfriend or girlfriend. The first time they drive a car. The list could go on and on. On top of the natural process of growing up, the parent/child relationship is being challenged by a variety of other potential issues, for example:

The birth of a second child
A best friend moves away
A new job requires the family to move to a new city
Getting cut from the baseball team
The pressure of getting the lead in the school play
Crashing the family car
Coming up with a plan to pay for college

Again, the list could go on and on.

My definition of a successful family include the following: -

The ability to effectively deal with any difficult issues that come their way.

The first step in developing the ability to overcome and, more importantly, recover from the inevitable challenges you will face as a parent is to adapt a love-based mindset. A love-based mindset provides three benefits: First, love has healing properties; it restores us. Next, a love based mindset provides a framework and the energy for growth. And finally, love-based principles, values, and beliefs are the source of our creativity and resourcefulness.

Interestingly, when you view your role as a parent from a love-based mindset, you embrace the ever-changing circumstances. You see them as part of the journey and valuable teaching moments.

On the other hand…

If you find yourself struggling within your role as a parent, especially as a parent of a teenager, I can guarantee you that you are stuck in a fearful mindset.

Try this:

Create a pause. Stop what you are doing and take a couple of deep breaths.
Once you feel composed, ask yourself this question: “If I could shift to a loving perspective, how would this circumstance look different and what would I do differently?”

Remember, being intentional and choosing a loving perspective… changes everything.